Change (Loki x Reader)

Chapter 8: A Flower

Mentions of Blood and Panic Attack

Y/N POV

The soft sound of rain trickling down my window was what lulled me to sleep that

night. I fell into darkness before opening my eyes into a dream.

No.

A Nightmare.

Blood took over my hands as I staggered through the dreaded corridors. I knew this place. I didn't want to. No one should. I hear the screams of the victims being strapped down into their chairs. I limp to each door searching for him.

Where was he?

I looked through the last door. There. In the pool of blackness he laid on a single bed under a white light. He shouldn't be here. None of them should. I raised my bleeding foot to change it into that of a tiger's. I bash the doors locked knob and staggered inside.

"NEWT!"

His sapphire blue eyes look up at me. No not sapphire. Not anymore. They were now pitch black. His porcelain skin was as grey as clouds and he was but skin and bone.

"Y-y/n,"

"Newt! It's ok, I'm here you're going to be okay," I say shaking.

I grab hold of the chains and try crush them in my dragon claw.

"Y/n you have to go!"

"No Newt I'm not leaving you I can't," tears flooded my eyes. I couldn't breathe.

My hands were drenched in blood as a clutched him tighter.

"Hey shhh, I'm going to be ok,"

"No no please don't go, I should never have told you,"

"Hey! Shhh don't cry, I'm happy I met you. I'm happy that you're my partner. I'm happy I got to call you sister," his as fluttered close as I held him tighter.

"NOO!!"

I start violently shaking him trying to wake him up. It can't end this way. No not now. I can't go back. Not without him.

Two gooey black hands grab hold of me and dragged me down into a pool of water.

I couldn't breathe. I tried to scream, I tried to move. But my body laid there paralysed. Useless. Weak. Pathetic. Broken.

I woke up drenched in sweat and tears. I clutched my chest and tried to catch a breath. Oxygen. What was it? It wasn't there.

I recalled what Nat told me to do when this sort of thing happened. Think of something that makes you feel warm on the inside. Like a flower, blossoming in a cold aching cave. Go to the flower, pick it up and hold it tight. Slowly walk out of the cave. Walk towards the light outside. Focus on it. Focus on the flower. Don't look back at the cold darkness. Instead look forwards.

I opened my tightly shut eyes.

The time was 3:03 as I crept out of my bed and into the bathroom. I washed my face with lovely warm water to cleanse me from the cold aching night. I looked at my figure through the mirror. I looked pale. Pale as him.

His face haunted the thoughts as I crept down the corridor and towards the elevator.

It should've been me.

Everyone feared something. Darkness, Clowns, Spiders. I feared that moment. That day. That month. I couldn't relive something like that never again. I was already but a broken shard of glass. I would be gone if was to break more.

I was lost in my thoughts. So lost that I didn't notice I was at the edge of the roof until a cold hand clutched my waist.

"Y/n!"

I looked up, startled, to see Loki. The cold night's air brushing his hair away from his horrified face.

"What in Valhalla are you doing?"

I looked down to see the bustling New York's streets under us.

"I-I. I'm sorry oh my god. I was thinking about something and then went up the elevator and then I-"

He stopped my rambling by gently placing his hand on my shoulder, "Look at me Y/n,"

I brought my eyes up to meet his glistening green eyes. The lights of the busy streets illuminating his face.

"I'm not mad. I was just scared. Scared that you were going to do something that Lady Natasha would have killed me for letting you do so,"

I let out a small laugh, "So were you scared for your wellbeing or mine?"

"Both," he said smirking.

He sat down on the landing on a concrete block and motioned me to do the same. We sat in comfortable silence until I broke it.

"What are you doing up here?"

"I could ask you the same,"

"I'll tell you if you tell me,"

He sighed and spoke, "I was just thinking about Asgard. My mother believed that I would be able to redeem myself by coming down here, so she convinced my father in letting me do so. I miss Asgard. I stay up here wondering what she is doing and if my father would have ever let me out of the dungeons,"

"I think he would have,"

"Well darling you don't know my father well," he said finally meeting my eyes, "I lived in Thor's shadow for many years of my life and I found out why a few years ago,"

I looked at him patiently, but he simply sighed and shook his head, "It's something I don't want to disclose in the current moment,"

I smiled and spoke, "It's ok, like a promised. When I feel up to telling you about my past you'll tell me yours,"

He offered a gentle smile before asking, "Why are you awake at such a late hour Lady Y/n?"

"I had a n-nightmare," I turned my head away waiting for him to mock at me.

"I have them too. They are nothing to be ashamed of,"

I looked at him and smiled.

We sat in silence for another hour before heading down to our separate rooms.

Something blossomed inside. A flower. A flower to pull me out of this cave.

I hope this chapter was good. It was a late one but I hope you enjoyed it. Pls do comment and vote cus i love reading your comments and ideas. Who do you think Newt is? Thank for the support and I hope you have a lovely week.

Lots of Love

SigynFan