Ordinary - (Dabi x OC)

Long Time No See

Top pic credit: KadeArt

Violet POV:

Feeling my body go rigid and my face frozen, I slowly turned my head towards Endeavor with dread, seeing the Number One staring at me in blank, genuine shock.

Well, the secret's out. Goodbye to my temporary double life. I don't know how Hannah Montana did it for so long.

I said nothing, because I couldn't say anything...simply matching Endeavor's dumb look with one of my own as my brain malfunctioned in paralyzing fear.

It only made things worse, and I don't know why. Maybe it's because he looked like he couldn't believe it. Maybe it's how hints of betrayal already began to set into the deep lines of his face. Maybe it's how he couldn't even yell, from how shocked he was.

I almost wished he had yelled. I wished he'd been furious at me. It would have made things easier for some reason, compared to this dead silence.

Quite honestly, it hurt my heart and made me feel like shit. Not having the mask to hide behind anymore only further affirmed the mistakes I made yesterday. It only reminded me that I gave into my anger and let it consume me. How revenge was more important to me in that moment, than actually living.

Kind of sounds like someone else, huh...

Unresolved emotions become blinders to the brain. Trauma becomes your eyes. If yesterday taught me anything, it taught me how easy it is to truly become lost to your own demons and never find your way back.

Especially, if you don't ever have a moment like this to snap you out of it. That moment where reality smacks you in the face. That moment where the things you care about make you remember who you used to be, freeing you from being under the influence of your own uncontrolled emotions.

I get it, Dabi. I really do. I wonder if you'll ever have a moment like that in your life.

You became lost, Dabi. You didn't need any jewels to amplify your emotions, because they were already weighing so heavy on your sleeve. You haven't had a moment like this. One that jolts you back to reality and gives you a wake up call. One that forces you to finally look yourself in the mirror and realize what you've become. Realize how lost you are and how desperately you need someone to help you come back.

But, I had one just now when Endeavor looked at me. Guilt. Regret. Apology. Reality. Even if I hadn't been lost as long as Dabi-even if I may become lost again....at least I had this moment to know what it feels like to find your way back.

I hope you find this feeling too, Dabi. I really do.

For now though, this is how I felt as I looked at Endeavor...feeling an unexpected wave of tears quickly choke up in my throat when his hardened eyes had gradually began to turn somber.

What have I done? Oh god, what have I done.

"I-I can explain this." I said raspily a few tense moments later, breaking the silence and not knowing where to go with it.

Endeavor looked at me for a few more moments with focus, as if it affirm himself that it's really me, before grunting lowly and shoving me away from him harshly.

"You can't explain a damn thing. You've never been able to-or, was that a lie, too?" He asked rhetorically, no longer attempting to fight as his smoking skin defeatedly extinguished itself.

I felt horrible as he looked away from me begrudgingly, seeming as if he'd rather rot in here forever than talk to me ever again.

And, while I normally would have scurried into the corner and never come back to face anyone ever again, I guess I'm not the same person I was a few months ago, as I kept my feet planted in front of Endeavor....forcing myself to confront the problems I caused.