Peter Parker and the Avengers one shots

Russian Class

For Theassassinprincess

For a while now, Natasha had been teaching Peter a few bits of Russian, until one day she decided to give him full phrases.

And since Peter was a quick learner, he picked it up fluently in two months. He, Bucky and Natasha would have private conversations, even (mainly Nat and Bucky) death staring at some of the other people in the house, and talking in Russian, about anything and everything.

This wasn't an issue, until the next school year started. Peter's class got to learn a new language. And whoop-de-doo, it was Russian.

"Welcome Class. I am your Russian teacher, Mrs Vandewolf. I will teach you Russian for the next two years." Said their scary new teacher.

Peter internally groaned. He was already fluent in Russian, but nobody could know that! People would wonder why, they'd ask May, who had kicked him out! She'd rat him out, Tony would get into trouble, and Peter's secret would be out.

For 3/4 of the term, Peter flunked the tests, messed up the vocal exams, and purposely misspelled words. Until, he didn't.

He had been on patrol over his curfew the last night, as he had been shot and couldn't call for help. Tony found him, sprawled out in the alley behind Delmars at a quarter to three AM, unconscious with two bullets in his shoulder.

Tony had rushed Peter back to Bruce, who had patched him back up. Peter had slipped out of MedBay, and snuck to school. Little did he know, it was the day of his quarterly test.
And it was one-on-one. Alphabetically. During the last period.

Ned and MJ went before Peter, and he was in the last three. He didn't sleep at all, was high on painkillers, and had a huge headache.

"Mr Parker. It is your turn." Mrs Vandewolf called out, slapping her ruler on the side of Peter's desk.

She led him to the front of the room, and started the quiz.

"How do you say; 'Hello, how are you today?' Mr Parker?"

"Привет, как ты сегодня?" Peter supplied duly, barely concentrating.

Looking slightly surprised, the teacher continued.

"I attend Midtown High, in Queens, New York."

"Я учусь в Средней школе в Квинсе, штат Нью-Йорк."

"Well done. There is one last part. You will need to fill in your family's names in the appropriate places. In my family there is:"

"В моей семье есть тетя Нат, Тони, дядя Стив, дядя Баки, дядя Клинт и Пеппер."
Peter said, not catching his mistake.

"Can- can you please repeat that, Mr Parker?"

"В моей семье есть тетя Нат, Тони, дядя Стив, дядя Баки, дядя Клинт и Пеппер."

"Do you mean the Avengers?" Mrs Vandewolf said, looking shocked.

"Yu-huh."

"And who taught you Russian?"

"Aunty Nat and Bucky."

"You are a liar." Mrs Vandewolf supplied, slapping her ruler next to Peter's hand.

"Mmmmnot." Peter mumbled, half asleep.

"If the Avengers are your family, then one of them must be your emergency contact."

"Yea, it's... wait what" Peter groaned, sitting up.

"You have just falsely claimed that the Avengers are your family." She stated, lowering her voice.

"What, no."

"Who is your EC then?"

Peter tried to stutter something out, but stopped when Mrs Vandewolf pulled his file.

"Emergency Contact. Miss Natalia Smith."

The bell rang, relieving Peter of his interrogation.

He rushed out, still woozy from the massive amount of painkillers he was on. So woozy, he didn't see Tony Stark in front of him. He felt him when Peter ran into him though.

"Oh, you are so grounded, Peter." Tony grumbled.

Mrs Vandewolf chose that specifically unfortunate time to emerge from her classroom.

"Mr Parker, a word if you will." She called, only noticing who he was walking with when they were right in front of her.  "Mr Parker, we need- TONY STARK?"

"In the flesh." Tony sassed with a straight face, although Peter could tell he was about to burst out laughing.

"Mr Parker, this is going too far. First you fall asleep in my class, then you reveal you have a perfect Russian Vocab, and 'live with the Avengers.' Now..." Mrs Vandewolf trailed off hopelessly at this, gesturing at Tony.

"Well, let me get this straight. He dies live with us, and he's been taught Russian by the best multilingual person I know." Tony said, cutting off Peter, who's feeble attempts to excuse himself had been cut off a few words in. "Now, is that all?"

Mrs Vandewolf simply stared, as Tony and Peter walked out the door.

She gave her notice later that day.

"Now Peter, what do we say about going to school after you've been shot?" Tony quizzed, walking Peter to Happy's car, parked right outside the school.

"Don't." Peter groaned. "But it doesn't hurt! See?" He asked, poking himself in the shoulder, then almost falling over, racked with pain.

Tony caught him, and exasperatedly put him in the car.

Mrs Vandewolf never told a soul that Tony Stark had came to defend one of her student.

Peter learnt to not go to school after a serious injury on patrol, or at least until Tony said he could.

Tony learnt that he had to have a closer eye on Peter.

And Nat thought it was a good idea to teach Peter Mandarin.