I'm not sure that I want to know what Brie and Steve have planned for their Christmas night, all I know is that she took duct tape, a pencil sharpener and the last of the whipped cream with her when she left.
Josh, don't think about it too hard. The mental images will be enough to keep you soft for fucking days.
Although with the way that Cole is staring at me right now as I get to the stop of the staircase, I realise that may not be a terrible thing.
I look at Miles' bedroom door but some part of me doesn't want to walk in there with Cole looking at me, so I step across the hall instead into heathers room to check on Liam.
He does realise that Miles stays with me every fucking night right? What exactly does he think we get up to...
These two are so fucking cute. Heather hanging off the edge of the bed fast asleep with her arm brushing against the carpet, Liam sensing her in his own sleep as he stretches out until their fingertips are almost touching.
They have such a bond, something that travels deep within them both. I'm not sure what it will grow or won't grow into one day, but I know they'll never lose that. That connection from one person's soul into another isn't something that can be ignored.
When I step back out into the hall, Cole is still fucking standing there against his door frame like he was waiting for me.
Why is he making this so fucking awkward...
"You know, we never let him have Zoe sleepover."
That you know of mate, from listening to stories about the two of them she spent a lot more nights here than you fucking realise.
Besides, the reason you didn't let Zoe stay here... Yeah, unless this story is about to take a real fucking turn, that's definitely not going to happen to me.
"Goodnight Josh... I'll be right in here if you need anything... Right here. Right at the bottom of the hallway where my son sleeps in the room right outside."
I don't remember Cole scaring me this much a few years ago. I thought guys were supposed to mellow with age...
Placing my hand on the handle, I let the door open slowly. God, please don't let there be action figures and week old plates... Don't let there be posters of half naked women on the ceiling... please.
Stepping inside I'm actually pleasantly surprised, other than his poor attempt to shove all of the clothes that I'm betting were covering his floor ten minutes ago into the overflowing hamper, it's actually really nice in here.
It smells like him... I fucking love that scent, I could take a fucking bath in it.
The shower is still going in the en-suite across the room, so I just walk in. Besides, I'll probably never get a better opportunity to snoop around.
Most of the presents that everybody got him are still piled up on his modern black bed, he doesn't have a lot of stuff that shows he actually lives here around the place, but when I get to his bookshelf it's a very different story.
My heart clenches in my chest looking over each one.
He's got photos, so many photos. They aren't in frames or anything, most of them look like they were printed recently and just shoved up against the books but they're still so fucking sweet.
On the bottom shelves are ones of him when he was younger, a few with him and May, and one really cute one of him, Al and Jayce at the Science Museum. The further you look up the shelves, it's like watching him grow before your eyes.
There's a couple with Eli, some of them smiling and some of them where they've clearly had a bit too much to drink. I chuckle at the one of him and Zoe stuffing their faces with cake, getting more down their shirts than they're actually getting in them.
There's one from Jayce's wedding, it's the one that Al made my mum take off all of us sitting around that big table in the evening. You can sense the fucking sexual tension between Steve and Brie just looking at this image, but it's the way Miles is looking up at me that makes my breath get caught in my throat.
It really was always there for him wasn't it? How the fuck couldn't I see that... He's looking at me like I'm the most important person in the fucking world, I can't believe I fucking broke him that night.
I know that I didn't know, it wouldn't have made a difference even if I did. He was still a kid, I would have assumed it was just a crush and probably made sure to keep myself even further away from him than I already did.
In some ways I'm so glad that I never knew, I might not have been able to see him with the fresh eyes I did that day at my office if I'd had that thought in the back of my head. Instead, now it's something I can just smile about, knowing that I was always special to him, it's just in a different way now.
Standing and looking at the shelves that are at his eye height now, I recognise every photo, because I'm in them. He's got everything from the one we took together on our first date, to the one Liam made us take outside the diner, and so many others. He's left space, gaps in the shelf ready for us to fill with new memories.
We are going to have a lifetime of them. I think he's going to need a bigger shelf.
"You finished admiring your own face yet?" I jump out of my skin, Miles chuckling as he stands with his arms crossed over his chest leaning against the door frame of the bathroom. The steam leaking out behind him only emphasising the water that still covers his body.
"You really think I was staring at me?" I laugh, picking up the photo of the gang from the wedding, fuck we all look so young... Doesn't feel like only a few years ago. "You know, I think this is the first photo of us together, technically."
Miles chuckles, shaking his head and turning to open the drawer of his desk. He shuffles through the total disorganisation before picking up an image and smiling widely at it before glancing up at me.
"Actually," he hands over the photograph, the tape still on the corners from where he pulled it out of one of Tara's photo albums. "This is the first photograph of us together, technically."
I almost want to fucking cry looking at this. It's a photo of me, Jayce and Chad, standing at the bottom of the staircase here after our first basketball practise together. You can just about make out Miles behind us, but he's very much in the shadow of our three smiles.
This feels like yesterday, yet a million years ago at the same time. I didn't really know either of them that well before then, I didn't go to the same schools that they did until high school. They always seemed like a duo that you didn't get between, but Chad asked me if I wanted to come over to Jayce's house for pizza and I practically ripped his arm off to be included in their little group.
Now that I really think about it, I think I remember Miles that day. I'm sure I hadn't met him before, I don't remember what we said to each other but I just kept looking at him with nothing but a smile on my face. He clearly fucking adored his brother, and even when his mum told him to leave him alone, Miles just took a step back but stayed where he could try to be part of the group as well.
