Aurora's POV
Slowly my body was beginning to feel and recognize all of my five senses.
Starting with the most vital function of my body was maintaining my breathing.
My lungs were expanding and releasing providing me the ability to breathe causing the rest of my functions to awoken like sleeping beauty from her sleep, but once oxygen was consumed in my bloodstream everything else went south.
The first sense I was comprehending other than smelling was my taste.
My entire mouth was parched and dry like a desert causing my tongue to shrink and shrivel up like a prune. I was far beyond dehydrated and I thirst for water the simple compound of two hydrogen bonds and one oxygen bond....
As goes for my hearing, the only thing that echoed through my ears were quiet muffles, not even able to recognize or understand who was speaking or determine if it was male or female. It was all very vague and quiet like morning fog scattered around the forest.....
Once these two feelings started to arouse in my blood it caused my eyes to join the rest of my necessary functions.
My eyelids slowly start to rise like yeast in bread dough but as my green eyes revealed its beauty all I got in return was blurriness and the intense rays of the sun obscuring my vision even more......
Lastly, the worst sense of them all came into play....
My body had acknowledged the four main components of a human's senses but it left the fifth and final sense to come into play making it the most extreme one......feeling.
Starting from my head reaching to my toes, I felt pain being ruptured throughout my entire veins as though someone had loosened and torn each induvial cell in my body. My muscles felt as dead and immobilize as a piece of raw meat but the pain was a feeling so severe and devastating it felt like a meat grinder revolving its wheels against my flesh. My joints felt like they had been disarranged and spun with like whisking and breaking a raw egg making it incapable for me to move.
Every single possible organ, tissue,and ligament were drained with exhaustion and filled with weakness, but the gravest anguish of them all was inflaming in my right forearm.
I thought period cramps were the possible feeling a girl could experience....I was wrong.
This feeling in my forearm was brutal, and the words to describe it were inexplicable. The best reference I can give is to you is this.
A mad man has cut underneath your left breast where your heart rests, and with his bare hands and long sharp fingers, he inserts his hand towards your open flesh, digging his pointy claws into your organ squeezing the tissue strongly as his grip against you only worsens. With a hand groping your beating heart using all he's strength he begins to pull out your tender organ from it's arteries and veins tearing and breaking apart any strains or connection it had to your body to be then transported onto a plate where the feeling had just begun. Still able to function without a heart your body cries with pain yearning for the most vital organ, but worst of all that hand begins to torment your flesh by ripping the tissues of your heart's using a knife wanting to hear you scream in agony and pain.....
The moment I felt my body surge with such intense feelings immediately I grasped my surroundings synchronizing the area.
I was lying flat on my back in a cot in the Survey Corp infirmary room, having aided towards my left the love of my life, and the other way was Dr.Nightengale......
I was fully awake now and functioning, and my head suffered from an instant throbbing sensation pounding my head like a hammer blunting my skull.
"MMHHHMMM!' I whimper, consumed with so pain that was contracting in my forearm.....
Erwin immediately heard my cry like a whistle calling a stallion as he rushed to my left side like a magnet, his hand slithering into mine to grip it tightly.
"Aurora, my love!" he cried with a worried look, his dazzling blue eyes softened like a pillow as his thick blonde eyebrows were lowered like a rock into sand.
The moment my left hand was connected with Erwin's smooth and bare skin some of the blistering sensations swelling in my forearm seemed to have declined, even more so when I managed to roll my head towards my left side my eyes gaze upon the man who brings light into my life.
My eyes begin to soak up his long handsome face. Though his facial expression bore worry and concern, but what nearly made all those brutal sensations transition into butterflies fluttering in my belly was getting the chance to gaze into his stunning sapphire blue eyes.
Erwin....my love
"Erwin..." I cried with a smile gaining so much energy and comfort from his image along with his touch. "Your alive, my love..."
Instantly Erwin's anxious expression twirled into a loving smile releasing a cry of joy, as he raised my left hand closer to his lips to gently press his lips against my palm bestowing true love's kiss.
Feeling his tender lips rub against my skin had made all the pain go away like placing a bandaid on an open cut. Just the mere sight and a gentle kiss could solve all my problems and fix everything......for a second.
Again my forearm shot another painful sensation indicating how injured my arm was feeling as though a thick knife had been plunged into my skin.
Dr.Nightengale, quickly stepped into the scene seeing as though I had regained consciousness and knew she could begin what she was trained to do.
"Miss.Sinclair." said Clara with a stern but calming look, immediately grasping my attention to neglect the sensations tormenting my brain.
"Listen closely about what's going to happen the next hour or so." she rationally explained expressing no worry as she begun to slip on some rubber gloves that reached her elbows.
