Walking through the snow back to their dorms, the pair of Satou Maya and Ayanokouji Kiyotaka were hand in hand. A beautiful smile graced Satous face as she glanced at him from time to time. The boy who had the notion to reject her earlier, clutched her hand and let her lead him through the snow.
She felt like she could finally move on, her past which shaped her was now handed onto the hands of another; this time she would make sure nothing would mess up her harmony. This notion in her heart and the feeling of infatuation clouded her judgment, she was hand in hand with a boy who has the entire world confused about him. She didn't care one bit about not trying, she was desperate enough before and now she had him.
They kept on walking through the snow and eventually arrived at the dorms building, it was here that Satou paused and stood right in front of him.
"Um... let's end the date here Kiyotaka." She spoke up with a smile. "I-I had fun." She added with a small blush.
"Alright, I had fun too Maya, let's go on another some other day." Ayanokouji replied before looking down at his held hand.
"I guess... this is goodbye for now, good luck..." She let go of his hand and began walking away.
"Bye bye." Ayanokouji waved as he watched her fleeting figure.
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I watched the tombstone of her grave. Surveying the inscriptions over and over again, the name of my wife written out and the only thing I could hear was the pitter patter of the rain.
I came here every week, I had her favourite flowers in my hand. I had her gift wrapped around my wrist. Despite the time we spent together I couldn't help but feel like that time wasn't enough.
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"Wake up Kiyotaka..." I whispered into his ear before snuggling up against his chest.
I had my arms wrapped around his torso, this oozing comfort and scent was going to put me right back to sleep; but I kept my eyes open and seeing his sleeping face made refrain from even trying to rest my eyes.
He turned to face me, even though he was asleep his body always searched for me like a child. I felt happy knowing that I was wanted.
"Wake up..." I cooed softly as I nestled my head on the inside of his shoulder.
It quickly became silent and I heard his breathing slow down a bit, before he moved and wrapped his arms around me.
"Good morning Maya..." He spoke softly to me, he squeezed me softly and cradled me in his arms like he usually does.
"Hehe..." I giggled before looking up into his golden brown eyes. "Good morning." I greeted him back with a beaming smile.
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I watched the two hand in hand, it felt sickening and I was almost at the verge of tears when I saw them walking together. I knew that despite me being unable to hear the conversation, I knew what their body language suggested. The gifts they had wrapped around their wrists and the way she smiled towards him.
"Why not me?" I wondered as I clenched my fists.
He had helped me before, he had done so much for me that I couldn't see it as nothing other than 'that'. I couldn't understand why he always helped me, this fleeting sense of rationality was leaving my body. He obviously loved me, which made this whole situation much more unbearable to see.
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"Ya-hallo! Ayanokouji kun!" I heard footsteps approach me, there was no mistaking her voice; she rushed up to me and slapped me on the back.
"Oh, hello Ichinose." I greeted her before she walked to my side.
"Aww... I was expecting more of a reaction from you..." She said in a low tone whilst eyeing me up and down.
"I was impressed Ichinose." I blurted out which caused her to stop. "Well, I'm more impressed with how you handled Sakayanagi." I continued as I faced her.
"I- um... well, I couldn't have done it without you to be honest and that is why I was so happy to see you." She responded, albeit with a very shy tone and demeanour.
"Oh? Well, I guess I wanted to see you too." I told her in retrospect, I had her completely facing me and I wasn't going to let this opportunity go to waste.
"I-I see..." She mumbled silently before shaking her head frivolously, adopting s cheery smile as she started rummaging through her bag. "Where is it..." She muttered in an almost inaudible tone.
I stood there watching for a few moments, she spared some glances with a wry smile here and there before she seemed to have grabbed onto something. Seeing her recompose herself and straighten up, I put my hands in my pockets and zipped my lips; ready for her to speak.
"Um.. this is the first time I've ever done this..." She began with a downcast look, before she bowed and stretched out her hands with a rectangular box fitted neatly on her palm. "P-Please go out with me!" She exclaimed with a flustered tone.
I was slightly taken aback, this girl in the eye of the public had just confessed to me. In fact, this caused the whole world around us to stop momentarily. The people who were walking to their respective classes stopped and looked at the both of us, shock being the only emotion apparent on their faces.