He's so far from that boy now, he doesn't need the validation of anybody else around him. He's fucking incredible, he is so much more than the copy of Jayce that he was so desperate to be back then.
He's Milo fucking Thompson.
"It's nice to be reminded that you were young once." He quips, but it just makes me shove my hand into his shoulder until he starts to stumble away still giggling.
He really needs to stop saying stuff like that, I'm going to get a fucking complex. I'm not even that fucking old!
Miles takes hold of my wrist, pulling my attention away from the photograph and back to him as he steps into my arms.
I just look at him, really fucking look at him.
Back then I thought he was just a sweet kid, now I think he's the most beautiful man I've ever met. If I think back on every moment, it's actually frightening to realise how many times we've felt connected over the span of our lives.
Like the bond was there just waiting to snap into place at the right time.
Call it destiny, or fate. Either way... It just means we were meant to be.
"Do you want your present now?" He asks, his still damp hands circling around my neck and weaving his fingers into my hair.
Yes I want my present... Unless he's just planning on whipping that towel off to reveal a strategically placed bow...
Usually it's something that I'd really fucking want but considering the look that Cole gave me earlier, I'd rather he didn't lure me into such fucking temptation.
His lips gently stroke against mine, his hold on me is firm but his lips pressing against my own are so soft. I love fucking kissing him, I know I've said it so many times but I just can't stop.
We haven't had the time that everybody else has together, but we get to have the rest of our fucking lives together so who gives a fuck.
Miles pulls away from the kiss, angling us around so that he can back me up to sit on the end of the bed, before reaching into that same draw in his desk and pulling out a small box.
That's my present?
He seems to stare at it, then look back at me, like he's hesitant to even pass it over. He's only ever given me amazing fucking presents, I don't know why he's so worried about this one.
Slowly, he steps between my legs, taking my palm and turning it up to face him before he places the box on the surface.
"Don't freak out, when you've opened it give me the chance to explain." Well that doesn't sound ominous at all...
I gently pull away the tissue paper, revealing a small black box with the silver etching of a constellation right on the top. I look at it trying to figure out which constellation pattern it's from but I'm not as good at this as he is.
His whole body stiffens as I start to gradually lift the lid, but I swear all the oxygen gets sucked out of the room when I look inside...
A ring.
He got me a ring.
Fuck.
My heart starts to beat so wildly in my chest I half expecting to break free, not slowing remotely as I look down on the solid silver band covered in the pattern of star constellations staring back at me.
"Josh, don't panic... It's not an engagement ring."
Oh thank fuck.
I love him, I fucking love him but he's fucking nineteen. I don't want him feeling like he has to make a step like that yet, that kind of tie isn't what I need to prove what our relationship is...
Besides, I kind of want to ask him.
He quickly stretches back over to the desk, never letting his body leave from between my legs and pulling out a virtually identical box from the draw, crouching down so we are face to face before he opens it to show a ring that is the mirror of the one I hold in my hands.
"They're a set, a promise."
Promise rings...
He pulls his own ring out of the box, twirling it between his fingers as he cups my cheek. "Last week, when I thought that I'd have to walk away from you... it fucking killed me. I felt so fucking lost, but then when you told me that it would never happen, when you promised me that we'd never be apart, I realised I wanted to make you a promise too."
He reaches up, the light of the lamp in his room bouncing off the inside of the ring and showing me the perfect inscription.
'You are my stars'
"You're mine Josh, you are my heart and you are my happiness. You are the reason that I smile and the person that I truly believe was put on this earth for me... You are my stars, this is my promise that we will always be this. That no matter what shit is thrown at us, that will never change."
This... Fuck, this is the most beautiful thing that anyone has ever done for me.
It's perfect. It's exactly who we are, something that doesn't have a label or conforms to what other people feel a relationship should be.
We are bonded by nothing else than our promise to fucking love each other. A promise that can never be broken as long as we don't let it.
Miles slips his ring straight onto his finger, no hesitation in him as he picks the one out of the box sitting on my shaking hand, placing the box on the floor and flipping my palm over to rest the ring at the tip of my own.
He stops, looking up at me with those eyes. They are the reason we got into this mess, they are what started this all. I could never say no to him when he looks at me like this.
"Do you promise Josh?"
Right now, looking at him holding my hand ready to slip a ring onto my finger, I can promise one thing entirely:
One day I'm going to marry Milo Thompson.
"I promise." Of course I fucking promise.
He presses the ring onto my finger until it's sitting perfectly at the top like it was always made for me.
I guess it fucking was.
"I love you." I barely manage to whisper the words, pulling him into my arms and letting my face snuggle into the side of his neck. I'd kiss him but I'm still fucking trembling too much, I just need him against me.
"You know," He smiles against my skin, "I don't think I'm ever going to get used to saying that, it still makes my stomach flip with butterflies every fucking time."
He's too fucking cute... I can't believe it took me so long to say it in the first place.
I reach my hands into his hair, pulling him down and kissing his cheek.
"Well I do... I love your heart," I kiss his other cheek, "I love your soul." I move him to look at me and kiss the tip of his nose. "I love the way you love everyone around you so fucking selflessly," I reach up and kiss his forehead, "I love that you are the one that made the stars shine brightly for me again."
I pause, my lips just above the surface his as I look into his eyes. "I love you Miles, I'm so completely in love with you."
He breaks away and throws himself completely on top of me, not hesitating for a moment to kiss me like crazy as he interlocks our fingers and I feel the cold metal of his ring hit against my own.