Though my body was strained with severe pain and mildly that pain was reduced from the sight of Erwin's complexion, but I had my full attention on the doctor, biting my tongue not to release any more whimpers because if I wanted this pain to be healed I had to listen and follow her directions like a little school girl learning how to put her hair in a ponytail.
"Erwin had informed me that he suspects that your arm is broken, and judging by the purple pigmentation indicates swelling along with the sudden expand in your forearm, I can assume that this is so." Clara reasonably explained now grabbing a small but sharp pointed knife the ones that are used to pull fruits. "Now since it's been an hour since the injury and your entire forearm is nearly purple I can not narrow where the accident may have occurred."
Clara paused noticing a male had aided her side too wearing a white coat and gloves as she handed him what looked like a normal pair of scissors, but these were much thinner and it had extra tools attached to it such as a utensil that once opening the pair of scissors it would remain apart.....
Clara then calmly returned to explain what the procedures will be taken.
"With that being said Aurora, I have no other choice but having to cut your entire forearm open." she bluntly admitted now handing her assistant another small tool thin and precise but this time it was thin down till about the remaining two inches of the stick. It was in the shape of a square but at each end, it had two sets of sharp points almost reminding me of a pitchfork but it's tips were much bulkier and thicker.
Already I was enduring so much, and in all honesty, I wanted to cry a river of sorrow just how much pain kept sizzling and throbbing in my nerves, but I knew if I wanted Clara to focus correctly and make things easier for her to focus on the procedure, I had to keep my moans and screams in.
Cold sweat was starting to slide down my spine feeling like a snake slithering down a tree, I was intimidated by how much more pain I will be going through, but my determination was much stronger.
I fully understand.....and she's kind enough to work on me, the least I can do is make things easier.
"Yes ma'am, I fully understand"
Clara nodded her head pleased by my kind response, and lastly, before starting the surgery, she grabbed a wooden spoon from her supply table breathing one last word.
"I'm being honest with you dear, this surgery is gonna be painful," she admitted as she reached over my body to hand Erwin the spoon. "Here Mr.Smith, Miss.Sinclair is gonna need this." she responded still wearing such a neutral look.
The truth didn't frighten me nor scare me, at this moment I would do whatever it takes to make this pain go away....not to mention if I ever want to use my arm again I have to bite through the pain and go through it.....
Erwin nodded his head understanding and already knowing this would be the next step, as he reached to grab the spoon to then levitate the wood to be inserted in between my teeth in a side angle as though I was a puppy retrieving a stick....
Erwin's masculine long face was locked with mine for a moment giving me the chance to gaze and cherish on his handsome appearance......
I can do this.....
Erwin's by my side, and if I ever want my hand to stroke his creamy cheek or brush my fingers through his blonde locks I have to fight this.
Erwin's hand and the spoon were floating inches away from my lips, and once his blue eyes connected with mine I felt energy and stamina replenish my veins.
For Erwin, the love of my life....
I broke my lips apart allowing Erwin to insert the wood in between my bottom and top teeth as I bite down into the rough material balancing it like a good girl....
Not a moment longer was wasted as Clara then transitioned her attention towards my injury...
My right hand was propped on a metal table laying face up...
Clara lowered the knife towards my skin as she dived the tip right into my bare flesh as strongly as she could piercing my entire skin with three layers of skin along with the muscles underneath.
I could feel the knife's tip begin to slice my flesh breaking open my skin like cutting a potato down the middle, but the worst part though was the movement. Given she was cutting three layers of skin and muscle tissue her progress of cutting down my forearm was nearly as slow as a snail...
The knife's tip slowly continued to cut open my flesh, causing instant pain to start rupturing throughout my entire body like ants flinging themselves on you but their mouths chewing your bare flesh.....
Feeling such a painful sensation spazz and torment me, my teeth clenched the wooden spoon strongly trying so hard not to squeal or whimper wanting every possible way to make this operation go smoothly.
Erwin noticed my sudden reaction as he tightens his grip around my hand trying to comfort me wearing such a calming smile and his face was so peaceful and relaxed because there is no doubt he would rather see his fiancé in misery than a corpse.....
"Aurora, my love" he smoothly spoke as calmly as a river. "Do you know your birthday is coming up?" he asked with a gentle look, as his other hand levitated to stroke my left cheek.
Clara continued to strongly slice my flesh open like peeling a banana making me so concentrated on the pain, but the moment I heard Erwin's masculine but yet handsome voice enter through my ear's I was glued to him like bears with honey.
