NO ONE'S POV
As soon as Alix finished reading JYP's statement, she fell back to the floor in complete shock while the rest of the girls, oblivious to what had just happened, continued performing. Since it was Alix's turn and she didn't sing, though, they all quickly turned to her to see what was going on.
Alix could no longer hear the music coming through the speakers nor the sounds of the fans cheering or speaking to each other. All she could hear was the sound of her blood passing through her ears as her heartbeat quickened and she started sweating. She couldn't breathe properly and was starting to hyperventilate.
"You are going to die alone," a voice in her head said. "They are all leaving you. You will die all alone."
Her vision then started to get blurry as she covered her ears to try to stop hearing the voices but she wasn't in control of her mind and body anymore.
As soon as the girls saw she wasn't okay, they all quickly ran to her to aid her. They didn't know what was happening to her at first, but soon Mika recognised she was having a panic attack.
"Alix, Alix!" Mika tried calling her but to no avail. "Girls, tell the staff to get their asses here right now!"
Soon Leah and Lin rushed to get help while Mika and Soojin stayed with Alix. They didn't care if they were in the middle of a concert, their only priority was to help her.
"What happened?!" Mika asked the nearest fans in Japanese.
The fan who had handed Alix her phone minutes before then pointed towards her phone on the floor of the stage and Soojin quickly picked it up to see what got her like that.
As soon as she finished reading it, Soojin started crying and sobbing uncontrollably, which made Mika panic even more. She knew Soojin wouldn't be able to answer if she asked, so she just picked up the phone herself and read the news.
Was she affected by it? Of course, she was. But she was also the leader of the group and she knew that at least one of them had to stay strong. She had to act like a true leader and help the rest to the best of her abilities while trying to keep her emotions at bay.
The staff, Leah and Lin then rushed to their side and the staff quickly took Alix away since being surrounded by so many people wouldn't help her at all. They all wanted to go to check on her, but they were in the middle of a concert and they just couldn't let the fans waste the money they had spent on the tickets.
"What happened?" Lin asked Mika and Soojin when she saw Soojin crying. "This is getting a little scary."
"Girls, Woo-" Soojin tried to say but Mika stopped her.
"Not now, Soojin. We need to finish the concert," Mika told her and Soojin nodded understandingly.
"No, you are telling us right now what the heck is going on!" Leah exclaimed but tried to not let the fans hear it. "Alix just had a panic attack and Soojin is crying her eyes out when she barely ever cries unless she is deeply hurt emotionally. I know you are our leader and want to save this situation but we deserve to know."
"Woojin has left Stray Kids and JYP," Mika answered and blinked quickly to stop the tears.
Lin and Leah then covered their mouths in shock while Mika went to the owner of the phone and handed it back to her before going back with the girls.
"I don't know how we are going to do it but we need to finish this concert somehow. I know I sound like a bitch right now, but I really don't know what else to do," Mika said shredding a couple of tears. "I really don't understand..."
The girls then all did a group hug together and tried to calm down before heading to the main stage to apologise and continue with the concert, still worried about Alix and not being able to get Woojin off their minds.
ººº
ALIX'S POV
"That's right, Alix. Breathe in... and out..." one of the paramedics told me backstage as I tried to recover from my attack. "Don't rush it, just keep your breaths nice and slow."
I had a very bad headache and every single muscle in my body felt like it had been twisted, so I couldn't even remember what had happened for a whole five minutes. As I started coming back to my senses, though, I started hyperventilating again and Yeongjae quickly hugged me and breathed loudly so I started to match his breathing pattern.
"Alix, I read the news too but you need to calm down," he said as I cried onto his shoulder. "When the concert finishes I promise we will try to call JYP and the boys to ask them what happened but you need to calm down."
"The concert!" I said remembering we were in the middle of a concert. "I can't leave the girls hanging! I need to go back with them!"
"Yes, you can," he told me. "You just had a panic attack, Alix. Prioritise your health for once!"
"Precisely because I want to prioritise my mental health I want to go on stage," I told him and grabbed my microphone as I stood up. "I don't want to have another panic attack again and unless I keep myself busy, I won't stop thinking about it."
Even though Yeongjae was yelling at me to not go back, I quickly ran back to the stage and joined the girls in the middle of «Save me, Save You» (Leah: Dayoung + Soobin; Mika: Yeonjung + Bona; Lin: Eunseo + Luda; Alix: SeolA + Dawon; Soojin: EXY + Yeoreum). They were all shocked to see me back, but I tried to pretend nothing had happened because if not I would end up breaking down again and I couldn't let that happen. I needed to be strong for the group and shut down all of my emotions at once because I knew that, by doing so, I wouldn't be hurt. Maybe Alix had to stop being Alix for a while. That was the only way out.