He fucking promised himself to me now... There's no going back.
Of course our beautifully romantic moment is ruined when my head hits against the pile of Christmas presents behind me and I'm pretty sure I just knocked myself out on the glass cage surrounding his basketball.
Ow... That fucking hurt...
"Shit!" He chuckles, sitting us back up and rubbing his hand against the back of my now swelling head. "Are you okay babe?"
Is it okay that every time he calls me that it just makes every hair on my body stand on fucking end? Nobody else calling me that word has ever had that effect.
"I'm good," I respond, trying to feel for the cartoon lump that's about to spring from the back of my skull. "Need help putting this stuff away?"
He shakes his head, placing his lips down right at the point where I hurt and instantly soothing away any trace of pain.
Wow, that actually fucking works...
I literally have to clench my hands into fists at my side when he starts just piling all his shit up on his desk, practically playing his very own game of fucking Tetris as he balances each box.
You are so fucking messy...
He grabs the last box from behind me, a Lego set that his mother got him, but instead of putting it on the desk he opens the closet and slots it straight on a shelf where I see there are about ten others still in their boxes.
"Does she get you one of them every year or something?" Miles nods, his cheeks seriously heating up more than they should for something like this. "Why don't you just tell her that you don't use them?"
He sighs, closing the door of his closet and falling against it whilst trying to avoid eye contact with me.
"If I tell you then you'll laugh." Oh my God, could he be any cuter right now? Look how red he is!
"I promise not to laugh." I'm absolutely fucking lying.
Miles scratches nervously at the back of his head, running his fingertips down his face and finally turning to face me.
"Basically... I kind of... I used too... Okay fine! I used to ask her for them every fucking year because when you came over you would always build them with me, I thought if I always had a new one for Christmas then you would always make it with me, so I asked her for them repeatedly and now she thinks I'm obsessed with the things and I couldn't exactly tell her the truth back then to correct her! You happy?" He shuffles the words out quicker than I can possibly process before gasping for air.
Turns out I was wrong, he could get fucking cuter.
He turns, ready to run away and hide through his embarrassment but honestly I just think he got that much fucking sweeter to me. Does he seriously not see how adorable he is right now?
I should have done more, been there for him more. I can't turn back time, but I can be there for him every fucking day from this one forward.
Starting right now.
I grab his wrist and pull him straight down on top of me, falling back onto the matt black bedding, this time thankfully not smacking my fucking head as I immediately part his lips and start to stroke his tongue with my own.
I fucking love you.
There's no way he can possibly ever understand what he does to me. I wish I could be as free and loving as he is, live without fear or regret. I've been so much better since I've been with him, he's made me the best version of myself, but he's still who I aspire to be.
I hope our kids are exactly like him, I want them to have his heart and his never ending capacity for love, his soul and to share in the way he only ever wants the best for everyone around him.
Miles slips his fingers under the hem of my shirt, disconnecting our lips so he can pull it over my head. I know what he's thinking but that can't fucking happen tonight, it really can't.
I love him, but I love my back not being broken by Cole just a tiny bit more.
"Miles..." He looks up from his position kissing my neck, meeting my eyes and smiling in a way that lets me know he knew exactly what he was fucking doing here. The towel that was wrapped around his waist slowly undoing and slipping away, but I don't even let myself look down further than his face. "You know that we can't do that tonight... This house is full and there's no way that nobody would fucking hear us."
He opens his mouth but I place my finger straight on it to stop the words leaving before they get the chance. He smirking again, which probably means he was about to tell me that he didn't give a fuck, which wouldn't surprise me in the slightest but I can't let him fuck my brains out knowing that Jayce is probably still awake in the room next door.
"Okay... Fine... No problem."
Nope, that was too easy...
He's setting me up isn't he? I will not fall into your traps Milo Thompson... I don't think.
Be strong Josh. Be strong.
He lifts himself up from my body, slipping off the mattress and gripping onto the very corners of the towel so that as he walks away I can see the bouncing tops of his globes above the lowering fabric.
He's doing it on purpose. He knows that I can't resist that fucking ass of his... Damn it Miles.
I'm not giving into this. I'm not...
Taking a pair of boxers from the drawer, he fakes struggling to get them on, eventually just letting the towel full to the floor right in front of me before pulling them up way too fucking slowly over his body.
Those have to be the smallest and fucking tightest boxers he fucking owns. Combining them with how firm his muscles look after playing fucking ball earlier for so long today, he definitely has no plans to make this fucking easy for me.
"Do you want to watch a movie or something?" He asks innocently, leaning against the drawers and stretching to pop every ab in his stomach.
Stop it.
I know what you're doing, and it's not going to work. Stop it.
"Yeah, sure." I strip down to my underwear far too quickly and climb into the sheets. That scent of him is so strong on these... Fuck, it's like being wrapped up in his fucking body.
Those three days where he didn't sleep next to me felt like a fucking eternity, I was in hell. I couldn't sleep at all unless I was clutching the pillow he usually stays on, his lingering scent all that allowed me even a moments rest.
Miles starts looking around the room for the TV remote, although why he thought it would be in the bottom drawer of his desk makes no sense to me. I mean, who would keep a remote somewhere where you would have to bend down so far...
Oh that little fucker.
I practically growl as I flip my body to look in the opposite direction of anything but that glorious fucking peach of his. He might as well be butt fucking naked with how tight his underwear is as he continues to bend deeply into that fucking drawer, when I open my eyes I realise the remote is quite conveniently placed on the bedside table right next to me!