My eyes drift onto his calming blue ones giving me instant comfort and ease to gaze upon his handsome face, like taking a nice warm relaxing bath after an intense day...
"You promised me that we would get married around your birthday...." he breathed ever so peacefully like a meadow. "Have you thought of a date?" he asked with a soft look, still feeling his hand gently stroke my skin up and down like a feather.
Once Erwin had finished his sentence, not only has Erwin's appearance distracted me from the open surgery but also took my concentration and mind away as well......because in all honestly, I was anxious for us to wed, but I haven't thought of a date.
Oh my....I haven't even thought of a day for the wedding!
My birthday is May thirteen, and even though how dreamily it sounds to get married on my birthday, I want our anniversary to be separate and have its unique day.....
My eyes continue to remain on his handsome and calming looking, causing my mind to twirl with all sorts of ideas about the day I've been dreaming ever since I realized males and females can become one.....
I like the number thirty-one, perhaps Erwin would too?
Clara finally had managed to split open my forearm, starting from my wrist cutting down to end at my elbow, leaving my muscles and skin to be exposed to fresh oxygen blowing against my flesh......
"Mmmmhhmm..." I whimper feeling the cool breeze strike my opening leaving my body to quiver from the unpleasant sensation rising back in my blood.
Promptly another medical professional had rushed to my side, aiding Clara and I, as he had no hesitation what comes next....
Momentarily the male assistant had grabbed those thin but precise scissors opening them up like a bottle of wine, separating the two blades as he jabbed each tip towards the opening of where my cut started. My wrist. Purging the tip through my flesh jabbing into my tender muscle.
Again he grabbed another pair of scissors and repeated the same motion of stabbing the scissors into my body, but this time he confined the position of the scissors to be rested in the middle of my forearm and the other stabbed close to my elbow. The reason why the assistant had to performed such gruesome works on my body, mainly due to stability. Three scissors were inserted in my body in a parallel line causing my tissue and muscles to be secured so that my flesh wouldn't shrivel up and start sinking in, instead it provided the stability and clearance from any other flesh to make contact with the bone......
Feeling the scissors sharp tip stab into my flesh like an arrow caused all those wonderful sensations from Erwin to be blown away like a dandelion, instead, it was transitioned into crucial pain which resorted into small whimpers as I bite down on my wooden spoon....
"Aurora, my love." Erwin said tightening his grip around my hand, comforting me greatly. "What day did you pick?" he asked with a gentle expression, his blue eyes calmly as water flowing down a waterfall.
Oh Erwin...yes of course my love.
Again hearing Erwin's smooth voice ring in my ear he managed to soak up all my pain like a sponge, causing me to refocus on our conversation.
Slowly and steady I remove my hand from our grip, as I bring my fingers to form the number three.
"May third?" he asked with a charming look his blue eyes dazzling like a sapphire and his lips parted open with delight...since it's finally happening.
I then slowly and surely transition my fingers now to motion a one.
Erwin's smile brightens like a lantern, and then quickly returned his hand back towards mine like a magnet, feeling his tender skin rub against mine.
"May thirty-first." he smiled pleasantly like the sun. "It's wonderful my darling." he smiled brightly and leaned his face closer to mine to briefly exchange a loving kiss on my cheek.
Oh Erwin.....I can't wait till that day comes.
I will be forever happy with you.
Feeling Erwin's tender lips kiss my cheek so sweetly like a strawberry, made all those tormenting sensations go away like medicine for a cold.....already I was feeling better...
The male assistant had finished holding up all my tissues and muscles through a sharp piece of metal object. Now the assistant's hands were occupied on a dry cloth his eyes still focused on my arm.
The assistant begin to dab the cloth and inserted it into my open wound cleaning and wiping any blood, inflammation, or liquid in general blocking his vision towards the bone.
Feeling the fabric's coarse material pat against my raw flesh I felt tingling and irritation swell in my veins causing me to bite down harder on my wooden spoon from the sensation. I then started to feel hot gooey saliva start to ooze from each corner of my mouth from the placement of the spoon and the need of not trying to whimper.....
Erwin noticed my sudden behavior passing such a soft look of pity, providing him no hesitation nor fear to open his mouth.
"Has she lost a lot of blood Dr.Nightenglae?" Erwin asked calmly still gripping onto my hand as my life depended on it....
The male assistant continued to damp the moist area with both of his hands trying to clear the scene to give a visual to the doctor.
From the intenseness of Erwin and I's grip, I could feel the heat being transmitted through our palms causing hot sweat to drip from my wrist along with staining in between my fingers, but this action only provided me how much Erwin cared about me, urging me to please him more with my love.
I can do this. I just have to be strong like Erwin and all my friends.
