Fighting Fate

76. You Are My Sunshine

"She's crying, I've done something wrong." Zayn hands London back to me after holding her for some time. 

"No, you haven't. She was asleep for a couple of hours. She's due for a feed now." My boobs were leaking so it is good timing that she woke now. Zayn and Harry go upstairs to check out the nursery while I feed London downstairs. 

I stare down at my beautiful girl who has her little hand on my chest. Her big blue eyes stare up at the ceiling. 

"I never knew I could feel this type of love for someone." I say to her. "You are everything I ever wanted, plus more London Anne Styles. Thank you for making me a Mummy."

She lets out a little grunt while still feeding from me. I love the tiny noises she makes. Even when it is just to push out a big poo. She has the cutest poo face. 

"You know, you have your Daddy wrapped around your little finger already. He is never going to let anything bad happen to you. I can promise you that because he's never let anything bad happen to me. Although, I think you've stolen my crown. I'm not his favourite girl anymore." I laugh. "But I don't blame him because you are way too cute." London's eyes meet my face. "Yes you are. Too damn cute."

I gently rock her side to side and think of the song my Mum used to sing to me when I was young. 

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
You make me happy when skies are gray.
You'll never know, dear. How much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away."

"The other night dear, as I lay sleeping. I dreamt I held you in my arms. And now that you're here, my dreams are waking. And I will keep you far from all harm."

London's eyes slowly close before opening again wearily. She is getting sleepy again. 

*

Zayn is making final touches on the nursery, London is asleep again and Harry and I are sitting in the lounge room watching her. She fell asleep in my arms and Harry joined me by my side. I lean into him and rest my head against his shoulder while he places his arm around me. 

"We've come so far."

"Hmm?" 

"You and I." He says to me. "We met as kids at the age of 11."

"At my Grandma's bakery." I add to the story. 

"I was captivated by you from the moment I first laid eyes on you."

"Meanwhile I was captivated ... actually, angered by your choice of sweet."

Harry laughs. "A chocolate croissant."

"Then when you found out they were my favourite, you made it your mission to come to the bakery every day and buy them all."

"What a little prick."

We both laugh. 

"We became best friends. Every year when I would visit the UK and spend three months with my Grandma, I spent every single day with you."

"From our awkward first kiss in the garden when we were thirteen."

"To falling in love at the age of nineteen."

"Losing sight of each other a little while after that because of our careers."

"But never losing any love."

He nods his head in agreement. "Not once did I ever question my love for you. I hate myself for not being able to make things work, but we found our way back to each other." He looks at London. "Thanks to you."

"Do you think we would be together if I hadn't fallen pregnant?"

Harry frowns at me. "Why would you ask me that?"

"It's a serious question."

He lets out a sigh. "Honestly, yeah. Maybe not so soon. But we 

I smile while nodding in agreement. "You can't fight fate."

"Exactly right." He places his head on top of mine and we sit like this for a moment before Harry speaks again. "I love you with my whole heart Hailey Hayes." He picks up my hand and caresses my lower ring finger on my left hand. My heart skips a beat because I feel like he might propose to me. I laugh internally when I realise that I am overthinking this. 

"I can feel the pulse on your neck." Harry laughs. "Don't worry, I'm not going to yet. But I will."

"It's no rush. I know that everyone is asking about it. Now that we have a baby, they expect us to be married in the next year. But I am content right now. Of course one day I will love to be your wife, but for now I am so happy with you and London just as we are."

"Thanks baby. I'm happy with that too."

"Do you think we should post to Instagram about London?"

"I was thinking about that too. I actually chose the photo." 

He removes his arm from around me and reaches over to the other end of the lounge for his phone. Harry picks up his phone and goes into his camera roll. He shows me a picture that he took of the three of our hands. His hand is on London's stomach, while my hand is on top of his and she is gripping onto my finger. 

"I'm going to change it to black and white." Harry opens the effects option and changes the colour of the image. "Like that." He looks at me, awaiting my opinion.

I nod my head and zoom into the picture. "It's a yes from me. I love that one."

Harry gets my phone for me and we both prepare the image. We both wait for the approvals from our managers before posting the picture. 

Heather replies to me first with a thumbs up. A few minutes later, Harry is given the approval too. 

"Ready?" He asks me while his thumb hovers over the post button. 

I am so nervous. I take a deep breath to calm myself down. "Yeah. 3, 2, 1." We both post it at the same time. 

"Stupid internet, how come yours is uploading faster than mine?"

My photo posts meanwhile Harry's is halfway through loading. Ten seconds later, Harry's photo posts and thousands of likes immediately come through. I refresh my screen and see that I already have over 47,000 likes and 9, 000 comments. They continue to multiply each time I refresh. 

We didn't reveal her name or name or the date she was born. We simply captioned the photo:

Welcome to the world baby girl. Our hearts are so full. We love you.