"Miles." He twists and smiles at me as I wave the remote towards him, stretching over and slipping into the sheet next to me. For a second I think I'm safe, until he immediately lowers his hand to the apex of my thigh and starts running circles on my skin with his thumb.
Fuck.
It's something he's done so many fucking times before, but his grip is that much stronger now, I can feel the intention in the motion despite his face trying to act blasé as he scans through the movies.
Please stop it.
"What do you want to watch?"
You down my throat.
"I don't mind."
For fucks sake Josh, get a fucking handle on yourself.
Paying no attention whatsoever to whatever movie he's just put on, all that floods my senses is the feeling of his fingers slipping under the band of my boxers and stroking in the crease between my thigh and my pelvis. Two inches to the left and he will be stroking my fucking dick...
"I'm going to sleep." I fucking have to, the images he's making run around and around in my head right now are not fucking healthy.
He can't win... No... It's not fair! He always fucking wins!
Miles leans over and kisses me, not deep or long but sweet and soft, his hand slipping even further under the fabric of my boxers until his fingertips are brushing the skin just at the side of my hilt... Then he stops, but doesn't move out of the area.
"Goodnight Josh." He lays back down on the pillow, guiding my body onto its side so that his chest is pressing solidly against my back. This position is usually the relaxing embrace that I fall asleep in, but as his breath brushes against the nape of my neck, I feel the furthest thing from fucking relaxed.
Ignore it Josh, ignore the sexy fucking basketball player.
But then he does the one thing that sparks a million fucking memories, his lips gently pressing against the soft skin at the back of my neck. It's not a kiss, it's just a touch. The exact same way and the exact same place that he brushed his lips against my skin that very first night we fell asleep together...
Fuck, was that even an accident back then?
I always assumed it was inadvertent, but now... Fuck, he really fucking did it didn't he? Came that close to fucking kissing me...
"Miles..."
"Go to sleep Joshua." Don't use my fucking name like that.
His hand slips out from my underwear, stroking instead over the surface and brushing his fingertips against my length before trickling them up onto my stomach, slowly guiding them through every curve and line of my muscles before they reach my chest.
For anyone else, they'd think this was just the innocent affections of someone trying to lull their partner into a dream filled sleep, but I know fucking better. Just as his lips press down smoothly against my neck again, his thumb swipes over my nipple.
Oh fuck...
I lose all sense of even pretending to sleep, still letting my eyes fall closed but no longer holding myself away from his touch. I'm trying my best not to fucking react but one part of me refuses to listen, as I solidifies completely in my pants.
Traitorous dick.
His fingers twirl steadily around my bud, pressing it in then pinching it sharply, before soothing away the ache again as his chest embraces my back more firmly and I feel his solid length against my cheeks.
Oh I am truly fucked here.
I level back against his tool, my body acting on instinct when it comes to his. He's impossible to fucking fight, his fingers letting go of my nipple just long enough for him to lick the tips before he brings them back again. Before I even know what's fucking happening, tender moans are leaving my lips.
"Are you sure you want me to stop Josh?" His tongue gently runs it's tip from my shoulder all the way up my neck, until it is guiding itself around the cuff of my ear, dipping in and pressing against the inside with delicate flicks.
Oh fuck, that feels good... That feels...
Then suddenly he stops.
"Actually, you're right, guess we should just go to sleep."
Is he fucking kidding?
His whole body twists so fast that he takes half the fucking covers with him, turning onto his opposite hip and abandoning me completely as he faces out over the other side of the bed.
I'm going too... Fuck.
I fall onto my back, I'm so fucking turned on now that I can hardly fucking concentrate, but even with his back to me I can still tell he's fucking smiling.
Oh that's how you want to play it?
Fine.
But you can be the one to explain to your brother why you were screaming my fucking name all night.
Sorry Cole. He's asking for it.
I debate for a moment on being soft and sweet, leading him into that same stage of heat I now find myself in, but really what I want to do is put him in his fucking place.
It's my turn to fucking dominate.
Grabbing hold of his waist with a tight enough grip I'll be surprised if he doesn't have bruises in the morning, I pull him onto his back at the same moment I slip myself on top of him, ripping open his jaw and slipping my tongue into his mouth before our lips have even had the chance to truly connect.
This kiss is far more aggressive than one we've ever shared before, but I'm not going to give him the opportunity to try and claw back control from me. If I give him an out he'll take it, I've let him have me as he wanted, now I'm going to take him as I fucking want.
"J-Jo-" He tries to moan through the kiss but I don't even allow him that.
You need to remember Miles, you have possession over me only because I fucking let you. I'm ten years fucking older than you, if I want to be your master, I fucking will.
I don't mirror the rough pressure of the kiss with my hands, instead trailing them up over his body smoothly until I'm holding onto his chest so that he's unable to escape from below me. I'm more than surprised that he hasn't tried to move yet, but I think I've caught him off guard, I've never been like this with him before.
He shivers under my touch, those same shivers turning into shakes as I start to twirl my thumbs around and around his erect nipples, pushing in the sensitive buds and letting them spring free again as he moans delicately into my mouth.
You are mine.
Forcing his legs open, I slip my knee between them and begin rubbing against his raging erection, only forcing his moans to grow louder as they continue to be swallowed by my mouth. You shouldn't have played with me Miles...
He grows even more below me, all that stands between my skin and his is the thin fabric of his boxers that's becoming more and more damp with every forceful thrust of my tongue against his.
He disconnects the kiss completely and growls out into the room when I let go of his sensitive nipples and drag my nails down his chest over his stomach, leaving pink claw marks littering his skin.