"Yes she has lost some blood, but not a lot Mr.Smith." Clara replied smoothly now focusing her attention to aid my arm as well.
She grabbed another white cloth now dabbing its fabric into my flesh to soak and clean all the remaining liquids.
Oh no.....
Pain still was circling my body like vultures, it was a never ending story and sadly this is only the beginning of the procedure....
My body was flooded with crucial pain penetrating me body like a needle, causing me to slip a weak moan, but since my body was battling so much torment it also caused my temperature to increased along with cold sweat, grazing my spine and bubble on my forehead. Worst of all my heartbeat started to climb like a mountain making my breathing level quicken....
Clara and her assistant both at the same time pulled out the once known white cloth to be completely soaked in red blood, mixed with my actual blood and inflammation......
Once Clara had my arm cleanse she now shifted her hands laying the bloody cloth on her metal tray and grabbed a magnifying glass, to improve her vision as she begins to examine my structure closely and thoroughly....
Erwin's entire intentions were concentrated and focused on me, worried about my safety which pricked his emotions to become more bothered knowing he couldn't do much.....
Erwin was growing anxious and troubled at the fact he couldn't do much except comforting me by holding my hand, but it gave me the chance to observe his behavior as my mind dozed off thinking about how sweet and caring he's been this last hour.
I've never seen Erwin become so distressed and worried in all my life. Always he was the picture of complete calmness nothing impacted his emotions furthermore his actions......until Erwin and I decided to be as one.
Erwin has always been so protective and concerned about my safety but never has he worried this extreme about my life.....
It's rather sweet to see Erwin in a state that he resembles worry because it's telling me how much he loves me, and I'll soon to be his wife....just imagine how beautiful he will act when his child is in danger.
A little girl of his own scrapes her knee on the concrete floor and comes crying to daddy with a full set of tears wanting him to put a bandaid on it....or perhaps his little boy is afraid of the dark and wants daddy to be the one to tuck him in and scare all the scary monsters away....
Gazing at his soft stricken face, filled with worry and caring all I could do was release such a gentle look along with a delicate smile.
You're going to be such a wonderful father, Erwin....
Clara remained quiet like the wind but for once Erwin was a bundle of nerves as though spiders were crawling up his skin.
"Dr.Nightengale is the bone just a simple split, or has it shattered into multiple pieces?" questioned Erwin with a smooth and clear voice, but his lower lip trembled in fear.
Clara had removed herself from my arm, and set aside the magnifying glass, starting to tinker and twiddle with her other tools laid on her metal plate.
"The good news Mr.Smith, your fiancé has no cracked or major injury to her body." She clearly stated like a clear open blue sky. "But it seems as though your fiancé has broken both her radius and ulna, causing each of the bone to snap in half."
Oh thank goodness it's that simple of a break......I don't think I would be able to withstand hours of open surgery with Dr.Nightengale trying to piece and secure all those cracked areas....
Erwin's face seemed to have relaxed a bit from the sudden news, understanding a break is better than shattered, but still, I wasn't fully secured in his arms.
"I understand, Doctor." reply Erwin still with a cautious look. "But what tools are you going to use towards the injury in order to sustain proper balance so the bone may grow back in place?" questioned Erwin just as smartly as Clara...."Perhaps rods and screws...." Erwin suspected with an interesting look mildly intrigued by the medical operation.
Increbile how intellgent Erwin is.....
He grasps the concept of the problem and already understands a solution.
Clara had swiftly begun to examine my forearm and then with her free hand, she grabbed a thick bulky screw and with her magnifying glass, she was examing and comparing the size of the screw if it was an appropriate measurement for the injury.
"That is correct, Mr.Smith." Clara replied promptly exchanging for a much bigger screw since my bone structure itself was on the thicker side....
During this time her assistant was as well measuring and analyzing the proper size of the rod to be inserted in my body.
"What's going to happen, Miss. Sinclair in order to properly connect your broken bones back together is by using this metal rod my assistant has."
Her male assistant had raised a very thin piece of metal that had four circular holes carved throughout the object.
"This rod will sustain the security for your bones to regrow, and one rod will be placed in your ulna and the other in your radius." Clara rationally explained, as she then lifted a normal size screw but this was specifically designed to fit the hole of the rod. "The screws will be inserted into the four holes to provide the stability for the rods."
Okay....Aurora you can do this. If I ever want to be able to use my arm again I just have to bite through the pain....
I blink my eyes a few times indicating I understand what the doctor was explaining, but given under my circumstances all I was feeling was nausea and ache everywhere.