"Ichinose..." I called out to her. "Can you raise your head?" I asked and hearing me she straightened herself up, but she averted her gaze away from me.
"I knew it..." She muttered. "Um... what's your answer Ayanokouji kun?" She replied with a question.
I stood still, I cast some glances around me and saw a few of the students recording us. A student that was most noticeable being her, she was eyeing me vehemently as if I was prey.
"What can I say?" I began with that, before crossing my arms across my chest. "This is too sudden, and everyone here is looking at us." I continued, still not giving her a concrete answer.
She was motionless for a bit, it seemed like she had her thoughts ready to slip out of her tongue; but something was stopping her from saying it. In my case, I kept on trying to ignore the jealous and confused stares of the people in my surroundings.
"I... uh... um, well, hehe..." She chuckled nervously before extending her hand out once again. "I wanted to give you this Ayanokouji kun, even if you reject me now-."
"Who said I was rejecting you?" I cut her off, her hand shook in mid air before she looked at me hopefully. "Did you hear anything about me rejecting you?" I added before extending my own hand and clutching onto hers which held the gift.
"I-um..." She stuttered and her eyes darted from side to side.
"I accept your confession." I told her softly before taking the gift from her hand. "Take care of me okay?" I continued before putting the gift in my pocket and then moving my hands to her shoulders.
"I-Okay! Thank you! Thank you!" She shouted out gleefully before she rushed into me and wrapped her arms around my back. "I'll gladly take care of you." She told me in a very endearing tone, it even made me feel lighter.
She maintained this embrace, after sometime where I realised that she was the only one hugging; I reciprocated her advance and held her in my arms. I didn't know what to feel, I was happy about this no doubt; she was smiling and I too couldn't help but crack one myself.
I had my body focused on her, but my eyes wandered and it landed on her again. She had a sullen face, it was so sad that it nearly sullied the romantic mood; this wasn't helped by the bystanders but I didn't care about them. However, she met my gaze with a feeling of longing and I felt in my heart that something was missing.
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I watched him walk into the room and take a seat beside me, my neighbour Ayanokouji Kiyotaka was starting to make more and more of an impression on me. It was something that I had no idea where it's origins came from, I just started becoming more aware of him.
"Good morning." I turned to my side to greet him.
"Good morning Horikita." He replied with his usual expression.
He gave me that short response and turned towards the window, it has become something so casual and routine like; the earlier days when we had back and forth's were practically gone now.
It was nearly Christmas and I didn't know what I was going to do, I had originally thought about relaxing and enjoying a book with a cup of tea. However, I feel like I wanted to do something different that day. I turned towards Ayanokouji kun again, he still looked out the window and that expression never changed.
"So why can't I say anything?" I wondered, my words were caught in my throat and I couldn't help but gawk at him.
"Horikita?" I straightened myself up and cleared my throat when he called out to me.
"Can I ask you something?" I spoke up quickly after him.
"Go ahead?" He replied in a question manner.
"Are you free on Christmas Day?" I posed that question with a straight face.
"No." He replied curtly. "I have a date with Satou on that day, sorry." He apologised before resting his chin on his hand.
"A date? A date?!" I looked at him incredulously, attempting not to slam my hand down and shout at him.
I managed to stifle the rage, but in turn it led to an awkward silence where he looked at me up and down. I turned away from him, I was upset by this; the one time were I wanted to spend Christmas with someone else and that person was already unavailable.
*Ring* *Ring* *Ring*
The bell rang and Sensei stood at the podium.
"Hahh..." I sighed exasperatedly, it was only the start of the day and I was already unhinged.
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Where to start. There was a very difficult task, it was very hard to discern where it should start. How it should or when it should start.
It was Christmas Day and a new couple was born, the couple of Satou Maya and Ayanokouji Kiyotaka had since then been dating for a month and a half. It was a blissful time for the two of them and what Ayanokouji with his partner had gambled on worked out for the best.
She was happy, he was happy and nothing could ever make them separate. It was a simple thing to say that life despite its cons and negatives has the positives to keep you going. She found her heart nestled in his hand and she found his nestled in hers. She felt like the whole universe had finally given her what she wanted.
A loving partner in a school that allowed for anything. Unfortunately, that meant the worst could also happen.
"Hey!" She shouted out as she rushed towards the boy.
