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《Rose》The Twist of Melody's Life

Reviewer: therosepoetk 

The Twist of Melody's Life by Melodeight 

So first of all, I really like your title. It's intriguing, and it makes me want to know what the twist of Melody's life actually is. Splendid title. I just want you to redo the cover because I see a lot of visual components that don't make a lot of sense. The title and even your name are so unfocused on the cover, and I don't really see how the image connects to the story. But aside from that, your blurb. There are a few grammatical errors, but I like the way you started it off. It's a unique concept for a character and narrator to communicate, so I thought that was pretty cool. Your opening was a little lackluster. I think this is because I read the blurb and then the opening, and I guess I just didn't see the differentiating scenery I was expecting. Your plot is pretty interesting as it progresses though, and I really like how we get introductions to each of the characters based on the roles that they play in Melody's life. The emotional appeal is great because you focused all that energy on one character, so if you could spread that out a bit it could really make the story pop. Your character development was also amazing, as we see how they all grow to face their fears and build better relationships amongst themselves. Awesome work. The clarity is also nice and smooth, but an online editor could help. In summary, great story, fabulous writing style, and I see a bright future for you as an author. Superb work, Melodeight!