Without any further delays Clara sat aside the magnifying glass and the rod onto the metal board and using both of her hands she bravely began to relocate the two snapped pieces of my ulna shifting them into the middle where they were originally sat.
The movement of her fingers and the strong force placed on my forearm felt like death itself. The pain was so crucial and irritating to my veins all I was feeling was tingling and straining as though my entire nervous system like I was stunned with a laser.
"AAAHHH...." I moaned impacted by the irritation in my veins forcing my temperature to rise along with causing my breathing rate to be as fast as a hummingbird.
Clara had each of the snapped ulna rearranged back to meet in the middle, and instantly the male assistant and her switched places allowing him to keep my bones steady as she jumped towards the most difficult part of the operation....the fixing, but she needed another set of hands to start this operation.
As one of her male assistants held my ulna together like a puzzle, another male assistant had rushed to her side waiting for her command on the next step since his hands were needed the most.
Clara as calm and collective as she already knew where the placement of the rod needed to be positioned, and that was in the interior area where the ulna and radius had a gap in between so that once the rods and screws were built in they would forever remain inside my body till the day I die...
The alignment of the ulna was secure along with the placement of the rod, now Clara called in on that extra assistant asking him to aid her by holding the rod steady right above where the ulna had snapped into two....
Feeling such tender hands maneuver and work on my open flesh still gave me unpleasant and painful sensations, but it was such a breather before what was coming next....
In Clara's right hand she grasped onto some sort of tool resembling a screwdriver in medical use, as her left hand grasped around a thick screw. She then lowered and positioned the tip of the screw towards the closest hole in the rod and then inserted the metal tip of the screw into the hole. Once the screw's tip was evenly inserted and gravity grasped its weight she dipped the tip of the screwdriver into the screw and started to rotate and twist the screwdriver clockwise, forcing the metal's tip to start grinding it's blade into my bare bone....
Already I was sweating bullets from the sudden jerk of my bones, now my bone itself had a metal object being drilled into bone merciless and strongly only shooting more pain to surge in my veins.
I shut my eyes tightly impacted by the brutal pain drilling in me nearly on the verge of screaming and it was getting there because the screw was more than halfway down my bone.....this was the most intense and barbaric pain I've ever felt.
"AHHHHHH...." I screamed feeling as though I had been murdered, biting down so strongly on the wood it created dents from my bite mark, as well as more saliva, kept drooling from the corner of my mouth.
Erwin's entire face squirms with discomfort watching me scream in so much pain, provoking his desire to do something other than comforting me kept rising the louder I cried.
"There isn't any possible medication to give to her to block the pain?" asked Erwin with a slightly troubled look feeling more in pain just to watch me suffer, but his hand still was locked with mine and sweat too was drizzling down both of our wrists.
Clara was just now finishing the third bolt, finally transitioning to the last screw as the screwdriver's tips kept rotating clockwise causing the screw's tip just to grind itself harder into my dense bone......
Feeling the sharp tip grind into my solid bone more and more piercing screams kept releasing themselves from my mouth, having the wooden spoon being drenching in saliva now.
Almost there.....I have to keep trying...
I can't give up.
Under the pressure of a patient screaming and crying from the intense pain, and an anxious fiancé Clara remained calm and collective like an eagle.
"If there was medicine to block her pain signals being sent to the brain, I would have given it beforehand." Clara rationally stated removing both of her hands out from my wound to take a breather and regain some strength since bones themselves were one of the hardest items in the human body.......excluding a certain flesh on a male.
Knowing Clara and her assistants had their hands removed from my wound, I too was getting a mild breather despite the oxygen breezing into my flesh causing my hairs to spike up, like feeling spiders crawling up your leg.
Oh.....thank goodness it's halfway done....
Erwin remained still rather intense and bothered since all he could do was hold my hand while I suffer this crucial pain and all he wanted to do to was help......if Erwin could, he would have been the doctor operating on me....
Clara's dark blue eyes met mine my green ones, as I read through her she still was incredibly calm throughout this whole operation.
"Miss. Sinclair, are you holding up alright?" she questioned rather kindly and comfortably like collapsing into your soft warm bed after a long hard day.
I'm in so much pain.....but I want this to be over.
With the little amount of energy left in me, I turn my head towards Erwin gazing upon his terrifying look, hoping he would get the idea I would like to speak.
Erwin instantly recognized what I wanted and removed the spoon from my mouth, even though it was as though a dog had been playing fetch with it.
The moment my mouth was clear I could breathe normally and somewhat feel a little ease knowing I didn't have something crammed in my mouth.
"Dr.Nightengale."I breathed still feeling a bit light-headed as though my head was filled with air. "Please continue, I just want this to be over."
