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《Samantha》Lost Eden

Lost Eden by Bluelovesleep

Reviewer: samantha-writes

Cover: 5/5
- My gosh, the cover is absolutely stunning! Novel_Worm did an amazing job! It's probably up there on the list of the best covers I've seen on Wattpad. I just love how it looks so much!
- Not only that, but it's very fitting to the story. The character on the cover looks how I imagine Krista to look based on her descriptions throughout the story, the symbols work together and towards the style of the story, and the text that reads "The Half-Blooded Child" fits the main conflict.
- Some of the text at the bottom is hard to read even with my (*flicks hair*) amazing eyesight, but that's my only complaint. Plus, it isn't a big deal because if it was an actual published story, the cover would be much larger and easier to read, so it's all good.

Title: 4/5
- I had to look up what Eden was (although I felt like I should've known beforehand), and I found that it's basically a sort of paradise? Anyway, it's pretty fitting to the story considering their paradise is, in fact, lost because of the chaos and violence. So it's fairly fitting to the story's overall concept, but it could be more accurate to the main conflict. The subtitle on the cover, "The Half-Blooded Child," is a lot more fitting to the main conflict-despite probably being a commonly-used title-so I'd prefer it to "Lost Eden," but I'm okay with the current title.
- It would be too much effort to change the entire cover too since the current cover is so perfect, so don't even bother changing it. It's honestly still a great title, I'm just picky as heck (gotta make these reviews PG lol).

Blurb: 7/10
- The blurb is a lot longer than I think is necessary. There's a lot of world-building and backstory-explaining (that's a word, for sure) within it, which can be a bit much for new readers. It can do something called "info-dumping," where-well, it's pretty self-explanatory-too much information is dumped onto the readers all at once, and it can leave them being overwhelmed. I recommend that you reduce this.
- On the other hand, the main conflict is so subtly mentioned. It wouldn't bother me as much if the exposition wasn't so in-depth here, but because it is, the introduction of the main conflict feels lackluster. It does make for a good hook, though.
- Good introduction of characters, though. I like the subtle backstories and descriptions. Not too in-depth and not too vague. Great job on that!

World: 9/10
- Sheeeesh, the world-building in the story is really incredible! The location of the London, UK is very clearly established, and the later introduced location of Lillie, France is also provided nicely.
- The way the orphanage is described and the orphans' daily lives there is amazing! There's so much detail that I feel like I understand what it's like to live there.
- Similarly to the blurb, there is a bit too much world-building when it comes to the orphanage. Readers learn a lot about life there, which is good, but it's thrown at them all at once. Again, that's info-dumping, and that's a good way to scare off readers. You're not too bad about it, though, so you get a pass. Just keep in mind that readers don't need to know everything about life at the orphanage, just the basics at first and any additional details about the daily life can be squeezed in later on in the story.

Plot: 15/20
- The exposition does a good job of introducing the situation, world, characters, etc., but it is probably too long. The extensive world-building is a contributing factor to this. Just keep in mind that the readers should learn about the main characters' daily lives, but it shouldn't be at the cost of the audience's interest. I hope that makes sense. I feel like that doesn't make sense lol. Lemme know if it doesn't. Not a big deal, though. It just felt like it took me a while to get to the meat of the story.
- I though at first that the main conflict was that the Immortal-things were attacking everyone, but I soon realized that wasn't the case. That was just the story concept and the backstory. The main conflict, however, is that the creatures are searching orphanages for the half-blooded child, which is obviously Krista. Maybe I'm wrong and I look like an idiot, but oh well. I really like this main conflict. The concept of the creatures attacking everyone isn't the most unique, although I do like it, but I really like the idea of them searching for her. It has so much potential, and I'm living for it!