My diary 2

2.11.22💼

i have a hookup planned for this weekend..

work was okay today. the staff were very good especially towards the end when my favourite, scott came in. we talked about the new burger we have on the menu, he had it for his break and it was huge and even had a hash brown in????
there were two men on table 18 who i saw were having a long discussion with the pub manager vicky.
there was nobody at the bar and queue was forming.. so i called her on the radio but she never responded.
later on as the men left they were telling me about how horrible vicky was being to them over some scampi. i'm not sure exactly what happened but he was saying how he's owned a pub for 40 years and has never seen anything like it before
later on i find his wallet he left behind and i put it somewhere safe in case he comes back. scott told me that the men were saying bad stuff to vicky.. so i don't know. but i don't doubt that she was horrible

i asked over the radio to see vicky in her office about my shift in a week or two as i have a dentist appointment for the exact time it finishes.
so later once vicky finished her break she calls me into her office and we talk about the shift. she also brought up about that weekend i called in sick on... i didn't admit to anything but she definitely wasn't happy and said that if she'd of been in on that weekend she would've investigated
i gulped man
but i have half an hour less of work for the appointment anyway. i was afraid to ask seeming as i've had lots of time off recently

anyway that was work today. on my birthday i'm meeting eliza to take autumn themed photos for her instagram. i like eliza and i hope something comes of it. even if i do just take photos of her it'll be nice to have met her for the first time in a year or two

me and the group chat are fantasising about this 5 a side football game. i've asked a few people to go that aren't in the group chat too. i've already bought some really nice football boots
size 9 too. i didn't know what size i was until i looked at my shoes ngl. because a shoe shop said i was 6 and a half, but i look at my current shoes and 7 is too small for me. and 8 seems okay? but 9 has some space in for sure and they didn't sell 8.5 so i just bought size 9
they fit me well anyway. i'll just need to go out with jake to get used to them

oh there's also a family meal on the afternoon of my birthday. unfortunately my dad will be there but there's nothing i can do about that. i'm glad my grandparents are going too
it'll be the second time in the span of 2 weeks id of had alcohol with them as i had a glass of merlot at my uncle brian's funeral

so yeah i'm having to resort to having a hookup to lose my virginity. i just want to get it out of the way to be honest. it's taken too long and i'm so unlucky with relationships
once i've lost it i won't care so much about doing it ever again i don't think
he's not even too pretty either. i have self worth because i know my limits, i chose and pursued for this to happen. i've always wanted to say i've lost my v before 18 because of i say 23 it would make me seem as if there was a reason for that. ofc i'm not in a rush, it's just me wanting to get it out of the way.
in the gay world i am naturally a top. i have never even been in a gay relationship so i guess i'm testing the waters lol. i know i like black, latino guys. guys with spice and not some 31 year old looking greasy bearded mental case. this guy isn't like that at all
he's sweet, forward but honest and understanding
it's just the fact that i want to destroy his ass

goodnight