ººº
Once the concert finally ended, we all gathered with Yeongjae to try to contact JYP and the boys. Even Mika's parents had joined us backstage but we were so out of it that we unconsciously pretty much ignored them. We just wanted to know what was going on because it all felt too surreal. It felt like a nightmare.
"Not even their manager is picking up the phone," Yeongjae said after trying to call him.
"Try with JYP again," Mika told him as she tried to call Chan
"If they don't answer, I'm coming back to Korea," Soojin said. "We still have a few days until the concert in Bangkok. I'm going to get answers, I don't care how."
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves. We should wait until they-" he tried to say but stopped since JYP had picked up the call. "Oh, yes! Hello, sir... The girls are here with me, yes... Of course."
He then put the phone on speaker so we could all hear him.
"Good night, girls. How was the concert?" he asked us.
"Please, quit the formalities and go straight to the point. We all know what this call is about," I said shocking everyone there since it was very unlike me to talk back.
"Yes, of course," he said. "Well, after discussing it with Woojin and the boys, he has left the group. It's due to personal reasons. I can't say anything other than that."
"So you basically answered our call to say what your announcement for the fans and the press said?" Soojin asked him this time. "I'm flying back to Korea to ask Woojin himself if that is all you are giving us."
"You need to finish the tour," he reminded us.
"To hell with the tour!" I exclaimed shocking everyone yet again. "I couldn't care less about the flipping tour right now. One of my best friends just left Stray Kids and the company and you are telling me to focus on the tour?"
"Alix, calm down," Leah told me grabbing my arm.
"No, I won't!" I said releasing from her grasp. "I want answers. Can't I have them?"
"Look, Alix, Woojin left due to personal reasons. I can't tell you because he is the only one who should decide who gets to know and who doesn't. I can't give you any answers because I am not the one who can make that decision," he said not minding my tone at all. "The rest of the boys are just as shocked and affected as you are. Believe me, it's all being very hard for them too, but just let it rest for tonight. Go to sleep, clear your mind and maybe try calling them tomorrow. I can't force them to answer your calls nor can I force you to stop calling them. Please, just don't rush things and don't seek immediate answers."
"Quit the philosophical talk!" I exclaimed once again. "One of my best friends is leaving me yet again!"
After I said that, Mika pulled me towards her and embraced me in a hug. I wasn't crying or anything like that because I refused to, but I couldn't help but be angry about the whole situation. Just days before Woojin had promised me to meet up when we came back but now he was the one leaving and without even saying goodbye.
"Alix, I think, although I hate to admit it, that JYP is right and we should try to talk tomorrow when things calm down a little. We are all too overwhelmed right now and aren't able to think clearly," she told me. "We need to give the boys some time too."
"You are all going to be getting on a plane in less than three hours, so use that time to relax, get some sleep and organise your thoughts and feelings. I promise that will help," JYP said. "I'm not your enemy, girls; I'm not doing this to get on your nerves. I really care about your well-being and your mental health but I also know how you all are and know that you will regret it if you cancel the tour now. Please, think about it. Reflect on it and tell Yeongjae to call me tomorrow, alright?"
"Good night, sir," Mika said before Yeongjae hung up.
"God, how I hate that he's right!" Leah said and kicked the couch next to her.
"I just can't believe Woojin didn't say anything..." Lin said. "He was alright before we left. This is all too unexpected."
"I'm honestly very worried about the boys," Soojin pointed out. "I really want to be there for them but we are flipping out of the country. I'm sure they are a mess right now."
"I think Alix may be a close representation," Mika said trying to lighten the mood.
She then approached her parents to explain everything that had just happened and I used that moment to go to the bathroom to wash my face and try to calm down. I had said I would stop my emotions yet had miserably failed, but I was willing to try yet again.
I then received a text and took out my phone sighing thinking it was one of the girls but I was shocked to see it was Jisung.
The fact that the first message I had received in days was him telling me he loved me and that he had taken time to write that to me amidst everything that was going on truly let me know that he wasn't okay at all and knowing he was hurt, hurt me even more than I would have ever thought, so I fell to the floor and started sobbing right there, in the middle of an empty bathroom of a concert venue.