Our eyes connect, I search his for even the slightest hint of doubt or misgiving, I don't want to push him too far too fast, but all I see in them is fire. He's burning with raw fucking desire for me, surrendering himself to my dominance like a good little boy...
Fuck, where the fuck did that come from? I sound like I'm his...
He whimpers and pleads as I continue to grind myself down against his stiff rod, those pleas only becoming worse when I remove my leg and start to palm him through the fabric of his boxers just as I take his nipple into my mouth.
I fucking love him like this, a panting fucking mess that doesn't know where I'm going to attack him next.
He'd let me do anything to him right now...
My tongue laps at his cute little bud, flicking it with the tip and watching him bite his lip so hard I wouldn't be surprised to see fucking blood. They're already so swollen from the aggressive kiss, but watching him like this is just making me want to kiss him again.
I always want to fucking kiss him.
My hand slips inside the fabric of his underwear, skimming over his length that is already so perfectly fucking wet with pre-cum. I really want these fucking boxers off him but I know if I move right now then he's going to try and recapture some of this dominance...
So I guess I'll do the only thing I can...
Grabbing hold of the waistband of his underwear with both hands, the sound of tearing fabric snaps him from his trance, as his cock springs free through the tattered scraps.
That's better.
"Did you just-" I cut off the question we both know the answer to by smacking my lips down onto his.
Yes I just tore my way into your fucking boxers Miles, and you fucking loved it.
He reaches up to place his hand behind my neck, but I don't even want to give him that, now that I have control over him I'm not giving it fucking back until I'm finished.
Instead, I take his wrist from my body and slam it down on the pillow above his head, grasping his length in my fist and starting to pump him slowly as our chests begin to stick together under a thin layer of sweat.
"You drive me crazy Miles... The things that I want to do to you... I've never wanted to do them to anyone else... I fucking crave you."
He can't respond, he doesn't have to when he's making those noises, his moans so fucking passionate as I move my lips to his neck.
I still have the after bruising of all the hickeys he likes to leave on my body, but the one I gave him at the beach house has faded completely.
I should rectify that.
Swiping my thumb over his tip, his hips thrust upwards into my fist at the moment my teeth clamp down on that space between his neck and shoulder. He tastes so fucking good. Heavy satisfying moans echo throughout his chest and vibrate around the room as he starts to lose himself below me.
His eyes close and any of the fight he was planning on putting up disappears completely as I destroy every blood vessel below the surface of his skin, leaving my intense purple mark for the world to see.
Mine. This man right here, no one else can have him. He belongs to me.
I hadn't realised how hard I was still pumping him until I sit up to look at my handiwork on his skin, only to see him writhing with building pleasure below me.
Oh fuck, he's gonna...
His eyes roll back into his head as I watch his body completely unload onto his stomach.
Watching him cum is my fucking favourite thing to do. I've never seen anyone look as fucking beautiful in the throes of satisfaction as him, he's perfect.
He collapses back into the pillow, I can tell a small part of him is kind of fucking embarrassed at how easily I was able to do that but I'm going to take it as a fucking compliment. His body losing control under my touch the way that mine does with his, that's never a bad thing.
His white sticky essence coats his protruding abs, his hazy hazel eyes turning glassy when he looks up into my own.
He really is my gorgeous mess.
He continues to maintain eye contact with me as I lower my lips to his chest, kissing every inch of skin I can attach them to, moving further and further down until I reach his puddle of completion. His lip firmly finds itself between his pearly white teeth as my tongue slips out and trails itself straight through his essence.
"Fuck Josh..."
He tastes so fucking good.
By the time he's managed to force himself up onto his elbows, his eyes widen with fucking desire at the vision of my tongue and lips coated in his cum. They only continue to grow as I travel further and further down his body.
"Josh... You can't-" His whole being launches up off the bed as I kiss his extremely sensitive tip, his words cut off by a quiet cry, but it doesn't make me stop.
I don't want to stop. He doesn't want me to stop.
Even as he pleads with me that he's still too fucking sensitive, I don't stop, grabbing his thighs with my large hands and spreading them wide open before continuing to kiss down his length.
When I reach his hilt, and place my tongue flat against his rod, he shoots back up from the bed.
"Josh! I can't... I'm not..." I watch him struggling for words as his length stiffens between our conjoined eye contact.
"I think you can Miles..." I suck just at the point between his dick and his balls, forcing him to throw himself back down onto the pillow with a satisfied whimper. "Look how fucking hard you are again already..."
Oh, to be this young.
He really is still so sensitive, when I run my tongue back up his length and swirl at his tip he's practically fucking convulsing. Instead, I give him a minute, sucking one of his balls as his hands start to claw over his own chest.
I thought I was being rough with him, but he's so much rougher with himself.
Fuck... It's such a fucking turn on.
His legs spread even wider, I know what he really wants so I slip my hands under his hips, tilting them up to face me and opening up his cheeks before guiding my tongue down straight between them.
"Josh... Fuck..."
There are so many perfect fucking areas of his body that bring him pleasure, things he'd never felt before me. He's given me so much of himself that he's never given to anyone else, a privilege that is not lost on me.
I twirl and tease at his little hole, listening to him burst with a melody of euphoria as he digs the heels of his palms into his eyes to try and block out anything but the pleasure that I am giving him.
Louder Miles, I want you to be louder.
Let go.
