Underneath Your Skin

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June 17, 2005

Last week I made my way to the band house only to find it to be covered in rubbish again. So I cleaned it.

I didn't mind cleaning the band house every once in a while, but it was annoying that I cleaned it so often.

And I know it wasn't my job to clean it, but their house was genuinely in unlivable condition. I was afraid if I left, one of them would get lost, or worse, Zukie would get lost.

Today the boys didn't have any interviews or rehearsals, which even I was happy about, because I swear, if I had a dime every time one of the boys said, 'we can't tell you yet' to an interviewer I would be richer than them.

And they're rich.

Liam was apartment shopping today. I was happy he was finding his own place, because I love him, but I didn't want him to move in. This was my first relationship, anyway.

The boys said they wanted to go out for lunch today, and they graciously invited me, to which, of course, I complied. I love spending time with the boys outside of work.

I made my way up their steps and rang the doorbell. I didn't hear an answer, but I heard some music blaring from inside so I opened the unlocked door.

As soon as I stepped inside the lyrics of Don't Stop Me Now by Queen were blaring so loud I could've gone deaf. Suddenly, Dougie and Tom Zoomed passed me on skateboards and into the living room. I made my way into the living room to find the couch, turned over with empty pizza boxes on top.

Danny and Harry then popped up from behind the couch, screaming a war cry, and fired paintballs passed me. I instantly ducked and covered my head.

I found my way to the speakers and unplugged it quickly.

"Hey." Harry said.

"That's enough!" I cry as Dougie and a Tom zoom in on their skateboards. "Boys, I clean your house every week, and I get it, you're not going to make your bed everyday or always do your dishes, but you can't keep dirtying the place until the point that it's unsuitable for humans to live in!"

"We didn't ask you to clean it Lilly. We're fine living like this." Harry said.

"I know you didn't ask me, Harry, but it's not safe for you to be living here." I say.

"What are you saying?" Danny asks.

"I'm saying that you need to pay for a professional cleaning person to clean the bare necessities." I say.

"A maid?" Harry asks.

"Cleaning person." I correct.

"Fine by me." Tom says. "But we're not hiring her."

**************************************************************

I told Fletch about the situation and he gave me the numbers of some cleaners who have worked with celebrities before. Today I had an appointment with a woman named Kathleen Argodd.

Kathleen came over to mine. I figured the band house was in no condition to have an interview in after last week's incident.

Kathleen was a woman who was probably in her fifties with light brown hair that was tied up in bun. She was a bit taller than me and had dark brown eyes. She looks like a classic mum.

I made us some tea and sat down on the couch across from her.

"So I suppose you've heard of the boys?" I say.

"Yes. My grandchildren love them." She beams.

"The boys are...very kind, but they're teenage boys. They are messy and-"

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