Clara nodded her head completely understanding, as her assistances did as well. "You're very strong for a woman, Miss.Sinclair." Clara released a tiny smile delighted by my response. "I wish all my patients were determined like you." she kindly complimented with an assuring look.
That's so sweet of her....
Though I was inflicted with pain like wasps, I felt a hint of peace ease through my veins from the doctor's complement of me being strong, as a thought occurred through my brain.
All these year's I've always admired how Erwin was so mentally strong and capable to perform so significantly, but never did I step back and reflect on my behavior throughout my life...
How many females, in general, would willingly fight in the survey corps and knowing every expedition would be my last? It not only takes a noble heart to fight but also it requires guts to go out there, mentally preparing yourself.
Not only does the survey corps comes to mind, but even through my relationships with my family or friends comes to play. A lot of my friends have come to me with their problems and worries, as I would listen with respect and support them in whatever ways they needed to get through
I'm even strong enough to forgive Marie who nearly broke me apart by hurting the love of my life.....and after that so many changes took place.
I always viewed strong people to be tall and have a lot of muscles, but after this moment I now realize that I'm more on terms of mentally strong. Yes it's no secret I get scared or nervous easily like a black cat but the main focus is that I don't fret and accept my task how it is.
I am capable to go through the thorns that life has thrown at me....
Filled with hope in my veins, I roll my head over towards Erwin seeing his long handsome face filled with worry, only to cause a stunning smile across my lips
More importantly, I can do anything when I have him along my side....
"Erwin, my love." I breathed, finding myself in a trance just from his image.
Erwin's entire face seemed to have eased along with his blue eyes twinkling like a star. "Yes, my love?" he asked with a soft look tightening his grip around my hand.
"Erwin my darling you are my everything, and I couldn't have gone through this or life without you.....I love you so much..." a single tear escapes both of my eyes now overwhelmed from expressing all my desired and my passionate love for him.
The two male assistants both awed in delight from my response, as Clara was more focused on the sizing of the rods and screws for my radius...
Erwin released a calm smile from my response, instantly raising his hopes along with his adding ease to his mind.
It's truly remarkable how we both care about one another. Erwin is so focused on my physical health as I care about his mental health....
I couldn't imagine a life without him.
Feeling nearly drained like a glass of milk, I force the energy in me to gentle raise our hands as I slowly levitate it towards my mouth to bestow a gentle kiss on his palm.....
Erwin's entire face brightens like a lamp causing him to expose his teeth feeling my tender lips express my love for him.
I just can't wait till we are married...already you bring me so much joy and happiness and knowing you want to start a family with me is beyond my wildest dreams.
Once my mouth had released my gratitude and love I slowly drop our grip back to my thigh and then it leaves Erwin to insert the wooden spoon back into my mouth....
Before the wood touched my tongue I manage to slip one last sentence.
"When this is all over my love, you and I will finally become husband and wife." I smile feeling as peaceful and relaxed as a cloud in the sky nearly forgetting I was in the middle of surgery."I'll finally be yours."
Erwin's entire face softens like butter hearing my voice dance through his ears....
"You'll be mine till time decides to take you away, my love." Erwin responded happily now inserting the wood back into my mouth....
Having such a beautiful conversation with Erwin, the second part of the surgery wasn't as intense as the first. The pain was equivalent and strong as the first one but because of Erwin, he nearly made all my problems disappear....
Clara and her two male assistants worked on me like building a machine, six pairs of hands all operating on one single forearm, but I hardly even noticed because Erwin managed to take my mind away by starting up one of the most exciting parts of the wedding.....my gown and his tux.
Erwin already knew my family came from an upper-class environment, and naturally, he already predicted what was phase two. Visiting one of the most prestigious tailors in all over the districts, which luckily he lives right above Hermina's district which was the royal capital....
Magnus was his name and his clothes were his game.
Ever since I was born Mama had taken me to his shop and his talents and fabrics would dress me up like a doll. Even at such a young age, Magnus was charmed by how Bianca and I looked how and offer us to model for the children's clothes.
Bianca loved the idea of being adored and dressed to her disposal, but since we lived outside of Karanes district in the forest how could we come to report here for measurements? Papa is a hunter, and his job is in the forest and given Papa brings the bread in the house we had to live in the conditions of the forest.
Oddly it sounds sometimes I forget we even lived in the forest because I was so young and my memory started to play in when I was around seven or eight and by then Papa thought it would be best to stay with Grandma Smith. The childhood I remember most was mainly living in the city of Karanes with a golden hair boy and his used to be sour grandmother.
