Eight Mortal Secrets [Hetalia Drabbles] (Completed, to be Edited)

Mini Drabble LXIV: Kosher

"Shelby," Alfred called, half-singing as he entered the house. Instantly, Apollo pounced, licking Alfred's hands as he walked in. He laughed and bent down, petting the dog as Shelby looked up from her school work, "I'm about to be the best boyfriend ever."

"How so?" She laughed, curious to see where this was going.

"Well, remember how you found out you might be Jewish?" Alfred inquired.

"... yes." Shelby was hesitant to see where this was going.

"Well, I decided that I should show you that I fully embrace your Jewishness." Alfred explained, before slamming a container of Kosher salt on the end table.

Shelby stared at it for a few seconds, before busting out laughing.

Alfred frowned. "What? Don't Jewish people eat kosher food?"

Shelby was laughing too hard to even formulate words for about 30 seconds. Finally, she managed to choke out an answer, "Kosher- salt- isn't- kosher- in- that- sense." She stuttered through gasps for air.

Alfred raised a brow. "But it says kosher on the container."

"Kosher means the food has been blessed, hon." Shelby stated, still giggling. "Kosher salt... it's just how fine the crystals of salt are."

"Well, how do I bless the salt?" Alfred asked.

"Alfred, you can't bless the food." The brunette was still laughing. "Plus, even if I am ethnically Jewish, I'm not... Jewish-Jewish, as in Hanukkah and synagogues and such. I'm still a Christian. Me and Jesus go way back."

Alfred flopped down on the couch, looking utterly defeated as Apollo jumped up on his lap. She smiled. "That was still very considerate, Alfie."

He looked over with puppy dog eyes. "Am I still the best boyfriend ever?"

"Of course." Shelby chuckled.

He stuck out his lower lip, completely the despondent look. "Can I have a kiss?" He asked in a child-like voice.

"You're impossible." Shelby shook her head, leaning over, and pecking him on the nose. He smiled, his face flushing slightly as he rearranged himself so that his head rested on her lap, Apollo sprawling out over his abdomen and legs.