History Has Its Eyes On You ~ A Hamilton Fanfiction (Book 1, Act 1)

Verge Of Insanity

!!Warning!!

(Y/N POV)

"You're insane." Emily uttered. "There is no way you're... accepting this?"
"Emily's right, Sophie." Eliza agreed. "Not on the boundaries of insanity, but... Do you really believe you should do this?"
"I don't..." I threw my hands behind my head. "I don't know."
"I think it's absurd!" Alexander declared, leaning upon the counter in the dining room. "They want a woman to join the war!"

"It's not like I haven't done so before, has it?" I questioned in irritation.
"You were a man!" He pushed himself towards us. "A man under the identification of Charlie Miller!" He laughed in a scornful way, sitting beside Eliza and facing me. "Sophie Hamilton is different."
"That doesn't mean they can't have the same ambitions!"

"You promised me that you wouldn't do anything like this again!!" Alexander argued.
"No, I promised you that I wouldn't go saving your ass again!!"
"That's enough!!" Eliza proclaimed. "Both of you. You're acting like children!"
Alexander slouched down.

"...If-" Emily darted her head up, catching our attention. "...If I may... I think that... I think that Sophie should go. If that's what she chooses."
"Em--"
"They wouldn't invite her to join them in they knew it wasn't safe, would they?" she persuaded Alexander. "Besides. The letter states that she'll be under the protection of Congress."
He sighed. "I suppose so..."

"And love, you'll be there to guide her!" Eliza joined. "Who even knows whether she is put through the course of physical battle or not?"
I nodded. "Precisely. I'm no good on the battlefield... So there's a chance I'll be required for another duty."
"Right hand man." Alexander confirmed. "You led us to a victory in the Battle of Monmouth, so I can only hope that that is what they want."
"For me to lead?"
"...Yes."

"...Then I will write to General Washington.

I will accept."

~

I walked down the street in the opposite direction to which I used to walk. The summer wasn't as ruthless as last year, judging by the layers of clothing I had to wear every day. This time last year, I was likely training for war. It only felt like yesterday that I was there with John, avoiding Alexander on all means necessary.

Valentino was on her hands and knees, scrubbing the edge of the pavement using a sponge. "Valentino?" I questioned. She scuttled onto her feet and hid the sponge behind her back. "...What are you doing?"
"Nothing! Just... cleaning."
"The path?"
"...Yes."

"Okay, well... Do you know where your brother is?"
"In bed. Sick." she murmured. She was keeping something from me.
"Of course he is." Valentino was rather short for her age, therefore I found it simple to peek over her. Faint stains of red were spread along the pavement near to the wall guarding the Dame.

"W- What are you doing?" I repeated. I seized for the sponge, thieving it from her momentarily. It was blemished in the red and gave off a metallic stench. "Blood..." I breathed. Dropping the sponge, I fled to the entrance. Valentino chased after me.

"He told me not to tell you, and I--!"
"Just let me deal with this!" I scooted past the door, ignored the greetings from others, and flew up the stairs. I barged through the bedroom door, startling Charles. "You fool." I waited a moment before running to hug him. "Why didn't you tell me?!"
"Tell you what?"
"About the blood!"
"The... blood..."

I pulled his face backwards for me to inspect; dry blood surrounded his lips. "Charles, we don't keep secrets from one another!"
"It's no secret, is it?" he grunted. "I've been sick for years."
"But blood, when had there ever been an involvement of blood?!"
"Since today. It's nothing."

He was lying.

"Tell me the truth."
"Y/N."
"Tell me the truth."
Charles weaved a hand through his hair. "A week. It's been happening for a week."
"And you're not lying?"
"Y/N, I never lie to you! Only now, because it's nothing to... to brood about!"

"But it is! And you must inform Doctor Hosack!" I pleaded.
"I have." Charles admitted.
"And what does he have to say?"
"He says it's nothing. Just symptoms that will... that will perish in another week or so!"
"I'll need to talk with him, I'm just so--"

"You don't trust me?" Charles gripped my hand. His eyes were tinted with misery.
"I... I do trust you, Charles... I just can't trust myself. I can't trust myself to accept certain things, because I'm scared of the consequences and-"
"I love you, Y/N. More than I could ever love myself. Your hardships are mine. Your pain is mine." He rested his other hand on top of the one he was holding. "And I swear to you by God that I am well. I'm only in need of time to collect myself together, so that we can be together."

I grinned. He bared a soothing voice, able to carry you away into a sleep with ease. "And I love you." I confessed. "Alas, I... I needed to tell you about something."
"Anything, what is it?"
"...I'm going back into the war."

Charles frowned. "They'll instantly recognise you-"
"No." I stopped him. "I was invited. By General Washington."
He looked away in disbelief. "No, you're... a wom--"
"A woman. They insist that my war tactics were skilfull, and I should make a return under the protection of Congress to lead."

"This will... change everything. History will be reformed." He shook his head. "They surely wouldn't allow this."
"You don't trust me?" I mimicked him. He scoffed sarcastically. "But yes, I accepted, to your dismay."
"Dismay?" Charles criticised. "Y/N, the world will know your name! Our descendants will write essays about you!"

"You're not scared at all?"
"Are you?"
"Slightly... It's war." I joked. "If I fail to make an impression of myself, I'll be mocked."
"Only a dishonest man would mock a woman. Have no fear, Y/N. You're beautiful in the eyes of many... And from my perspective, far beyond."
"Stop flattering yourself!" I shoved him away from me, laughing as I did so.

"With all of this, you seem to be forgetting one small thing..." Charles reminded.
"Hah! I never forget!" I tried to act confident.
He spread his arms out. "The man that sits before you is a year older than you'd previously recorded."
"It's your birthday?!!"
"Indeed, Miss L/N."

"I- I'm so sorry, it completely slipped from my mind..." I sighed. "I didn't get a chance to buy you a present..."

"Seeing you here today is enough to satisfy me."