Eight Mortal Secrets [Hetalia Drabbles] (Completed, to be Edited)

CI. Prodding the Beast- Iceland and SuFin

Iceland hadn't wanted to get involved with the whole dispute over Hans Island.

Unfortunately, he was now guilty by association.

Iceland rolled out of bed, changing out of his pajama sweater, and into a daytime sweater, before he made his way downstairs.

"Mr. Puffin, what are you wanting for breakfast?" He asked as he opened the fridge. He waited for an answer, but none came. "Mr. Puffin?"

"Help me!" The gruff voice of the puffin called out, and Iceland looked back behind him, quickly realizing the sound was coming from the living room. He ran into the room, coming face to face with Hong Kong.

Instantly, his face was red. "Wha- what are you doing here?"

"Hello Icy." Hong Kong smiled. "You're bed head is pretty adorable."

Behind the Asian country, the Nordic could see his puffin locked in a cage behind him.

"Loung! Why is my puffin in a cage?" He demanded, "Did you have anything to do with this?"

"No... And yes." Hong Kong shrugged. "A couple of Sammi's friends said all I had to do was a hold a key until you admitted you're undying love you to me."

Iceland's cheeks turned impossibly redder. "I do not love you!"

"That is certainly an issue for your puffin, now isn't it?" Hong Kong smiled. "Oh, I forgot, this is for you." Hong Kong placed a American flag sticker on Iceland's cheek before walking over and taking a a seat of Iceland's couch, clicking on the TV, "What should we watch? I'm thinking a nice to romcom?"

"I have never been so ready to die." Iceland whispered, burying his face into his hands.

Meanwhile, a little ways across the Atlantic Ocean, two of the other Nordics were waking up to a... Similar situation?

Well, it was similar because there was a cage involved.

And they were in it.

"Sve, wake up!" Finland shouted, shaking the Swede's shoulder furiously. The taller man grunted, opening his eyes and sitting up, reaching for his glasses on his night stand, only to find cold metal bars.

"Wh't's this?" He asked gruffly. He was shirtless with blue and yellow plaid pajama pants, while Finland wore a pale blue silk sleeping outfit with fluffy pink slippers on his feet.

"Surprise you gits!" A high pitched voice cheered outside, and both adults looked over to see (more or less) Sealand standing mockingly outside their prison.

"Sealand! Thank the stars, quick, find a key for this cage!" Finland commanded desperately.

"What? You mean like this key?" Sealand pulled a glistening gold key out of his pocket.

"Yes, like that one! Quick, unlock us!"

"No! Those two Americans were right! This is way too much fun!" Sealand laughed. "You two look ridiculous in there!"

"Peter please! What about breakfast?"

"I am old enough to make my own food, you ninnies! Now where did I put that to-do list they gave me- ah! Here it is!" Sealand picked it up off the IKEA coffee table and read over it quickly.

He smiled, then walked up to the cage, looking Sweden dead in the eyes. "You. You are not... my father." He said in a deep, dramatic tone.

Finland gasped. "Don't say such things to him, Sealand. Where are your manners?"

"I have my manners, I just have them set aside for now." Sealand explained.

Finland glanced over at his partner, and his violet eyes widened in horror as tear rolled down Sweden's face (although his expression remained utterly unchanged). "Sealand! You have upset Sweden! Apologize this instant!"

"Oh, if you think he's upset, just wait till you see this, Tino!" The young "country" smiled, before running over to the curtains and throwing them open.

Finland screamed at the Hell depicted before him.

In the middle of his yard, up in flames, causing the snow around it to melt, was his sleigh.

"NO! Christmas is in a month! Have these people no heart?" Finland cried, holding onto the bars and shaking them in a desperate attempt to get to his sleigh.

"Yeah, I have to admit, the girl with the big nose did start crying when she was covering the sled with lighter fluid. The Asian one had to light it." Sealand informed them. "Americans are mean. But I kind of like it. As long as they're not mean to me."

"This is what we get for helping Denmark." Finland sobbed, burying his face into Sweden's shoulder. "Doing so always comes back to bite us!"

"Oh, by the way! They a asked to give you these!" Sealand reached into the cage, slapping each one square in the nose, leaving an American flag sticker. "Now you really look ridiculous."