He's A Pizza! (2/4 Lashton)

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luke-hxmmings thank you for reading all of our minds by asking 'Hey. What if the 5SOS boys were pizza?' I dedicate this chapter to you. The reason it's only 2 of them is.....just read Luke's and you'll see what I'm talking about xD

AshtonYou waited anxiously for the delivery person to come with your large pizza. You only ordered it 10 minutes ago, but you could still dream. You tried to take your mind off of it by watching a movie but your stomach kept interrupting you. Rude. 15 minutes later, the doorbell rang and you ran to the door in your sweats. You flung the door open and shoved the $20 into the dude's hand and ripped the box away from him and went back into your lair. The aroma was seeping (xD) with happiness and cheese. You set the box on your coffee table and opened it. "Holy mother of french toast." The pizza looked beautiful :') You rubbed your hands together and grabbed a slice and took a big bite. "Ohr mer gard." You said, mouth full. "Hey!!!! That's my elbow! I liked that elbow!" You heard a voice cry. You raised your eyebrows and muted the TV so you could eat in piece.  "Seriously!!! Stop!! You're damaging my goods!" The voice came again. You set down your slice and stared at it. "Nah. I'd be crazy to think that." You muttered and picked it back up. You took another bite and you heard a groan. "Man! How am I going to explain this to my mum?" You threw the pizza across the room and ran to grab a knife. "Who the hell is in my house?!" You yelled. "Well finally!!! I'm Ashton and you just ate part of me." You blinked and tightened your grip on the knife. "I'm sorry what?" You asked nearing the pizza box. "You. Ate. Me. I'm. Not. Happy." The male voice replied. "Ok are you saying you're my pizza?" You questioned, wondering if someone drugged the cheese. "Yes. That's exactly what I'm saying. Now stop eating me." You scoffed and set the knife down. "You can't tell me what to do dough boy. I can eat as much pizza as I want. I paid for it and I'm starving." You picked up another slice and brought it to your lips. "Don't do it. I'm warning you." He sang. "Psh. What's going to happen? I get a bad case of the 'I'm full'?"
1 Hour Later
"That's why I shouldn't have eaten it." You muttered as you stared at the ceiling. "I told you. Well now I have a buddy. I'm really digging your pepperoni." He said pointing out your new form. "Thanks. It's a pleasure to meat  you."

Luke"I like big crusts and I cannot lie! You other dough can't deny! When a tomato walks in with a little bit of paste and a sauce that's perfect taste you get cheese, wanna cover it nice coz you notice that crust was stuffed, beef and cheese is daring, I'm cooked and I can't stop staring. Oh baby I wanna go dip ya, in that sweet marinara. My onions tried to warn me but that pepperoni makes me so hungry! Ooh Canadian bacon you sayin you wanna get in my box, but no ma'am no ma'am coz we never need that much floppy ham. I see anchovies, to hell with those anchovies. Smell, hell got it stinking like a prison cell. I'm tired of bell peppers saying veggies are the thing, take the average pizza eater and ask them what, they gotta pack much meat. So peppers, yeah, peppers, yeah does your veggie got the stuff? Hell yeah! Bake it, bake it, bake it, bake it, bake that unhealthy stuff. Baby got snack." Luke sang loudly.

You groaned and rubbed your temples. "Luke if you don't stop singing that I will shut your box." You threatened. He became silent and he was just a normal pizza.

"Baby got snack. I like em round and big and when I'm throwing that pig on top I can't help myself I'm acting like a teenager. Now here's my wager. I wanna deliver you home and yum double stuff yum yum. I ain't talking bout Digorno coz plastic wrap is made for leftovers. I want em real thick and cheesy so bake that doughy bubble Luke Hemmings' in trouble begging for a slice of that yumm-el. So I'm looking at frozen vegetables, not even fresh coming from the store, you can have those icicles I'll keep my veggies like fresh oh. I wanna melt the cheese and crisp the crust to perfection, I won't burn or scald ya. But I gotta be in the oven now or I'll be here till the brink of dawn. Black olives got it going on, this is kind of a really weird song, a lot of people would tell me to shush it, but I'd rather keep annoying, coz I'm bored and I'm not Lorde, and I'm being delivered to the door. So eaters, yeah, eaters, yeah, you wanna pull up a seater? Yeah! Then open the door and hold your arms out, even 6 year olds know what it's about. Baby got snack."
You shut the box and shoved him in the fridge getting some piece and quiet.

(I  cannot  believe  I  spent  2  hours  writing  a  parody  of  Baby  Got  BackYou  guys  better  enjoy  itxD  I  hope  you  liked  part  1  Lashton!!!  Malum  will  be  up....sometimeThanks  luke-hxmmings  for  making  me  question  my  sanityLove  you!!!)

"Oh  my  god  Luke  xD"  -Ashton

"I'm  awesomeMY  BUTTERED  CRUST  WON'T  BE  DONE  TILL  I  GET  SOME  SUN!"  -Luke

"I  don't  even  know  how  to  react  to  that."  -Calum

"Bravo  LukeYou  have  pleased  meKeep  up  the  good  work."  -Michael  'Pizza  LordClifford

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