Yunho didn't know what he felt worse about... The fact that he'd been stuck in ED for seven and a half hours, or the fact that somewhere along the line, his parents had been called, despite him being a legal adult, with absolutely no legal obligation to have his parents present.
He felt that maybe he would have rathered Mr. Kwang punch him a bit harder and give him a real concussion, and a real reason for his parents to be present.
Then he wouldn't have to listen to the constant condescending dribble over responsibility, and how to take care of himself.
'You know a hospital is no place for violence, Yunho.'
'Mother, I didn't provoke him-'
'Yunho look at yourself! How do you think your father and I felt, getting a call at work that our son is in hospital, as a patient?'
He felt an incredible irritation hit him as once again, he was not being listened to, nor, as it so seemed, believed.
'You think I brought this upon myself, don't you?' he said in disbelief, staring at the two sitting on chairs beside the bed. With his own legs crossed leaning against the head of the bed, he couldn't have felt less deserving to be taking up a patient bay. 'You think I stirred him up, don't you?'
His parents glanced at each other, before his father spoke for them. 'We have noticed that you have been exhibiting quite a lot of anger lately. Which is perfectly normal for you to feel. It is just a part of growing up-'
He laughed spitefully, poking his tongue into the inside of his cheek. 'Anger?' He scoffed. 'The only thing that is making me angry, is the fact that I seem to be talking to a brick wall. I can't believe you think I knowingly brought this upon myself.'
'Yunho,' his father snapped. 'That is no way to speak to your parents.'
Sighing, he shook his head, giving in. Rubbing his face with his hands, he winced a little as he touched the light bruise on his cheek.
But raking his fingers through his hair, he could do nothing but just take it. He felt powerless, and he felt pained.
'Yunho,' his mother said. 'Darling, it doesn't matter how this happened. This hospital, is a place of healing. I shouldn't have to tell you how important it is to keep it that way.'
He felt like crying. 'I know tha-'
'Then why is it that you keep finding yourself in trouble? Yunho only a couple weeks ago you came home with that wound on your neck, and now here we are again. Students can go their entire educational career without encountering anything of this nature. So how is it that you are tallying confrontations? It's almost as though you're drawn to it-'
Hearing his mother say those things... Things about events he'd had absolutely zero control over...
It was the last straw.
Tears pricked in his eyes and fell within seconds. 'I can't do this anymore,' he choked, reaching up and wiping his eyes. 'I love medicine. I love helping people. I love it,' he breathed, feeling his heart ache.
'But I hate it. I love it, and I hate it, and it hurts, okay? It hurts to be going back and forth, constantly. I feel whiplashed.
You say I'm drawn to the bad things that happen in this hospital, but I have tried so hard to keep my head down and just get through my prac. I don't want the bullshit politics, or the paperwork, or the lawsuits, or anything.'
He choked on a wave of tears as his chest ached. 'I just wanted to do my job, and do it well...' he whispered.
'I love medicine. I love it so fucking much, but I can't do this anymore. Things keep happening, making me hate it, and I'm tired. I'm so fucking tired...'
His parents stared at him, and he hated that as they saw him cry and pour his heart out to them, instead of comforting him, they sat still, analysing him like a fucking patient.
'All the signs... God there's been so many... Do you know how many times I've sat at the bar with San, telling him how badly I want out? Years. For years I've struggled with loving it, and hating it.
But I'm too fucking thick to catch on that maybe this isn't what I'm supposed to do.
So the world showed me, why I hate it, right in front of my eyes, in the form of a hospital that had chased my own parents out for being honest, respectable doctors.
But even then, I was still too thick to take the hint.
And so I was shown privy to malpractice, I was stabbed in the neck, and now I've been punched in the face in the fucking corridor. I coughed up blood. Have you ever coughed up blood? Hmm? Do you know what it feels like? Tastes like?
I was attacked, and all I fucking want to do! Is to help people!'
Tears falling even heavier now and his voice growing in volume as he became more worked up... He was sure he was disturbing the people on the outside of the curtain bay, and the dead silence from outside with the exception of infusion pumps beeping, told him he was right.
But he just couldn't stop his tears, and the more he stared at his parents, wishing they would stand up and at least touch his arm, and comfort him...
It only made it worse, and made him hate medicine all the more.
'I can't do this anymore,' he sniffed, giving up on using his hands to swipe away tears and using his rolled up shirt sleeve at the elbow instead.
His mother leant forward, shaking her head. 'No you don't meant that darling. You love it here...'
'Ooooh my god- Mother! You're still not listening to me! I'm in pain! Can't you see?!'
'Darling if you're in pain, then we can get you some analgesia-'
He groaned. 'Oh for god sake- For once in your life, can you take your fucking doctor hats off and just look at me, as your son?! You made me, so it's the least you can fucking do!'
He stared at his parents' blank faces, and as he saw them both speechless, the sad reality hit him like a bullet to the heart. 'You can't... Can you?... You don't know how to...'
His chest suddenly pulled, agonisingly, and suddenly, he could barely breathe. He felt claustrophobic for the first time in his life, and suddenly, he would have preferred to be having a tea party with Mr. Kwang, than sitting in a confined space with his parents. They had gone within an instant, to the people he loved in a distant kind of fashion, to the two people he wanted to see the least on the entire planet.
Getting off of the bed, he grabbed his coat from the chair and pulled it on, wincing a little as his side tugged.
'Yunho... Where are you going?' his mother asked, and it hurt to hear that her voice was suddenly more gentle... Even if just marginally...
'Anywhere away from you two. The further the better.'
Pulling on his shoes, he swiped away his tears, only more saddened by the way his neck ached painfully as he did.
But as he went to leave, his mother suddenly shot to stand up. Perhaps she might have gone to him, if not for the fact that his father was sitting on the chair in her way.
Or perhaps that was just wishful thinking.
'Yunho, darling... Stay, we can talk...'
Those words hurt more than anything she'd said all night.
And so as he pulled the curtain aside, he looked down over his shoulder, pained to speak the words he felt were ingrained in his soul.
'What's the point? You never listen anyway.'
~~~
A/N: As much as I am dying to post the next chapter, sadly, I have to refrain to 1 a day 😫
we are literally only 14 chapters out from the finale, and i've written sweet all (lmao surprisingly 14 chapters again) in season 3. I'm desperately trying to finish shadows, so unfortunately (lmao probably just for me, u lot probs dc 🤣) I have to exercise ✨restraint✨
Sorryyyyy!!!!!
🥺👉👈