A Second Chance

The Note

A week later.

Jessica and the boys were cleaning out Sam's office.

 

"Look at all this stuff! Sam was such a messy person!" Jessica laughs.

"I know! I don't think he ever threw anything away!" Samuel says.

Jessica was sitting on his desk chair, going through his drawers, when she looked on his desk, and saw their wedding picture.

A small smile appeared on her face.

Beside it was a picture of the boys.

"Look at my babies! Boys, this was at the fair, do you remember?"

"I don't." Michael says.

"Well you were only two. How about you guys?"

"Let me see." James takes the frame and sits on the edge of his fathers desk.

"Hah.. Yeah, I remember! That was when Sam threw up on dad!"

"That's right!" Jessica laughs.

"That was a fun day.." She sighs.

Jessica leaned down and opened the last drawer.

She paused and didn't blink.

"What is it, ma?" Sam asks.

"... He saved these?! I cannot believe he saved them!" She smiles.

"Saved what?"

Jessica takes a deep breath and pulls out a box of crinkled up paper.

"What is that?"

She let out a small huff of a chuckle and picked up a handful of notes.

She brought them to her face and inhaled the scent.

"Mom?" Michael says.

"Oh... Um.. Heh!

These are noted that your father and I used to write each other in school. I can't believe he kept them all."

"What do they say?"

"Let's see."

Jessica picks a random note and opens it up.

She reads it silently to herself and chuckles.

Her eyes were watery, but she had such a happy smile on her face as she thought back to her high school days.

"This one.. This is one from freshman year.. Just after we started dating.

It says,

Jessie, I think you are the most beautiful girl at Eastveiw High School. Let's go to the burger shack after school today, and I'll share my double cheese burger, fries and chocolate milkshake with you.

Haha! Your father always knew the way to my heart was through my stomach!" She laughs.

"This one I wrote to him.

Sammy Wammy! I just wanted to tell you that you are my favorite person in the world and I can't wait till we grow up and get married and have a whole bunch of babies!

Hah! This was dated, November of 98... Little did I know, I was about four weeks pregnant with you two goons!" She looks at the twins.

"That's so crazy! You sound like a kid! You even wrote like one!"

"Well that's because I was one!" She laughs.

Jessica grabbed both handfuls of the notes and just stared at them.

"This went on all throughout high school."

"Even after you had us?" James asks.

"Oh yeah! The notes were a little different after that, like, Did you forget to pump at lunch today, cause your boobs look ginormous!

Or, The babies kept me up all night, let's skip the burger shack and go home.

Hah! But your father was very romantic, so he'd add in some cute and sweet little notes.

... Man, it feels like a lifetime ago."

Jessica puts them back in the box and moves it to the side.

There was one note left on the desk, so she picked it up to put it with the others.

Before she set it down, something told her to read it.

Jessie.

My beautiful baby girl.
You're reading this, so that must mean that I'm gone.

I wish I didn't have to leave you, but that's out of our control.
I want you to know that I am always with you.

I said that over and over again when we first found out about this horrible disease, and I'm sure I said it to the end, but I mean it.

Know that as you're reading this in my old chair; I am with you.

Ever since the first day I laid my eyes on you, I knew that I'd make you my wife.

So many things have hit us, but it has made us so strong, and so much closer.

We are inseparable, baby. And death CANNOT break that!

I will forever be yours and you mine.

I know that we planned on having another baby, and.. Well, it would've been really great to start over with you.

I pray to God that, that one time we tried, you got pregnant. Because that is what is going to help you the most.

You need that.

You need that little baby that you and I created together, to help you through my death.

More than likely, you're probably not, but if you are.. Hah! Well you're welcome!

It'd be pretty cool to end my life that way.

Go out with a bang!

Knock my wife up before I start kickin it with Jesus!

I hope you're laughing at all my stupid jokes, like you always did.

You know, I love making you laugh.

It's the most beautiful sound in the world.

... I love you, Jessie.

Always remember how much I love you.

I want you to be happy, so find someone. Please!

It doesn't have to be right now, but I want you to be with someone that is going to tell you just how gorgeous you are and how absolutely amazing you are.

I'll still tell you everyday.

Every time you look in the mirror and point out your flaws, know that I'm right there like always, telling you how crazy you are, because you're the prettiest and sexiest woman on this planet!

Also, sorry for the mess! I've never been very neat.

I saved every note we ever sent each other. I'm just weird like that, but I love it! Some could get kinda dirty, so watch it before you let the kids read them!

Anyway, I guess that's it.

Oh but one more thing!

If you happen to be pregnant, and it's a boy!

You better name him Grayson! Haha, I love you, baby girl.

God gave me you for the ups and downs
God gave me you for the days of doubt
For when I think I've lost my way
There are no words here left to say, it's true
God gave me you, gave me you.

- Forever your Sammy Wammy. <3