"Dad, I'mma tell you one last time, go away!" Jahseh threw another pillow.
"And I'mma say it again, move the wings." Jesus crossed his arms.
I was just sitting there. I was scared to move, I could windmill any nigga that I wanted to, but the Lord? I'm good luv.
Jahseh groaned and facepalmed. "I'm not moving anything. If you would just go and take a seat downstairs-"
"I think I'll stay right here." He said, leaning on the door frame.
Jahseh sighed and rested his head on my shoulder. "We need to get him to leave." He mumbled.
"I heard that."
"Shut the fuck up and go wait for us downstairs!" Jahseh screamed.
"You lucky Harmony been telling my ass to listen to you. Or I would have been took off my belt." Jesus muttered before closing the door. I could hear him stomp down the stairs angrily.
Jahseh huffed and slowly removed his wings. He stared at me, his eyes returned to their natural beautiful brown.
"Sorry about that." He smiled.
"I don't see shit funny." I responded.
He nodded and put his head down. It got quiet for a second.
I couldn't help it. I started to laugh so hard that my chest hurt, Jahseh joined in after a few moments.
He started to wheeze. "Did you see his face when he busted in here?"
"He came in here thinking that you were dying, I bet he ain't expect to see you on me like that." I choked.
Tears streamed down my face as I gave in to my giggles again. The image of Jahseh falling off the bed and then the literal Lord catching us post sex was hilarious.
"If I wasn't going to hell before, then I sure am going now. That was too much."
Jahseh stopped laughing to pat my back. "Nah, you're definitely getting into heaven. If Daniel's name is on the list, then yours ain't far behind."
I stopped laughing. "Daniel is on the list to get into heaven?"
Jahseh nodded. "Yep. Ion know how but it's on there." He shrugged.
"Plus, I'd never let my dad sleep if he refused your soul. I would have to literally unleash hell in heaven." He pecked my lips.
"You ain't got to do all that for me."
"Tuh. Boy please. Did you not hear what I said earlier?" He tilted his head.
"You mean when you were speaking in tongues?" I teased. He smacked my arm.
"That was Greek you dumbass. And yeah, you didn't understand?"
I shook my head. "Strictly English here."
"I said that I didn't care about heaven or being an angel. I'm staying here with you. And I mean it, I'd give it up for you if you asked me to Stokeley because I love you." He playfully punched my shoulder.
"I love you too, Jahseh."
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Jahseh's POV
"Now what the hell were y'all doing in there? I'm drinking my juice, talking with Whitney Houston, and I hear Jahseh screaming like his life depended on it." My dad questioned, his arms were crossed as he sat on the couch across from me and Stokes.
I lifted my head from where it was laying on Stokeley's shoulder. "What do you think? I know you old but you ain't that stupid."
"I'm hoping that I didn't just catch my son, an angel, doing the one thing that I banned all angels from doing." He chuckled.
"Well nevermind, you dumb ass fuck if you hoping that." I answered. Stokeley started to cough.
"I don't think that was the best thing to say, Jahseh."
I smiled up at him and kissed his cheek. "Don't be scared of his loose booty ass. He ain't gon do shit anyways."
"Are you sure? He looks pretty angry to me." Stokes scrunched up his nose.
I waved him off. "Not a damn thing. He's just as soft as you are. You could probably windmill that nigga and he'd cry."
We both snickered.
"I'm still here, and I can hear y'all." My dad stomped his foot.
"Oh yeah. You can leave now. I'm fine. You don't have to worry."
"That's not- look, didn't I tell that you weren't allowed to engage in sexual activities? I remember having a long talk with you about that." He rubbed his temples.
"I remember not listening while you were giving me that talk. It's too late anyways, I've already had my-"
"Don't. You. Dare. Finish. That. Sentence. Jahseh." Both my dad and Stokeley said at the same time.
"Okay Daddy." I responded with a smirk.
"Thank you for listening." My dad sighed.
"I wasn't talking to you." I quipped.
"Wait, then who-"
"Nevermind. Dad, go home." I hopped out of Stokeley's lap and grabbed my dad's arm to lift him off of the couch.
He grabbed the sleeve of Stokeley's hoodie that was hanging loosely from my arm. "Jah. You broke one of my rules."
"I don't care. I'll come and visit you on your birthday next week, then we can talk. Okay, now go home and tell Geneva that I hate her bitch ass." I shoved him towards the door.
"But-"
I popped his forehead. "Leave!"
He popped mine back. "Don't hit me."
I popped him again. "No you."
We kept going back and forth. The door behind us flew open.
"We're back- what is going on?" Regina asked, placing her yoga bag on the floor.
"Move! I gotta shit! I been holding in this turd all damn day." Rodney pushed past all three of us and scurried up the stairs to the bathroom. I heard the door slam shut.
"That boy Rodney...where did I go wrong with that one?" My dad mumbled.
"Ion know. I really don't." I sighed.
"Uh, yeah I agree, but who the hell are you?" Regina piped up.
"Ma, that's Jahseh's dad." Stokeley said from the couch. He had his head in his hands.
"Oh, so you the deadbeat ass nigga that the poor boy be talking about?" My momma squared up.
"Ma. Please." Stokeley pleaded.
"Nah fuck that, its one thing that I can't stand and that's a no good ass, deadbeat ass, limp dick ass nigga. You gotta leave." She said, putting her hands down.
"I see you're doing well Regina. Your health has increased, that's good for the child." My father started to to stare at her growing belly.
He earned a slap for that. "You don't know shit about my health. Now leave before I call Cleo and we take turns stomping yo ass out on my lawn."
He held up both hands in defeat. "I'm leaving, don't worry. I was just checking on my son."
"And I said I was fine. Now go, I'll talk to you soon." I pushed him towards the door.
He gave Stokeley a dirty glare before he left.
I heard Stokeley let out a nervous chuckle. "Well, that was fun."
"Yeah." I nodded in agreement. I walked back over to the couch and plopped down next to him.
Regina let out a whistle. "Oh, y'all nasty."
Stokeley and I sat up. "What?"
She cackled. "Really? You thought that I wouldn't notice? Jah, it looked like you were attacked by a leech. And I saw you limping a little bit."
I ain't even deny it. I just threw my hands up. "Yep. You got us."
"Oooh my boy is a man now!" She rushed over and squeezed Stokeley's cheeks.
"Ma, please stop." He tried to pry her hands off of his face.
"Nigga, you better not touch my hands. Now, tell me,how was it? Did y'all use protection? Dick you suck his dick? I heard that doggy style-"
"Ma!" Stokeley cut her off.
"Whew, Miss Regina it was great. Let me tell you, I didn't think that he would be packing like that, I nearly died." I breathed out dramatically.
"I think I'm gonna faint." Stokeley added.
Regina squealed. "He gets that barbarian dick from his daddy. It's the reason I keep trying to make our marriage work, I can't stand the nigga."
"And I can't stand yo ass either." Rodney added from the top of the stairs.
"Shut yo shitty ass up! I outta beat yo ass for farting in that lady office, had it smelling like hemorrhoids!" Regina snapped back.
I felt a hand grab my hoodie collar and yank me off of the couch.
"We're going back upstairs." Stokes mumbled. Regina and Rodney kept arguing as we both left.
"Stanky booty bitch, that's why you wear diapers now!"
"Nigga fuck you I don't need diapers. Yo booty hair done probably burned off with them atomic ass farts."
"Yo nose hair probably burned off with that hot ass, stank ass breath that you be blowing out."
"Fuck you, Rodney!"
"Fuck you too, hoe!"
-JADA