"I'm done talking, leave me alone, I won't leave Maya." He responded with a strict tone that baffled the girl.
"And I am telling you to wait and listen to me! Why are you so into the girl anyways?!" She rebuked, her tone raised as she marched onwards towards the boy.
"Why would you care!" He turned to face her, she saw his face and that glare which scared her before showed up again.
She stayed silent, unable to utter her next sentence as the breeze from the sea brushed through the pair. She had an almost teary eyed look, her hands were trembling by her side and she tried to remain composed.
"Tell me, why do you care?" Ayanokouji spoke up again, repeating his words in a more serious manner.
The silence still remained, no words were exchanged and she was losing herself to his presence.
"Goddammit... GODDAMMIT!" She mentally squealed.
She looked at him and peered into his eyes, determination which was once missing flowed through her and she stood firm.
"I... um." She stammered a bit but then her once loose composure changed to a steady one and she started walking up to him.
He backed away from her, it was currently nighttime and the only thing that illuminated their surroundings was a streetlight. In this place they were near the sea, a fence being the only thing separating him from falling in.
His back hit this fence, he knew the danger but she didn't relent and pushed him to the breaking point. She stood in front of him determined with her hair fluttering in the wind. She had her hands reached out towards him but instead of grabbing him, she ended up grabbing the rails.
The rails that shook and creaked, the look of horror on her face as she watched him slip. She reached out to grab him but he had fallen too quickly. The last thing she saw were his golden eyes illuminated and faced towards her, his body was falling and travelling faster.
*Crck.*
The noise was sickening, nauseating and when she looked down he saw his body float in the water. His closed eyes looking up whilst small strands of red blood began dirtying the once clean sea.
"Hahh... Hahh... Hahh.." Her chest heaved up and down.
She couldn't believe the sight. The boy she had cornered had broken the fence and tumbled down precariously into the water. His head smashed against the rock on the way down, whether he was dead or alive was a mystery.
She looked at the body and in a blur began calling for help, calling an ambulance before she sat down. Unable to register the reality of what had happened, she sat there blank faced until the medics and staff arrived to help him. Meanwhile, the girl watched him being carried away.
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"What happened?!" I screamed at the doctor, he only looked at me emptily.
"I apologise Mrs Satou." He began and then opened the door to which I walked in.
"No..." I gazed upon the figure of my boyfriend, he was laying there bandaged and unconscious.
"What happened?" I asked him again in a low tone, I was on the verge of tears as I approached him.
"We don't know the specifics yet, but there was a witness and from her words he had fallen into the sea." He replied as he he walked to the other side of Kiyotaka.
"Will he be alright?" I asked in a worried tone before bringing his hand out to my cheek.
"From this head injury we may need to have some tests run first. I wouldn't want to say the worst case scenario, let's hope for the best as of right now." He answered. "He is stable right now, it will only be a matter of time until he wakes up again. You are free to stay with him here tonight." He continued before walking away towards the door.
"Thank you. For all your help." I gave him my gratitude as I gripped Kiyotakas hand tighter.
"No problem." He replied before exiting the room.
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Several hours passed, nobody else came into the room and Satou was all alone crying as she waited for her boyfriend to wake up.
She pleaded and despite knowing that he would wake up, the wait was unbearable to her; the uncertainty in her heart was affecting her deeply. There was only hope, the only thing she wanted was for her boyfriend to say a word to her.
She held his hand, never letting go even when tears streamed down her face and stained the sheets of the bed he laid in. There was no sound other than his breathing, no words other than the sobbing of the girl.
"Wake-."
His fingers twitched, her plea interrupted momentarily as she looked at the boys face. She saw the movement, his hand was moving slowly but the twitching meant that he was coming out of the coma.
"Wake up..." She mumbled silently, hoping that he would open his eyes.
Her prayers were answered almost immediately, his eyes fluttered open only looking up at the ceiling. Despite her urges to embrace him, she sat still and let him get used to his surroundings once again.
She increased the grip on his hand, which caught the boys attention who turned to his side; his eyes focused on the girl who was smiling happily. Seeing her smile so happily at him, he too smiled at her. The first smile that Satou had seen from the boy, her heart was elated. Happiness flowed through her body and spirit.
"Hello Kiyotaka..." She greeted him with a soft whisper.
She brought his hand up and rested her cheek on it as she watched him. He held her hand and sat up.