My fingertips gently glide up and down his length, trying to seek out the moment that he's ready for me to give him more. When the whimpers of sensitivity make room for groans of bliss, I take the opportunity to grab his tip in my fist, passionately embracing it and caressing it with my thumb at the same time I start to gently fuck him with my tongue.
"Ahhh... J-Josh!" That's better.
His strong thighs quiver at either side of my head, he's so fucking precious when he falls apart, right now he's such a fucking wreck that I don't think he even knows where the fuck he is anymore.
He twitches every time I hit the perfect spot, so I can't stop myself from doing it again and again just to relive the sensation of him clenching and thrusting against me. I could do this all fucking day to him, bring him closer and closer to losing his fucking mind before edging away and starting all over again.
There's a part of him that loves it too, he's a natural at being in control because that's who he's always had to be, but there's something so satisfying about allowing someone else to take care of you sometimes, surrendering yourself to another person and letting go of the charge so you can just lose yourself in them.
I gently slip my tongue up between his cheeks, smothering his balls in my affection before guiding it along his staff until it reaches the tip. He lets out the loudest groan of pleasure, but now I'm up closer I can hear just how fucking loud he really is, so I have no choice but to shove my fingers into his mouth to try and quieten him down.
His face turn the sweetest shade of red when I travel back down the path I just set, forcing his knees into his chest so that my fingers never have to leave his mouth. He's surrendered, letting me mould and please him how I want.
Fuck it feels good.
He moans around them but the sound is muffled as I caress every sensitive point of his manhood with my desperate tongue.
Finally, when I feel he has some control over his own voice again, I slip my fingers out from between his lips, but the words that follow them make me pause instantly.
"Fuck me."
Fuck...
I look down at my own sword straining against the fabric of my underwear, the cloth damp with the leaking fluids that have resulted from watching him get like this.
He probably doesn't mean... He means...
Moving my drenched fingers between our bodies, I press them against his dripping hole, encompassing his length with my lips and sucking it into my mouth as I gently press two fingers into him.
He takes them willingly, he's learnt to relax over the time we've been together, so now there's no hesitation in him as I slowly pull out and push back in again, curling to find that spot that makes his eyes slip into his head.
Oh those fucking moans... He's fucking killing me.
His length swells in my mouth with every thrust of my hand, as I push in again his back arches up off the bed and I know I found what I was looking for.
"J-Joshhh..." I've got you Miles, I can give you everything you need.
This time I try my luck with three, surprising both of us when they slip in so easily. His moans becoming even stronger with each forceful thrust as I stroke against his prostate and feel him stretching to accommodate even more.
He's getting close again, my own hand wants to slip inside my underwear so I can experience the same high at that approaching moment, but this isn't about me right now.
My hollow cheeks stroke against his length until my lips press against his pelvis, his whole body shaking now as I overload him with pleasure but when I bob my head back up to his tip both his hands come out to grab hold of my face and tear it free of his body until we meet eye to eye. His closed so I can't even read them.
"Miles?" Fuck, did I hurt him?
I pause everything else, slipping out of him until it's just our skin that's pressed together as he holds my forehead to his. Shit, is he okay?
His eyes finally open but the fire that was in them earlier is dying down and making room for something else, that same look in his eye that he gets sometimes when I take hold of his hand or pull him onto my chest on the couch.
Love.
"Josh..." He begins, his whispers so quiet in comparison with the noises that were coming out of him only moments before. "That's not what I want, I want you... All of you."
My stars... Fuck.
"Miles, you don't have to do that. I'm not expecting that from you." I fucking love him, this isn't something that I want him to feel he has to do. "I know last week was shit, if you're feeling afraid or–"
"I'm not afraid." He replies gently, his fingers weaving into the back of my hair. "I'm in love. I'm so fucking in love with you, I've never felt the need to be with anyone the way I do with you... I want you to have this. I want you to be the only person to have a part of me that no one else ever will."
Miles...
He's practically offering me his virginity here.
He's been with girls before, I'm not fucking stupid and I realise that, but this is different. This isn't just us uniting our bodies, it's him offering me a part of his soul that he'll never be able to offer anybody else.
"I want to be yours Josh," his husky voice brushes his breath against my lips as he forces my underwear down my thighs. "I've always been yours, please... keep me."
You are too fucking precious for this world.
All the aggression of my actions before this point get lost, this isn't about fucking dominance anymore, this is about him giving me something he never thought he even had to give.
"I won't fuck you Miles." His eyes never leave mine and I can see the pain in them at my rejection, but I quickly place my hand on his cheek, stroking over his high cheekbones and smiling before I press my lips gently to his. "I'm going to make love to you."
Then maybe after that...
We'll see.
He pulls me down into a open mouth, deep kiss, not breaking it even when I start digging around in the drawer next to us for the bottle that I need.
I don't want to hurt him, I know I'll need to for a moment but I want to do everything I can to fucking prevent that. I smother us both in the thick liquid, allowing him some power back in the kiss before looping my arms around his waist and guiding him with me as I gently sit back against the headboard with him on my lap.
I'm pretty sure if I was hovering over him and he had no choice but to lay there and take it, it would only rile up his anxiety. That leaves me with two options; laying him on his stomach, which I'm not completely against, but at least with him on top he's got the control he needs... and I get to kiss him.
His chest brushes against mine, I'm not sure at what point he turned the movie off but now the only light in the room filters in from the moon outside through the gap at the centre of the curtains. Night is truly upon us, but it doesn't change the glow in his eyes as he gently grinds down against me, both his hands locked behind my neck as I kiss him with everything I have.
