Gotta Keep on Running

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September 23, 2005

It's been a couple of days since the first show, and I can't stop thinking about what Harry told me.

I was concerned with the fact the Dougie liked me, because I had a boyfriend, but I was also concerned about what Harry had said about Dougie.

You won't know if he's breaking.

Dougie didn't really seem like the type to break.

This was something that I really needed time to think about, but I didn't really have anytime to think about it. This tour was more hectic than the last, and the boys were extra hyper. They were weird and did weird, boy things, like riding a little girl scooter around the backstage area.

They also drank beers before every show and ran around like mad men.

I would always try and hide out in the bathroom, just for a bit of peace, just so I could properly think about what was going on, but whenever I tried to slip away Fletch would always need me for something, or Danny would do something like bang into a wall, so I had to stay.

I decided today I had to call Liam. In a couple of days I would be going on tour full time with the boys and I needed to see him before I left.

I asked Fletch if I could make a phone call when we reached the venue and he said of course, so I made my way into a private toilet to call him.

"Hello?" He answered on the phone and I felt myself smile.

"Liam!" I exclaimed.

"Oh... Hey Lilly." He said. "Why are you calling? Aren't you busy taming the monkeys?"

"Liam, don't call them that." I laugh. "I got a minute away so I wanted to call you. I really want to go out with you before I leave for tour. I know you've been busy lately and I get it, but I miss you."

"Well...yeah. I think we probably could get together before you leave." He says.

"Maybe we could go out to dinner?" I ask, feeling myself smiling, but I still felt a little sad.

"Yeah. Next Tuesday?" He asked. That was three days before the boys and I would pack up and continue the tour on the bus.

"Perfect." I say. "And maybe I could meet you at your apartment? I'm dying to see it."

"Sounds good. But I won't be out of work until six, so don't come over until at least six thirty. I wouldn't want you standing outside waiting for me." He says. I know Liam can be headstrong and forward, but he was so caring, and that's what I loved about him. That's why he was right for me. I had to keep telling myself that.

"Well how's work be-" I begin.

"I'd love to talk babe, but I have to go." Liam said.

"Why?" I ask.

"School stuff." He said. I get it. being a student and a security guard can't be easy, I imagine.

"Alright. Well maybe I could get you tickets to one of the shows sometime? One that's nearby. The shows are great and I'm sure the boys would give me really good tickets. Plus, I could even come into the audience and stand with you!" I say.

"Don't plan on it." He laughs over the line. "I really have to go Lilly."

"Right. Sorry. Love you." I say.

"Love you too." He says before hanging up.

I closed my phone quickly and looked at myself in the mirror. I was smiling, but I had a lump in my throat.

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