Nothing To Give But Love (A Michael Jackson Story)

Chapter 18- New and Old Faces

Chapter 18

Throughout the night, I can't sleep. My mind keeps going back to the activities Michael and I indulged in just hours before.

It was so heated and passionate. He just melted away my fears and I didn't even feel scared anymore. The way he touched me, his kisses, his body.. it all just sent me away! I know he was my first, but it must be impossible to get better than him.

I loved the way he didn't force me to do anything out of my comfort zone. Although I was a bit reluctant at first, he helped me through it. I learned that it was something I wanted to do, I was only confused by how fast it came.

Though it didn't take away all of my fears, my heart is aching for the next time we might do this again.

I also keep thinking about that three word sentence that makes my heart skip a beat.

"I love you."

Had it come from anyone else's mouth, I wouldn't give it a second thought. The phrase was thrown around so carelessly that some don't understand what love truly is. But Michael? I try to convince myself that it must be true. That he really does love me. Had he not loved me, he wouldn't have done this. Took me in, nursed me, cared for me so deeply.

But how? He hasn't known me for all his life, just a little over a month. I barely even remember what life was like beforehand. And what about all of his past lovers? Tatum, Brooke, Diana, Tatiana.. I'm sure that they're still somewhere around. I can't even be compared to their fame and looks! Its baffling why Michael would choose me over all the beautiful showbiz stars out there.

I'm still trying to figure things out for myself. Who I am, where I'm going, and where I'll be a couple years from now.

My mother always told me, "Be a strong woman who can fight for herself. You don't need no man!" She would say.

I realize that what she said couldn't be more right. I don't want to be known as just Michael's lover. I want to be known as Alondra Cade, to make a name for myself. Nothing can overshadow that.

I'm so ecstatic that I have a chance to start over by Michael sending me to college. I can finally pursue what I want. At this moment, nothing can stop me.

But all of this at once is a lot to deal with. Michael and I aren't even a couple, but it's inevitable and will happen soon because I know his heart is in the right place.

I don't even know if I love him yet! He certainly loves me and I like him, more than anything. He's sweet, beautiful, smart, caring, and Lord is he the best in bed! I just need to focus on what I want, and everything else will fall into place, I hope.

I continue to toss and turn before I feel a hand on my shoulder, Michael's. I crack open my eyes and yawn before turning to him.

"Hey," He says shortly before I receive a kiss on the forehead.

"Hey," I say with a smile. He wraps his arm around me and sighs.

"I've got to get up," He says. I groan and slip lower under the covers.

"Why? We should just stay in bed." I reply tiredly. I hadn't gotten any shut-eye.

"I wish, but I have an important meeting to get to. You can stay if you'd like."

I pout and he giggles before stretching.

"Oh, it's no fun being alone. Could I come along? It'll be boring around here anyway." I reply. But Michael immediately shakes his head.

"No sweetheart, it's a very important matter. What if Kristen and James take you to the University campus to look around? You are starting tomorrow, you know." He says.