"Miles, if you want to stop we can."
"I know... I don't want to."
He's so fucking beautiful, the way he's so fucking sure and confident in everything he does, there's never any insecurity in him.
When I grow up, I want to be Milo Thompson.
I hold his hips firmly, guiding him so that my tip is pressed against his body, but never pushing in, that choice is his.
He continues to kiss me, allowing our lips to reassure each other in every way, but when he starts to lower himself down against me, I pull back just a tiny amount.
"Go slow... I won't move until you tell me to." He nods, pressing his forehead against mine so that I can feel the shake that is starting to make its way through his body.
He has to have some nerves, I was a fucking wreck my first time.
His thighs tense as he lowers himself down until my tip slips inside him, oh fuck, he feels so fucking good. My body wants to thrust up and embrace every fucking part of him but I'd never let that happen... Even if he does feel like he was fucking made for me.
Fuck you're perfect...
"Fuck..." He winces, his head falling from mine into the crook of my neck as he bites down on my shoulder. I don't stop him, I embrace the pain completely in the same way that I know he is. It's taking everything I fucking have not to pull out and end his suffering, but I know that he'd never forgive me if I did, he wants this.
"Breathe Miles, you have to breathe." His hands drop from my neck, his nails digging into the back of my shoulder blades as he breathes through every inch he allows his body to take. His teeth still graze against my skin but I make sure to wrap my arms around him completely, ignoring the overwhelming pleasure that his body is bringing mine wrapped around it so tightly, and focusing on doing everything I can to bring him some peace.
"I thought this was supposed to feel..." I stroke his hair, pressing my lips to the side of his neck.
"It will, just keep breathing." He follows my instruction, lowering himself even further until finally he reaches my lap, allowing himself the full lung of oxygen that he so desperately needs at the moment I find myself within him completely.
Fuck, he feels good. He feels so fucking good.
It's taking every fucking ounce of strength I have not to moan right now, tiny ones keep escaping through my lips no matter how much I try to hold them back, he's just so fucking tight. Even sitting here perfectly still feels better than anything else I've ever fucking experienced.
"Miles, are you okay?" I ask with clear concern at the fact he still can't seem to open his eyes properly.
"Yeah, I'm just-" His words get cut off as he tries to sit up and inadvertently grinds himself down against me, I can't stop the sound of pleasure slipping off my tongue, but he doesn't stop his either. Both of us connecting our eyes as he suddenly realises the pleasures awaiting him.
That's right Miles... I told you... You just needed to breathe.
I let go of one of his hips, finding his hand and interlocking it with mine before bringing it to my lips, keeping my eyes connected with him and asking him for permission to make even the smallest movement. He nods and I gently roll my hips in the smallest circle, even that tiny rotation brushing at his never before explored cavern leaves both of us weak at the fucking knees.
"Fuck, do that again." He tears his hand away from mine, gripping onto both my shoulders for support as I recapture his hips and this time move them with me as I grind circles inside of him. "Fuck that feels good."
There's my man.
This time I slowly raise his hips, only pulling myself halfway out before pushing him back down to take me fully. There's a slight grimace on his face, but the next time I do it, it disappears completely. By the third he's raising himself up further before slamming himself back down against me.
"Fuck Miles!" I'm trying to go slow, I swear to fuck I am, but he's lifting himself up and forcing me back inside him quicker and quicker like he's been doing it his whole fucking life.
One of his hands leaves my shoulder, placing the palm flat against the headboard for more support when he lifts himself until all that sits within him is my tip, thrusting me back in deep in one fluid fucking motion.
He doesn't want it slow Josh. He wasn't built that way.
The next time he lifts himself up, I wait until he starts to lower himself again raising my hips and meeting him in a thrust that leaves me deeper within his body than I've ever been before. His head throws itself back, every swear word I think I've ever heard seeping out of his mouth as his eyes fall closed whilst facing up at his ceiling.
"Josh, fuck... again."
I do it again, and again, his speed increasing between each thrust until I'm leaving the imprint of my hands on his hips as I force him down onto me.
Of course he'd be fucking incredible at this too, there's no fucking end to his talents.
His solid dick brushes against my stomach with each glorious movement, coating it with everything that's dripping from the tip. If I could take him in my mouth right now, I would.
My hand slides up over his chest, worshiping his skin, pausing for a moment to feel his racing heart before grabbing hold of his throat and bringing his lips back to mine.
I love you, fuck I love you.
I dig my heels into the mattress, angling my hips and thrusting back into him with a slight tilt that I know will hit exactly where I fucking want it to.
"Josh!" His teeth clamp down on my bottom lip, pleasure overtaking his face as his tip leaks all over me with every thrust I continue to smash against that very spot.
"I love you Miles." I'm not sure he can even hear me any more as I grip around back and force him flat against me so that I can control our rhythm, the pleasure almost so much that I have to hold his head down into the crook of my neck just too muffle the screams he's no longer in control of.
He's already so close, but when his hand slips between our bodies and starts to pump his ever growing length I feel myself fucking lose it. Watching him only increase his pleasure unleashes something I didn't know I had inside me, flipping us so that I'm on top of him despite my earlier misgivings.
That was a mistake, look how perfect he looks under you.
His eyes meet mine; love, desire and fucking need all undisciplined and exposed within them.
I want you Miles, I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone. I want you to be the man I open my eyes too every morning, the man I let lay in while I take our kids to school, the man sitting next to me on our deck; old and grey in our rocking chairs but so fucking in love it doesn't even fucking matter how many years it's been.
