Dear John, how are you, dearest? I hope all is well... I wanted to ask, how to live with a neat freak? Ok, I'll make it clear. My friend got married recently and her husband is a neat freak and she is not; her things seem to lie out in their usual place at times and he's way too neat and organised. She feels incredibly insulted when he chides her, albeit lovingly. Help?
Dear AshleyMaycury ,
I am doing well, although my cat somehow knocked my phone into the toliet, so I'll be going without a cell phone for a few days. *wonders how I survived before cell phones and is immediately disappointed in self*
Down to business, I am an absolute slob and have been told so more than once by Paul, who is the dictionary definition of a neat freak. When Paul and I were in Paris, we had troubles with our differences in order. The only reason we survived the trip without murdering each other was accepting each other. If Paul stopped pressuring me to fold EVERYTHING, I stopped complaining about him organizing my socks somewhere I couldn't find them.
Your friend shouldn't beat herself up about not being a neat freak. She should accept herself for who she is. Make sure to tell her to let her husband know that if he wants to be neat, fine. He just shouldn't force her into being neat.
She could negotiate an area for her to keep her things "her way" where he won't judge or feel the need to tidy up. In return, a space will be designated for him to clean like a maniac. I did this to Paul and he spent hours cleaning out my closet once. It really got him out of my hair.
The longer your friend is married, the less irritating it will be. They will be used to one another's quirks and cleaning routines.
I hope things work out for her!