I Could Die For You (Editing In Progress)

109

(Anthony's POV)

I wandered down an alley on some street that looked purple and green rather than it's normal neutral colors. Lilies were blossoming all around me on the pavement and I felt my body cringe with want as I thought of the beautiful flower and the woman who possessed its powers. I slumped against a wall, and scratched the fresh mark on my arm from injecting.

I needed sleep to bring me down from the high, I needed Lilly, but I knew she wouldn't want a boyfriend who is high off his ass all day. I felt an enormous amount of guilt eating away at me, and even the drugs didn't make it go away. How could I have let the women who I loved more than any star in the universe see me doing something so.. not-sober-Anthony? What was she going to think of me now? Sure, she does have a small drinking problem, but it's nothing compared to some of the binges I've been on.

And besides, I know what I'm like on drugs. I stole from loved ones to pawn and make money for drugs, and I was extremely irresponsible. I couldn't have that lifestyle with a beautiful woman in my life, especially one I was devoted to. It's never been easy for me to get off drugs, how was I going to do it now?

After a half an hour of laughing & crying at the dumpster, I got up and managed myself down the street to a motel. I bought myself a room and collapsed on the couch. Three hours later I woke up. I knew what I needed and where to get it.

It took me 15 minutes to buy myself $200.00 dollars worth of dope, which I brought back to the motel and blew. The next few days were like this. I'd switch motels every two days so they wouldn't grow suspicious of me shooting up. Every time I got near the end of my vicious high, I'd drink it away with a bottle of tequila. Usually it was vodka I used, but I couldn't drink it without wanting to bury myself in Lilly. At the beginning of the second week of my binge, I strapped up my arm and stuck the needle in.

I sat there for a minute or two, questioning my motive. I didn't feel hungry for the drug, I felt hungry for Lilly. I wanted her high more than this, I wanted her more than this. My heart began to quiver, and I ripped the needle out and I unstrapped my arm.

(Lilly's POV)

I was picking up broken bottles of vodka I had thrown last night during my explosive breakdown when the doorbell rang. It was the first time all week I wasn't hungover and it felt like I hadn't slept in days. Because I hadn't, I was up drinking this entire week.

I'd eaten very little and I could feel the weakness radiating through me. I set down the garbage back and carefully stepped around the broken glass to get to the front door. I figured it was a package delivery, so I opened it with just my robe on. My breasts and vagina weren't exposed at all, but I still felt like I was naked.

Anthony stared back at me, with a cold look. His skin was greenish and his hair was in huge tangles-you'd think he had dread locks. His bones stuck out slightly and his shirt was dirty and torn. I didn't say a word, but Anthony launched himself on me. He broke down in sobs and clutched me tightly. I still felt weak and the tightness of his embrace made my face green. Vomit rose in my stomach and I pushed Anthony off.

He looked hurt and confused until I threw up all over the floor. I rolled over next to the puddle, just missing a piece of glass. I'm sure he knew I had been drinking excessively, but he was using too.

"You've been drinking." He said, disappointment clear in his voice. I knew it.

I pulled myself up off the floor and wiped my mouth. "You've been sticking a fucking needle in your arm, and you want to point a finger at me?"

He began to cry again, and as soon as I saw him wipe his eyes I started crying too.

"Why are we so fucked up?" I asked sobbing into my knees. Anthony crawled over to me and held me in his arms. He said nothing, but kissed me lightly on my head.

"Let's get away, Lilly. I don't want to be here anymore." His voice cracked at the end.

"Where will we go?"

"Hawaii. A detox retreat. A sex retreat. A you-and-me retreat."