Marble Hornets Randomness

S w O r D

Alex: Jay, check out this fuckin sword I bought

Jay: wow

Alex: I look cool as shit right now

Jay: I'd rather say that you look like shit lol

Alex: Yeah well, thanks for hurting my feelings. I guess I'll just become suicidal

Jay: lol

Alex: what happened to you

Jay: well, it all started when I was going for a walk one day and I saw a squirrel. I thought, "oh wow a squirrel" and I followed it just like any human being would do... And it led me to an alleyway in the middle of New Jersey. I don't remember much of what happened. But it was dark, scary, and I was surrounded by a group of shirtless guys who wanted to beat me up

Alex: what

Jay: that actually happened

Alex: How did a squirrel take you to New Jersey

Jay: Well... I kinda kept following different squirrels

Alex: how did you get to New Jersey in the first place

Jay: Those darn squirrels

Alex: what The fuck

Jay: yeah

Alex: are you going to acknowledge my sweet ass sword

Jay: that's one sweet ass sword

Alex: that's not what I meant. Like cherish it. I spent almost two hundred dollars on it

Jay: why would you spend two hundred dollars on a sword

Alex: The guy who I bought it from said that they'd kill my wife and my kid. I don't have a wife or a kid. I bought it for... future protection

Jay: I've gotta admit. That's pretty rad

Alex: yeah

Jay: pretty fuckin badass

Alex: mhmm

Jay: freakin amazing

Alex: yeahhh

Jay: that sword is gonna protect mankind, I just know it

Alex: Hell yeah

Jay: how sharp is it

Alex: sharp enough to give you a cut

Jay: d a m n

Alex: dude... It's a sword. It can cut small things in half

Jay: that's pretty cool. Can I try it out

Alex: hahahaha, why would I let you use any of my things? Lmao

Jay: please

Alex: there

Jay: -grabs sword- hahaha... This... Ow, my back. Oh my God... Ow ow

Alex: -grabs sword from Him- what

Jay: that's one big sword

Alex: yeah it is

-later that day-

Tim: why is there a sword laying on the table

Jay: Alex bought a sword and left it here so he could go grocery shopping

Tim: alright?

Jay: to be honest, the sword looks pretty fucking stupid

Count how many times I said sword
I dare you