I do remember some things from the forest just not all, I mostly remember playing dolls or dress up with Bianca along with Papa showing me all his maps and telling me how big the world is.....sadly those memories are starting to slip my mind more and more.....
Erwin had managed to bring me so much happiness and energy because the thought of getting our outfits suited and measured was something I've always adored and more so I've been dreaming about getting married ever since I was a little girl.....marrying the love of my life.
The surgery was flying like an eagle, thinking how handsome Erwin would be standing in a black tux, along with me wearing a gorgeous innocent white dress caused my mind to drift in a state of bliss because it was going to be perfect......despite having a broken arm.
Given Erwin and I couldn't decide a certain date to go down and visit the Royal Captial, but given I was anxious to get married I wouldn't hesitate to go right after this surgery.
After nearly an hour and a half of open arm surgery, Clara had successfully finished her operation, leaving her to sigh in relief because the whole operation went smoothly and there were no complications.
The last step to finish this operation was mending. Clara had a much thicker needle with a string tied around it as she pierced it into my skin sliding it all the way through causing the string to be entered sewing right through my tender body. Once the string was secured in my flesh she then would pull out the needle advancing further up to then repeat the same movements until my skin was sealed back together almost like nothing ever happened except having a thick large scar running down my wrist all the way to my elbow. ....
"Congratulations, Miss.Sinclair." Clara spoke snipping the remaining strings off from my elbow finalizing the whole operation.. "Your forearm has successfully been fixed," she stated placing all her dirty equipment on the metal tray leaving the assistants to go and wash and cleanse the tools.
Finally, it's over.......
I can sleep....
The moment she breathed her words I felt a sudden weight being lifted from my shoulders feeling total relief and ease, but it's no secret Erwin was more relieved than me.
Erwin hastily dug to remove the spoon from my mouth so I could express myself freely, and I knew exactly how.
"Oh Erwin! It's over my love."
Erwin smiled peacefully from my response and then lifted himself from the cot next to me standing on his feet as he lowered his upper body to my forehead striking a loving kiss across my forehead.
"Yes, Aurora." he responded with a voice so smoothly and gracefully it reminded me of water. "But please my darling, rest...I want your body to recover. Your mind has experienced such a life threatening situation it was traumatizing, but your body also has been constantly fighting with pain, and the best way to recover and gain your stamina is through sleep."
He's so sweet.....
Hearing Erwin's delectable and calming voice dance through my ears, gave me so much satisfaction I released such a soft and pleasant look, I was melting from his humble actions.
"Of course, my love."
Though Erwin manage to calm me through this surgery, I wouldn't be here with two arms if it not were for Dr.Nightengale.
I then transition my attention towards the doctor feeling absolute happiness knowing without her we might have had to decide to cut my arm off.
"Thank you for everything Dr.Nightengale. You have done so much for me, how will I ever repay you?"
Clara smiled at my response finding it awfully sweet since most of her patients were rude and ungrateful not considering all the hard work she's performed.
"Nothing, my dear." she replied pleasantly with a calming look. "You made this operation much more helpful with your corporation and allowing me to perform without any complaints." her stunning dark blue eyes twinkled like stars.
My heart softens from her response because I intended to be as easy as possible and try my hardest not to whine.....but of course, I did but at least I wasn't complaining and giving her a hard time.
I was overjoyed filled with so much energy and happiness since I was in the process of healing which meant being able to use my arm again, but my body begged to differ.
Not a moment later I felt darkness and numbness start to overcome my senses causing my breathing and brain activity to lessen, dragging me into a deep, exhausted and worn out from all the suffering and pain I've dealt with.
"Thank you again, Clara....." I whispered before collapsing into a slumber that would not awaken until tonight.....
I was already knocked out like blowing out a candle, which meant Erwin and Clara could talk in private and exchange a few more sentences about today....
"Doctor," questioned Erwin with a focused look, gently dropping my hand so he could place a blanket on top of my exhausted body. "How long are you estimating Aurora's arm will heal?"
Once Erwin had gently covered me up like a sleeping princess, he also attended to my pillow and my head, carefully and gently rearranging my body and position.
Clara had taken a sip of water, dehydrated from the whole process and she nearly finished the whole glass
"I'm assuming more likely four to six months, Mr.Smith," she answered with an assuring look, desperate for another glass.
Once Erwin had taken care of my restless body still he worried himself greatly since I wasn't completely healed in his terminology......and since Dr.Nightenglae said I'll be months in a sling, I was basically handicap in Erwin's eyes....
"Where's her sling, that she will be needing?" he questioned still with a more stern look, glimpsing around the room hoping to spot the sing first.
Astonishingly this whole time Clara remained utterly calm with the blonde soldier......but how much longer could she handle it.
