Nothing To Give But Love (A Michael Jackson Story)

Chapter 43- Defiance

Chapter 43

Michael's POV

My heart nearly shatters when I hear Alondra shout on the other side of the door.

"What are you hiding?"

I'm not heartless, I just don't know where my heart is. With her? A part of it.

But I'm not lying. I'm on my way to the studio and Frank called me yesterday to tell me that I can't be distracted. I need to get back to my music, I've missed it.

What I'm avoiding to tell Alondra is where I'm going after I leave the studio. I feel terrible, but how else will I fix this?

I meet Bill downstairs. "Good morning."

I guess I sound a little grumpy because he then asks, "Is something going on?"

He and I have a close relationship. Bill is like a father figure to me and I barely keep anything away from him.

So I tell him. I tell him everything, about how I feel while he listens closely.

After a minute, he shakes his head. "That's a pickle to be in. But just remember not to hurt Alondra. She's been through enough pain," he advices.

"I know that," I groan, hiding my face in my hands. He gives me a pat on the back.

"You'll do the right thing, you always do."

"Thanks, Bill." I exhale and uncover my face.

"No problem. To the studio?" I nod and we leave Neverland.

--

I feel empty. Weak, and addled. Maybe I'm overthinking this whole thing.

I keep repeating to myself: Michael isn't like that. He's not that kind of person. But what if he is? I don't know about his past love life at all. I don't even know if he had dated Tatiana.

I turn over in bed when the landline starts ringing. "Yeah?" I answer drably.

"Hey Alondra," Janet's voice comes through and I sit up, clearing my throat.

"Hey girl, what's up?"

She giggles sadly. "Just worried about you and Mike. Listen, I heard about what happened..."

Yeah, along with the rest of the world.

I slump my shoulders and nod, but then realize she can't see me. "Oh, yeah."

"I'm sorry hun."

I shrug, and when I want to reply, my voice gives out and cracks. "Its fine, it's not your fault Jan."

"Aww girl, is there something else going on?"

I feel wetness group together in my eyes, thinking about how Michael is keeping things private from me.

When I don't answer, and all I do is sniffle into the headset, Janet speaks.

"Do you want me to come over?"

"Yes, please," I say graciously.

"Okay. I'll be there in a few Lonnie." My smile is ailing at the silly nickname I've earned.

We hang up and I then loll back on the bed for almost an hour. My head is swimming when there's a soft knock on my door.

A head pokes around it. James. "Miss Cade, Janet Jackson is here to see you."

"Send her in, and please call me Alondra."

He nods and then some seconds later, Janet slips through the door.