Be my everything. Be my forever.
Be my promise.
Be my stars.
There's no hesitation in him, like he can read my minds words he reaches up and captures my lips. He kisses me until we both gasp for breath, the fire in his eyes when he looks down at our connected bodies only flaring me up all over again.
Fuck, how the fuck did I get this man? Someone I love and respect more than anyone else, yet someone my body is animalistic with in it's need to please every time I'm fucking near him.
He relaxes below me, his comfort level at a point that he even wraps his legs around my waist to give me greater access to him as I draw back and pummel into his tight little hole all over again.
"J-Josh..."
His head throws itself back, slipping off the end of the mattress and hanging upside down as he releases his cries into the room, leaving his throat completely exposed as I suck and kiss the delicate flesh.
"Josh..."
"I fucking love you Miles." My thrusts start to become more erratic as I feel us both nearing our edge, his whole body jerking as I smash against his pleasure spot each time.
"Josh!" Fuck.
"Who am I Miles?"
"Joshua!" His dick swells so much that his hands lets it go completely, his limbs falling to his sides before reaching up to claw at my back as I drive myself in even harder.
"Say it again..." I have no fucking idea where this side of me is coming from, but he fucking likes it.
"J-Joshua..." His words are barely audible through all his panting, he's completely at my mercy. In my control. I'm his...
I grab him by his hair, forcing his face up to meet mine, the dazed look in his eyes from the blood rushing to his head in that position only making him look that much more fucking glorious.
"What am I Miles?" He moans with even more pleasure as I pull his body against mine and bury myself deep within him.
"Jos-"
"No, what am I?!" I watch his eyes light up, the word sitting on the tip of his tongue as I deliver a round of short sharp thrusts directly against that fucking pleasing area, my own body becoming riddled with delight as the bliss starts to takeover us both.
"You're..."
"Say it." I pull myself almost completely out of him, angling towards what I know will be the final thrust required for both of us to unload completely.
His lip gets sucked between his teeth, his hand weekly coming up to push against the back of my head and bring mine to his, both of us sinking completely into each others hold before he pulls back and looks directly into my eyes.
"Da-"
I slam into him with more force than either of us thought possible, cutting him off but enjoying the look of absolute euphoria on his face as streams of cum shoot from his tip so hard they cover us both entirely, my arms shaking as with one final thrust I find myself coating his internal walls with my escaping seed.
Fuck... Fuck, I just...
His body vibrates like crazy, not a single one of his limbs with any energy left as he collapses completely into the mattress. I did that to him, fuck I did that to him.
His chest heaves, the cries of sheer unadulterated joy that have been screaming their ways through his lips finally cease, until the room becomes silent, only our conjoined panting breaths any sign that anybody is still alive in here.
He was... That was... There are no words for what that felt like. I didn't know it was possible to love him more but I think I fucking do now.
I guide myself out of him slowly, almost getting hard all over again when I watch my cum trickle out of him.
Fuck, that was too fucking good.
I didn't mean to go that hard with him his first time... Fuck, something about seeing him like that just took over all rational thoughts in my mind and it was like my body was reacting to everything I knew deep down he wanted.
Look at his face Josh... Look how fucking happy he is.
Delicately guiding his head back onto the bed, I keep hold of his body until I can pull him completely into my arms. Both of us getting in an absolute mess and ruining these fucking sheets but I don't think either of us fucking care right now.
He tries to lift his head to face me, but exhaustion is calling out to him too strongly, all he can do is gently press his lips against my collar bone before relaxing against my chest once more. Both our hearts pound in what seems to be the same drum beat, like a song that was written just for us.
"Are you okay?" He looks happy but I know tomorrow will be another fucking story. He is definitely going to feel that.
Reaching across my stomach, he finds my hand and links it with his, our rings brushing together as he bring them back over to his lips.
"I'm perfect." He whispers, gently pressing his lips again against my ring.
He really fucking is.
We both just lay here, neither of us in any rush to leave the bubble we've created around ourselves. A cool breeze gently guides itself in through the open window, his skin becoming coated in tiny cold bumps before I attempt to pull the blanket back over him.
"You are my stars, I need you to know that no matter what happens Miles, you will always be my stars."
We've never fought, we've never really even been angry at each other. I know one day that will happen and I just hope that during those low moments he thinks back on this time right here; his hand connected with mine, our hearts in a conjoined rhythm, the love we have for each other a protective shield that will always be with both of us.
Because it will never take much for us to get back to this. It's where we're meant to be.
He slowly lifts himself up, resting his forehead against mine and allowing our breaths to mix together before he touches my lips.
"I know that Josh, we made a promise." Damn fucking right we did.
His hands fall down my body, stroking over every inch of my skin until they reach my waist. He clenches me in the same way I did him, before I'm launched away from his lips with his strong arms twisting me until I land flat on my stomach, my head nestled between the pillows in the middle of the bed.
What the fuck is he doing?
He follows mine with his, swinging his legs over my hips and letting his body lay down on mine until his chest is pressed against my back and he's grabbing that little bottle off the side table.
"But I also make you another promise right now; I promise to never let a day go past Joshua Jones where I don't leave you completely... and utterly.. satisfied."
Oh fuck.
He pulls back slightly, lifting my hips and slipping a pillow beneath them before I feel as both become smothered in gel, his tip angling itself right between my cheeks.
He pauses, laying back down against my body, our skins melding as he brings his lips right next to my ear.
His words coming out as nothing but a low, deep whisper...
"What am I Josh?"
Fuck.