"Hello." He replied before glancing at the door. "We're in a hospital room right?" He asked and the girl nodded in confirmation.
Seeing that the boy relaxed himself and looked up at the ceiling.
"Are you alright?" She asked him with a concerned tone.
"I'll be fine I guess, but where is she?" He answered before posing a vague question.
"Huh? Who is she?" Satou asked curiously.
"My girlfriend, Ichinose Honami." He answered.
The whole world shattered for Satou Maya, for once she got a good look into his eyes. Those eyes which once showed admiration and possible adoration for her were replaced, that usual coldness had returned.
"B-But..." She was shook, her words were carried with so much loss.
"Where is she? The girl that I love..." He continued before adopting a smile.
"No..." It was at these words that she realised what his smile meant. He wasn't happy to see her, he was happy to be alive and being able to see Ichinose once again.
"I- um..." She stuttered once again, tears threatening to leave her eyes.
She had no idea why he said those words, but she knew what to do to leave this room. She stood up and let go of his hand before going to the door.
"Ahem..." She cleared her throat and looked at the boy who returned the look with a head tilt. "Im going to call a doctor to say that you are awake." She told him to which he nodded in understanding.
She proceeded to call for the doctor, the doctor knew of the couples status and upon seeing the girls state he rushed into the room. It was a quick process and it ended in less than ten minutes.
"He has an impaired memory and dementia. I would also diagnose him with amnesia, this seems to be pretty mild but, seeing your state I assume he doesn't remember you." He paused, the pair were outside discussing Ayanokouji diagnosis. "He kept on repeating the name of an Ichinose Honami." He continued albeit, his voice cracked due to the immense pity he felt for the girl standing opposite him.
"I... what am I supposed to do?" She asked, but she felt that there was only one thing to do.
"I think you want to stay with him right?" He replied as he posed a question.
She nodded and then glanced at the door, but in her heart she was distraught at seeing him like that. However, she spoke up and still tried to find a way.
"I do, but I don't think that pushing myself onto him will help, s-should I stay away?" Her eyes were downcast and a tear rolled down her cheek.
"It's my advice, but follow what you feel is right. I think you should stay away for a while or at least try and befriend him, amnesia is hard to deal with and if you two were a couple..." He paused like before and crossed his arms. "If you were a couple, I think jumping the gun when he thinks this Ichinose person is his girlfriend will cause a split. Take your time, if he truly loves you and I am sure he does, then he will remember you." He finished his speech with a gentle smile.
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I was bawling my eyes out, the pictures we had together were torn apart. I couldn't believe him as he turned towards me, the boy I loved was replaced by this stranger.
"Why me?" I pondered, I had cried enough already but life always has a way to make me cry even harder.
I sat there with tears lining my face, my make up was smeared and I could only look at the ground to try and ignore the disaster I had become.
He hugged her, she confessed to him and I stood there like an idiot watching them. He got his wish, his precious Ichinose was in his arms and now they were dating.
"So you forgot about me?" I clenched my fists and dug my nails deeply into my palms. "What about us? My dreams with you?" My lips quivered, I was losing my strength to stay awake. "Did you ever love me?" I want to ask Kiyotaka this question specifically.
He did love me, at least that's what I think. Now I am watching them, I was unsure about this; I don't know whether to chase him anymore. I am truly lost now with more sadness than joy in my life.
We broke up that night, he didn't reveal his love to her at all in that night; he spent time with her. The doctor told him his health problems and his amnesia, but my request was to spare him the details about me.
He got so much done in two months, but it's to be expected; I fell in love with him in a day. He didn't try then, but he tried with her; the same amount of effort he put into our relationship and deepened my love for him. He made her fall as deeply in love with him as he did to me.
It was nighttime and all I could think about was the couple that just formed, yet the couple that we were was gone now and he had Ichinose.
I made my way to the bed and laid on it before pulling the blanket over me. I rested my eyes, letting myself drift off to sleep. I began dreaming about him a lot, I always remembered about us. How that month and a half was everything to me, now he has gone and loved someone else.
I only wished for him to come back to me.
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A/N
Hehe, hehe, hehe. I have plans for this one, and others but I am super busy with school lol. I hope you enjoyed this. Have a blessed day.
Thanks for reading
3859 words