Craig twisted the piece of leaf that was between his fingers , watching the now all grown up girl that he had met 12 years ago rolling down the hill at great speed .
"Looking fabulous (Y/n) ! Keep on rolling ."
He shouted as he sipped some saké , watching with amusement as he watched her screaming at the top of her lungs , yelling directly at him for help .
"Help me you shitty bastard ! I didn't come all the way here to roll down this god damn hill ! "
He rolled his eyes at her rude comment , ignoring any further words from her as he turned his head to face another direction . He took a look for a few seconds before focusing his attention on his nails .
"Oh yeah . Doesn't Kyle owe me something ? What was it again..."
Craig ponded while he started scratching the wooden platform that he was lying on . He soon gave up on it though , thinking that it's too much of a bother and a waste of his precious brain cells that he was constantly losing everyday from thinking about pointless things like the fact that the friend , who was the original shrine god, had just up and left and leaving Craig with all the responsibility of a proper shrine god .
He had never gotten over the memory when he received a letter from said original shrine god , the letter detailing about the fact that he had found his 'One true love' while traveling and planned to relinquish his title to become a mortal and live the rest of his life with his current wife . Which was how Craig , who had never planned to become a shrine god in the first place , easily acquired the job .
However , there was one thought that he had never thought to be a waste of his time and brain cells .
And that thought was the idea of his beloved girl being his future bride .
Sure he could've just manipulate the town folks to 'sacrifice' her to him as , what he liked to call, an 'offering' . However , he knew that wasn't really the most romantic way he could've married her and besides , (Y/n) would've definitely complain that he lacked the 'romance' bone in him .
So he had to go the long route which was waiting until she reached adulthood and capturing her heart in the process .
All of the other shrine gods had a good laugh when they heard of his plan , it was ridiculous that a shrine God was putting so much effort into obtaining a mere human that was sure to die within a blink of an eye .
Well most of them had never tried to fall in love so Craig just ignored their comments and retorted back that they were just envious that they were going to remain single for an eternity while he was going to have someone that loves him back .
Yeah, the shrine gods didn't appreciate that and Craig immediately had a fallout with some of them .
"Well, it's not like I was ever on good terms with any of those bastards anyways . "
He mumbled , picking up a mochi and dropping in into his mouth . He chewed with satisfaction , watching as his bride stumbled into a tree , walking backwards in pain as she cursed at the nothingness and falling backwards into the pond of koi fishes , that Craig was keeping as pets , and calling out for help as she flung her hands around .
He stifled a laugh , almost spitting out his saké in the process while his bride got out of the pond completely wet from head to toe .
Did he mention that his bride had terrible luck on her side ?
She sucked in a deep breathe ,her eyes wondering about before landing on Craig . She slowly began walking towards him , a dangerous aura surrounding her entire body while a murderous intent was seen in her eyes .
"Oh Craig ~" She sang , a sharp object in hand as she drew closer towards him .
'Ah I'm fucked aren't I ? ' He thought , the idea of running off into the forest starting to sound tempting . He felt a shiver run up his spine when his bride showed him her deadly smile , which was radiating with her love , devotion and not to mention the need of his blood splattered on the ground and on her hands while she laughed maniacally in victory .
He swallowed the lump in his throat , palms starting to become rather sweaty than he would have liked and his heart starting to beat way faster than usual as he watched her crawl towards him . His eyes darting from her wet clothes that was stuck to her skin to her eyes that was filled with evil intent as she raised the object into the air .
"Craig ~"
"Oh fucking god -"
He immediately got up , running off with slight arousal and fear running through his veins .
The once cute and innocent child that he found wondering in the forest all those years ago was now chasing after him with the only thought of pinning him down and making him beg for her mercy .
Yeah , arousal was definitely the major player in the situation right now , at least for Craig that is .
"Come on honey , I just want to show you my love by giving you a little stab ~"
(Y/n) cooed , her hand reaching out for Craig's clothing to pull him back.
"Ha ha ! No thanks sweetheart , not today ! How about you show your love to me in bed instead ? "
The two of them continued running through the forest , the chirping of birds and the noises from the insect being softened out by their 'love confessions' that would happened almost everyday now .
Yep , nothing out of the ordinary was happening today either .
_____________________________________
Okay so , this was requested by AnimeKitty121- sorry if I spelled it wrong - and I hope you all enjoyed this chapter .
Anywho , I was basically just writing some future stuff about Craig and Reader and what has been throwing at them and all .
So in summary , this was like a drabble of sort ?
Meh , idk man . I'm just a student who's just trying to pass her exams and get all her homework done in one day so I won't get a heart attack the next day with incomplete work .
Anways , hope you all enjoyed this and sorry if there was any mistakes in this !
Adios~
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South Park x reader oneshot
FanfictionRequest are opened Just some oneshots between you and characters of South Park! ~Currently on hold~
