《Rose》My Unsubmissive Girl

29 5 6
                                    

Reviewer: therosepoetk

My Unsubmissive Girl by ShellynMusca

I really like your title, to start this review off. I like how it already introduces the protagonist as a leading lady, which gives more insight into what your story is about. I think that the word "unsubmissive" is quite unclear on how it resonates with the theme here, but I'm sort of drawing the connection between "submissive" and "boxing". I also adore the cover, because I really appreciate you bringing an authentic image of a strong black woman to light. Bravo.

I just think your blurb could use some grammatical editing, I suggest Hemingway Editor, a stupendous website. Other than that, the structure is good, and I'm nicely introduced to Marie and her life. I think since you are writing about a boxer, you can add more detail about her fights, how Marie is feeling, things like that. But I like the plot and how it progresses smoothly, as well as how all your characters interact with one another. The emotional appeal is stunning because of how you chose to incorporate black culture, and I can see that it means a lot to you. The only suggestion I have about this is to keep your parts all flowing smoothly - which means, don't stop the story. Keep your images and text all relevant to the story, and find a way to fit in your black culture education in the plot itself.

I love the character development and how they all grow, and I just really need you to work on your grammar to polish it all up. Overall, great work, original writing style, and powerful message that you are sending out to your readers. Keep up the eye opening work Sheila!

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