(4) Out of Control: An All Time Low FanFiction Romance

Chapter 58: Curveballs

        "Most of these are really good," Matt mused, eyes focused on the song book, flipping through more pages. "There are definitely a lot of good songs to go with. Are there any specific ones you really want to get out on the album?" he asked, his eyes looking up to meet mine. I bit my lip, twisting back and forth slightly in my chair.

        "I don't know. A lot of those songs are just words with whatever beat I putthem to in my head while I was singing them to myself. There are some that I've actually practiced with the guys though." I said, and thought for a moment before listing five or six songs off the top of my head, seeing the guys behind me nodding in recognition of the titles.

        "Okay," Matt nodded. "That's stuff that an be tweaked a lot, so nothing's really ever set in stone. We'll probabl yhave a god number of songs that won't make the final cut."

        "What about that new song?" Maverick chimed in from across the table. My eyes flashed towards his instantly, trying to hide the panicked expression on my face as he continued. "The one you were just working on in the hotel."

        I could have killed him for bringing that up, especially with Jack sitting behind me, about one foot away. I would have glared at him from across the table, but with everybody's eyes on me, it probably would have raised some kinds of questions.

        "That's nothing," I muttered quickly, hoping to just brush it off. "I was just messing around, it's not even good."

        "Is it in here?" Matt asked, holding the book in my direction, eyes raised slightly.

        "No," I answered, shifting in my chair.

        "Well, let's hear it then," Matt said, leaning forward in his chair, my song book in front of him. He collapsed his hands together, watching me patiently. "I'd like to hear you sing for myself."

        "It's not even finished, I only have the first verse and a chorus, and I don't really have a tune," I said, still trying to dodge this bullet, but Matt, or any of the other people int he room, weren't hearing it. They all wanted to hear it, urging me on all at once, filing the room with everyone's voices. Lauren and Jack were the only ones I didn't hear. Lauren was watching me closely, as if she knew why I didn't want to sing the song, and Jack was probably too pissed at me to care.

        "It's okay, just make something up. We can work on it," Matt pressed.

        "Fine, okay," I muttered, running a hand through my hair. My stomach was clenching with nerves that I usually never got, something I could once again attribute to the lanky, dark-haired boy sitting next to me. I tilted my head to the side, running a shaking hand over my face, making up a melody in my head, before I started the song, trying to block out the knowledge of who was in the room staring down at the edge of the wooden table.

        When I finished, I looked up to meet Matt's gaze, relaxing slightly at the look of approval he had. "It's a good start," he commented. "We can definitely work on it while you're in the studio." I breahted in deeply, shooting him a slightly forced smile as he slid my book back across the table, glancing around at us as he picked up a new topic, addressing everyone and not just me.

        After talking about a few more things, we were done with the meeting, agreeing to be in the studio mid-morning to start piecing together the songs we wanted, and apparently finishing the one I'd started, before we began with the actual recording process.

        When Matt said it looked like we were done for the day, I held back a sigh of relief, trying not to seem too eager to get out of the chair. I grabbed my book in one hand as I stood, unable to stop my gaze from traveling to Jack, seeing automatically that his eyes were on me from where he sat. One quick look was enough to know that he knew the song was about him, and my inability to make up my mind or deal with the fact that I could have feelings for someone.        

        I looked away after only a second or two, fingers tightening around my book as I walked towards the door, Lauren and Zack ahead of me, followed by Maverick, Porter and Xavier.

        Out in the hallway, Maverick fell into step beside me, a bad idea on his part.

        "Thanks, Asshole," I grumbled, punching him as hard as I could while walking.

        "Whoa, what the hell did I do?" he questioned, flinching away after I hit him.

        "Nat didn't want anybody to hear that song," Porter chimed in. "And do you want to know why?" he questioned, his words coming out song-like, sounding much too happy.

        "Shut up, Porter," I growled, but he continued awlays. He clearly had a fucking death wish.

        "Because it's about Jack, and she likes him," he said, and I could practically hear the stupid grin on his face as he dragged out the words, Maverick's eyes flying back to my face.

        "Aw, little Natalia likes someone," Maverick said, his tone one you would use if you were speaking to a baby or a really small child. I turned to him, glaring. He tried to back up as I raised my fist, but he didn't have much space to run in the small hallway with Maverick and Porter behind us, so he ended up hitting the wall as I hit him again, my fist connecting with his shoulder angirly.

        Behind us, a few yards away, the members of All Time Low and Matt Squire were exiting the room. I continued to glare at Maverick, pointing a finger at him.

        "If you want to live to see this album finished, I suggest you keep your fucking mouth shut," I said, voice low as I raised my eyebrows at him. He still looked like he was holding back a smrik as I backed away, turning away from him when he muttered something else under his breath, something about me and Jack. I turned to him again, but felt Xavier's hands on my shoulders, pushing me forward.

        "You're lucky, Sage," I warned him, seeing him roll his eyes at me as Xavier chuckled behind me, draping a friendly arm around my shoulder to keep me from hitting Maverick again.

        "Maybe it was better when you stuck to not having feelings for guys," Xavier sighed. "I feel like this opened a shit load of doors for those two morons. You'll never hear the end of this."

        "You're telling me," I huffed, switching my book to my other hand.

        "So, can I ask you something, then?" Xavier asked as we moved through the building, heading towards the front doors.

        "Might as well," I muttered, glancing over my shoulder. Maverick and Porter were a few steps behind us, everyone still a few yards behind, out of hearing range.

        "If you do like Jack, why exactly have you been ignoring him?" Xavier asked, as if he honestly didn't know the answer. I shook my head, pushing open the large door leading outside, stepping into the warm air.

        "As if you don't know everything already," I said, looking up at him with an eyebrow raised. "I know Kinsley tells you everything."

        "Oh yeah, Kins is just thrilled with the way you're acting about this," Xavier chuckled. "So, how is making yourself not care about him working out for you? Is it as easy as you made it sound?"

        Over my shoulder, the sound of Alex and Jack's voice sounded, reaching my ears barely above the other noises around me. I resisted the urge to look back, glancing at my shoes for a moment as I walked, crossing my arms over my shoulder, hugging my book against my chest as I muttered my answer, "I wish," mostly to myself, desperately wishing that it woul dhave been as easy as I thought, but life had it's annoying way of throwing you curveballs that you just couldn't dodge.