"It is right here Mr.Smith..." breathed Clara still wearing a more neutral look, as she bent down rummaging through her medical bag to pull out a beige arm sling from her bag.
The moment Clara revealed the fabric sling designed for carrying a broken arm, Erwin lunged forward grabbing the fabric as he begin to focus his attention on my right arm.
Clara watched Erwin with a more interesting look since his actions of his were unexpected and more so surprisingly, coming from a man.
Erwin as precise and careful as he can be had gently lifted my forearm arm with one hand acting as though he was holding a piece of glass and with his other, he started to slide in the sling underneath my arm giving him access to start equipping my broken arm in the fabric.
Once I had my entire forearm secured in the sling along with the strings around my neck, Erwin removed himself as his eyes refused to look anywhere else but gazing upon his bride to be sleeping so soundlessly and helplessly,
Clara now raised a brow with fascination along with parting her lips open from shock, since she noticed something particular and thought it would be helpful to give the blonde soldier some advice.
"Erwin.." Clara began grasping Erwin's attention but he just looked over his shoulder to see the brown hair doctor. "May I offer you some advice?" she pleasantly spoke with a silky voice.
Erwin still was rather stiff and tense given that the last hour or so he has been hearing his bride scream in agony, but he's never the one to turn a blind ear to hear someone.
"Yes...." he responded sternly, his head looking over his shoulder but his body facing his bride.
Clara remained utterly calm as her tongue began to echo through the room.
"If I'm being honest with you Erwin, the infirmary room is the juice to all the gossip and talks in the Survey Corps," Clara stated with a bold look presenting no fear. "And one of them is you and Aurora...."
Erwin remained in the same position his head glimpsing over towards the doctor not intrigued nor affected by what was passing through her lips because despite venturing out into the woods into total suicide, gossip and talk were right behind the Survey Corps branch.
"One of which is the two of you might be having a baby..." she stated with a gentle look, her eyes softening like butter and her shoulders lower with awe.....
Erwin's blue eyes had lowered to the ground remaining quiet for a seconds contemplating greatly what will come out from his mouth.
"That is a negative doctor." he responded rather lowly almost like a faint moan, having his eyebrows sunken filled with sorrow and disappointment but most of all his eyes filled with mellowness just mentioning a child creates so much sensitivity....
Clara's soft stricken face and gentle expression quickly switched back to a more neutral expression, seeing as though these rumors were false.....and wishing it were true.
"I understand, and I apologize for being so adamant, but the reason why I asked is that I noticed a very distinct character trait in you that is indeed wonderful but yet can be harmful." she sincerely spoke with a soothing voice.
Now Clara had said something which reeled Erwin in like a fish on a hook. Erwin turned his attention to face Clara, both their blue eyes staring at one another intrigued by the sudden conversation.
"Your very protective over Aurora, Erwin, and that is wonderful, I noticed this during the surgery. You have exemplified this trait and you are very cautious of her." she began with a steady look. "I just want Aurora and especially you to know, that if the two of you decide to have children, giving birth is the most painful sensation a human can feel." she thoroughly explained with a rational look.
Erwin reflected Clara's calmness still wearing a neutral expression, taking into consideration the doctor's suggestion, but he wanted to be clear as a crystal why would she be empathizing on birthing?
"Yes doctor." replied Erwin. "I'm just a little perplexed as to why you are reiterating the facts?" Erwin remarked intrigued by this conversation.
Clara was capable to release a tiny smile from Erwin's actions, knowing how little experience he has with pain and watching your love in pain.
"I just wanted to make sure you understand that this isn't the first Aurora will be in so much pain and suffering and all you can do it watch."
Erwin still remained silent, but Clara wasn't quite finished yet.
"I saw the way you were looking at Aurora, Erwin." she stated with an assuring voice still portraying a soft smile. "It was a look full of agony and most of all you were devastated to watch her suffer, without you helping her."
Erwin displayed no sort of emotions, just his eyes glued to the doctor trying to piece and analyze this whole situation and more so he was reflecting on himself.
"I just wanted to tell you this Erwin, not to scare you or anything but give you my observations and experience because in my field of work I've dealt with a lot of lovers being operated one each other, and never have I seen a man express so much passion and admiration for someone else." she paused a moment noticing how Erwin was becoming more reeled in by her words.
"I just wanted to give you another look at your perspective, that's all" she finalized her sentence and turned the conversation into something more cheerful and uplifting.
"And I'm sure the two of you will have a baby in no time." she smiled pleasantly exposing her teeth. "Aurora is capable to fight through the pain, and it seems as though your willing to be by her side till her last breath...."