South Park x reader oneshot

[Mermaid Au ] Well , I would fuck me too - Eric Cartman × Male!Mermaid!Reader

Note : Sorry if anything is wrong . 😜

No one's pov .

"How many times do I have to tell you (M/n) ? We are not supposed to go up to the shore ! I'm sure you of all people heard of stories about mermaids who dared to swim up to shore . I mean , your sister was one of them and look how that turned out , she didn't come back . "

"Oh shut it Wendy . Don't tell me you haven't done the same too , I heard from Red that you went up to the shore to meet a certain somebody . A male human somebody to be exact . "

"Oh shush . "

Wendy gave (M/n) a slap on the arm as they swam back to their families . Well , Wendy was the one swimming back to her family , (M/n) had no one . His mom was taken or killed , he didn't remeber , by sailors when he was young while his dad was killed . So his only living family left was his older sister , who , never came back when she told him she was just going up to shore to have a peak .

But that was 4 years ago .

And he never complained about how lonely he felt during those 4 years . It wasn't their fault for leaving him all alone , time just wasn't on their side when it happened . It was rare for a memaid to be kidnapped but it was even rarer for a mermaid to be killed . The elders always told them to avoid going up shore at any cost , and told them stories about the above . It was mostly to scare the young from getting any ideas and it worked , mostly . 

(M/n) never understood why his sister was so I interested with the above. With all the stories they were told and the fact that both their parents death was by the hands of humans, you would think she would avoid swimming to the above. But no, it wasn't off her bucket list. He always wondered though, was his sister still alive and was she doing well? Had she found someone to love and maybe start a family.

Mermaids had the ability to transform their tail to legs ( I don't really know the process )  but it was a painful process. Let's say it was like giving birth and having your arm rip off at the same time. But besides that, mermaids were like humans. They could talk, breathe, reproduce and had all the organs any humans have. But it was extremely rare for mermaids to decide to live the rest of their lives as humans.

But once in a blue moon, there would always be one mermaid who would do that. Sometimes two, sometimes three, but no more then that. (M/n) let out a dry laugh at the thought of that, his sister was already one of the mermaids who was dumb enough to do just that.

He waved a goodbye at Wendy as they parted ways. This time, (M/n) decided to take the long way route back home. While he knew taking this route would expose him to human society since it was so close to ships and boats, he made up his mind to see what was so special about the above that made some of his kind want to swim up to the shore and possibly get taken by sailors.

Luckily for him, night was falling and there wasn't much ships nor boats to be seen underwater. So it was probably safe for him to have a little peak. It wasn't like he was going to get killed or kidnapped.. Right ?

Was what he should've thought before he landed himself in this situation. Turns out, there was a ship up there that had just arrived and was run by God damn pirates of all people. (M/n) crossed his arms and 'tch' as he watched the pirates dance and celebrate , probably because of his capture . He was currently trapped in a rectangular shaped tank filled with sea water . There was one pirate that caught his eye though , it was this fat one that was drinking his life away .

"Fucking fat-ass , kidnapping me and trapping me in this stupid shit . "

(M/n) mumbled as he tried to find a way out . So far , there was only opening and it was the top . But unfortunately , the tank was in the middle of the deck so escaping was a big no , no . While (M/n) was finding another way , a hand suddenly slammed against ome of the tank's glass wall . This startled him as he went to see who it was .