Our Lost Faith| TaeKook

Chapter 31

(Past Timeline)

(sometimes sweet before the storm)

"Hey, you up" Taehyungs walks into his room where Jungkook was sleeping next to Yeonjun. Jungkook leans against the hardboard and watches Taehyung coming towards him.

"Sorry for last night" Jungkook apologizes for bothering Taehyung with his shit.

Taehyung smiles a little and sits at the edge of the bed. The two eyes met for a second but Taehyungs looked down. Yeonjun climbs onto Jungkook and makes himself comfortable in his lab and rests his head against his chest. Both Taehyung and Jungkook smiled at the toddler's cuteness.

"What happened last night?" Taehyung hesitantly asks looking up at Jungkook and thinking he shouldn't have asked when the smiles on his face disappeared.

"Just coming to realize things about myself," Jungkook said, patting Yeonjun's back warmly. Taehyung frowned at Jungkook's words and Jungkook chuckled.

"How am I to say right? Do you probably know how shitty of a person I am? After all, every hardship in your life is caused by me." Taehyung listens to every word Jungkook says and he feels his heart pounding knowing there is a conversation going on.

"It truly feels like my life keeps coming to a stop at the very point I run from. It feels so sickening to know that no matter how much I try to change myself.....I will never be anything more than a monster" Jungkook doesn't look at Taehyung, he doesn't want to see any signs of agreement that he is just that.

"I don't even know if I have the right to even be crying about my disappointments to you out of all the people.....it seems ironic" Jungkook chuckles with a sniff and Taehyung bites his lips.

"I didn't say anything.....just because it's me instead of someone else doesn't mean you aren't allowed to show your pain" Taehyung whispered, placing his hands over Jungkook.

Jungkook stares at Taehyung's hands and back at him "you shouldn't be good to someone like me" he said. "It looks pitiful".

"I am not good to you because I pity you Jungkook...I haven't reached that high yet. I care about you, that's why I am good to you" Taehyung said without realizing how heavy his words were on Jungkook.

"Why do you care about Taehyung?...... Did you forget what I have done? Shouldn't you hate me?" Jungkook's eyes teared in frustration.

"That one thing I never learned.....is to hate you" Taehyung smiled but his inside crumbled.

It was true that Taehyung actually would never hate Jungkook. Even though Jungkook did that to him he wasn't able to hate him. He tried. He never understood that side of him, Jungkook had become his nightmare, his reason for trauma. But he never felt those haters towards him and he simply didn't have a reason for it.

Jungkook's heart dropped, he felt so enervated because of the words Taehyung was speaking to him. Why does Taehyung have to be so nice to him? It would have been less exhausting if Taehyung just hated him, and told him how big of a monster he was....but of course, he doesn't.

"What happened between us wasn't something we both could go back and change so don't keep holding onto it. We didn't have control over them, and we don't know either. Our past isn't something we can keep on holding to cause it won't let us move forward." Taehyung says and feels tinglings when Jungkook touches his face.

"There is no need to try so hard because we walk a difficult path there is no point trying to go back. We aren't given much choice but to keep on walking, ''Taehyung whispered as their forehead connects.