95. Landslide

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May 19th 2017, Los Angeles

"Alright... let's take a look at what we have here," James Corden spun the table around, "a fish eye, bird saliva, hot sauce, cod sperm, grasshoppers, salmon smoothie, bull penis, clam juice," he said and I already felt sick at the idea of having to eat some of them, "this is how Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts works: I'm going to ask you all question, you can either answer the question or not but, if you don't, you'll have to eat whatever I give to you and vice versa... we'll start with Jade,"

"I'm very nervous, James!" I admitted and everybody in the audience, including my team and Harry's team, laughed, "is this safe? I mean, can I eat them and avoid death?" 

"I think so...Don't be nervous, love... I'm giving you the fish eye," he burst out laughing before taking the piece of paper from the little table next to him and bursting out laughing again, "Jade... you've toured the world with One Direction back in 2015... so, who's your least favorite member?" he asked and I looked at him with the stinkiest eye I had ever given anyone, 

"I mean... I'm not saying I hate you... but I truly do at the moment," I said before taking one of the two eyes on the little bowl and looking at it, "it stinks!" I cried and the audience laughed at me. I took a bite of it and it tasted like nothing I had ever tasted, like it was rotten. I immediately spit it out and drank the whole glass of water, while everybody laughed at me.  

"I'm going to give you the salmon smoothie," I said as I recovered from what I had just eaten and spun the table around, "James... Tell us who's the worst performer you've ever had on the show?" I laughed as I looked at him struggling, "and you can't say me because I'm here," 

"This is evil!" he chuckled, 

"I just swallowed a part of fish eye, James," I said with the most disgusted face on, "I think you can do this... or you can say who was the worst performer," I shrugged and he ingested that disgusting thick "smoothie", making everybody gag. After that question, the other guests had their turns but, unluckily, I was the last question of the game. 

"Jade..." he burst out of laughing as he read the paper, "we all know you know Harry Styles, our musical guest who's backstage..." he kept on laughing, "and you say he's your best friend... so, what's one thing that no one knows about him?"

"Who made these questions?" I dramatically raised my voice, "uhm... let me think about this one because it could really get me in trouble," I said and everybody laughed, I turned around and saw Pat who was mouthing me to make something up or say whatever was going on in my mind, "uhm... so when he has a fever he gets a bit delirious," I tried to hold back my laughter, "and he makes weird noises but doesn't really realize he's doing it,"

"Weird noises?" James giggled, 

"He kind of whines... I don't know," I laughed, "it's very funny but... I always feel sorry because he's sick... so I try to be serious as he makes those noises," 

"Alright, that's it," James said as he kept on laughing, "we'll be back after the commercial with whiny Harry Styles performing Kiwi," everybody cheered and I smiled, "and a full interview with the lovely Jade Evans," I nodded. 

"This was hilarious!" James said as we were walking towards the little couch, 

"I think Harry might be hating me right now," I laughed, "but I wasn't going to eat a bull penis!" 

"Out of all the things you might have said..." Harry said as he walked towards us while chuckling, "what a supportive girlfriend I have,"  

"I panicked," I shrugged as I was laughing, "nothing came to mind but that," he shook his head, "look at you with this sexy jumpsuit!" I squealed as I realized he was actually wearing a stripey one. His butt looked just incredible with it and I just knew everyone was going to love his look and his Kiwi performance. Truth to be told, it was my favorite song to see him perform because he just lost himself in the meanwhile and it was nice to see him as carefree. 

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