Mí Amour

172: Victim

Vier

I smiled as I saw Amour walking towards me as I stood in the airport.

"Amour!" I semi yelled running to her.

I tried to touch her but she flinched away and whimpered.

Her body looked sore and she was about to break down. She looked exhausted. Heartbroken. Afraid.

"Are you ok?" I tried to pull her into a hug but she flinched again and backed up a bit.

She shook her head and walked to my car. She got in and was silent.

I got in and drove home with her. I kept my distance for the rest of the day thinking about what happened to her and how it was all my fault.

***

I held her in my arms and fed her the oatmeal while she started falling half asleep.

"I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. I shoulda never left you." I said looking her in her low eyes.

She didn't say a word. I hadn't heard her voice since we were on the phone. It took me 2 days to find her and I won't leave or lose her again.

I didn't wanna hear her voice until I knew she wouldn't be scared or hurt anymore.

I had observed her body as I helped her wash up earlier. She had hand prints on her neck, back, arms, and face, abrasions on her ankles and wrists, and she flinched every time I touched her.

She finally closed her eyes and went to sleep.

I couldn't possibly wake her up by moving so I covered her with my jacket and watched her sleep. It was 3 AM when I fell asleep.

***

I woke up the next morning and she wasn't there. I got up and looked around for her. She was in the bed just laying there.

She didn't say anything but she looked like she had the world on her mind and she wanted to die for it.

"Good morning." I said standing next to her.

She looked at me and smiled a little.

"Are you ready to talk to me now? I'm getting kinda lonely and I miss your voice." I said grabbing her hand.

She flinched and then shrugged.

"Do you want anything?"

"Lucas..."

I looked down. I'd give everything up if she still loved Lucas.

"Dead." She finished.

"I can't do anything about that. He's in jail for awhile and I'm sure he won't bother you afterwards."

She sighed and looked away.

"Do you wanna get up now?"

"What's the point?" She said lowly.

"To live."

"What if I don't want to? I'm just here for you."

"You have a son, Amour. Chresanto's dead, Lucas is put away, now you just have to deal with me and I'm not a handful. You love me right?"

I grabbed the ring from the nightstand and slipped it on her finger. Then I kissed it.

She had chills.

"I'm scared Vier."

"For what?"

"I'm scared of love. Scared to love you. But I do."

"You act like you're scared of me."

"I am."

I raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"You can turn around and hurt me when you want to. I and I'll just end up depressed again."

"If you don't trust me anymore, I'll keep my distance." I gently put her hand down. "I'd never hurt you. I just wanna love you. I wanna keep my promises. Remember I promised to love you?"

She nodded.

"You're a beautiful woman. A beautiful rose that bloomed in a dark room. How impossible. Magical. Magical like the beauty in your blue eyes. Funny how these other niggas got you questioning my love for you. You should just know that I swear I'm always true. I promised I wouldn't leave you. I may have broken that and I hope you forgive me. My beautiful Amour. The only woman on this earth that I adore. More than life itself, I'd die for you so if you feel pain, don't take it out on yourself. Give it all to me. Nobody else. I'm your only love and I promise I belong to you. I'm yours only. I made the mistake of letting someone else mark your body in all the wrong ways. I'm jealous and angry at a decision. I was stupid but I guess it's alright now that I've got you. Don't worry about it. I got it. I'll stay up late at night making sure you're sleeping ok. Because you come first." I looked her in her eyes.

"I love you." She said lowly. "I never would've thought you existed. You're too good for me."

"No I'm not. I'm not perfect, Amour. You'd be too good for me if the same thing happened to me. But I don't care about your past. I wanna see you grow more and be happy because of me. I wanna give you the best life anyone could possibly ever have."

She was silent. I looked down and sighed.

"Do you want me to stay in here with you? Are you hungry? I can go out and... I can call an Über."

She nodded. "Please don't go."

I walked around the bed and sat in my side.

"So what do you want to eat?"

"What do you want?" She asked.

"Whatever you get is fine."

***

After eating, I sat on the edge of the bed and with no emotion.

Will she be alright? She barely ate anything.

"Vier?" She said lowly.

"Hmm, Queen?" I asked turning around.

"I'm sorry. I put you through a bunch of bullsh..."

"No Amour. It's ok. Sometimes when you love someone, you gotta go through hell and back and get through all the bullshit with them. Nobody said you ever had to be alone. And I personally feel like it's my fault and I didn't do enough, yet I did all that I could. I'm sorry Chresanto kidnapped you. I'm sorry he raped you. I'm sorry. I should be sorry. I'm not the victim."

"Come cuddle me."

"Anything for you. But I gotta go take a shower. Will you be alright in here?"

"Can I come?" She asked.

I nodded and helped her outta bed.