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Hey guys so I have some things to tell you

I wont be updating "Secrets" for awhile

Really there's so much drama in my life right you would thing its a lifetime movie

So just to tell you how I been......where do I start?

Remember that friend that called me a bitch well we made. I know what your think "How could you forgive n blah blah" but what he did and set up was aweome. He rearranged the whole lunch room with forgive best friend banners and purple balloons(I LOVE PURPLE). Then he got a giant bear that is bigger than me that said "Bwest Fweind" (like how babies say it) so yeah

now my twin(not my real twin) b-day is next Monday s I wanted to get the fam and squad together and celebrate a early b-day get together and go skating. So I sent out the invite via kik facebook and the gram......so I invited my bf cause hes friends with twin..........I wish I didn't(now so yall can have the same mindset as me........my bf ended up moving lik 2hrs from me and transferring schools now we see eachother maybe 2wice a month(sad right) so I do all I can to spend time with him whenever I can) so when I asked him he said no so I asked why and he was just lik no I don't like your friends.........(in my mind I was thinking about all the times when are dates we ruined due to his family and friends) so I was like you can survive 2hrs with them so I was like but they wont bother you......idk what ticked him off but he just snapped "WELL I DONT WANT TO BE AROUND A BUNCH OF YOUR FAKE FRIENDS I WANT TO HANG WITH YOU ONLY, I DONT CARE IF THEY TALK TO ME CAUSE THEY ALL JUST FAKE POINT BLANK" (in my mind- all those times I hung with your fake ass family.......remember fair day when it was suppose to be fun and your family got in a fight wit my friend and ruined are day or when we went to the park and your friend almost killed me(he pushed me in a lake and I cant swim -_-) all that I sacrificed for him but he cant sacrifice2hrs for me

I tell all last night I cried my eyes out I drank and maybe even took a lot of pills

I really don't want to live anymore....but im not going out that easy I refuse to

people say once you hit rockbottom you cant get lower, believe me you can

im just so glad I got jesus hes really the only one who loves me right now because I know my parents don't, some friends don't and now my bf

ive cried for 12hrs straight and skipped school today cuz I cant stop crying......as im typing this I am crying

don't feel bad for me just pray things will get better...right?

12 comments plz.......tell wwyd words of advice or something

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