Thorny Reviews | REVIEW SHOP [CLOSED]

《Rose》A Fairytale in the Making

Reviewer: therosepoetk

A Fairytale in the Making by Vakhaha (Vakhaha)

So I like how your title is suggestive in that way the reader gets a glimpse of what the story will be about. It’s catchy and creative, and I think it suits your tale well. I think you could do a little work on your cover, as I wouldn’t say it’s too relative. But it’s pretty okay, and I’m already invested in what your writing holds. Your blurb is sort of generic, so I’d like to add more detail into it, but I like how you already looked over the plot and gave the readers a good idea of what they should expect. Your opening is good, but it would be a little better if you could start off with an action fuelled scene, or one where a certain scene is described. But I like your plot though, and how it all pieces together as the chapters pass on. I really love how you named the chapters, it’s a great use of alliteration and very admirable. I also like your characters, and how their thoughts and ideas are clearly expressed. Something I’d like you to change is how you bolded the dialogue - usual in a grammatical sense, italic dialogue is for thoughts, regular font dialogue is for speech. I’ve never really seen bolded dialogue before, but if you’d like to keep that, it’s your choice. I’d like you to touch up your grammar a bit, but on the other hand, your flow is great and I see a ton of potential for this story. Your emotional appeal is also really nice, and I’m looking forward to more of your writing. Keep up the rocking work Vakhaha!