26 May 2015
I'm adventuring the back of my mind.
Everything is a huge blur of my life.
This song though, it sparks hurt and I guess the reason I've been avoiding it is because I don't want to feel it again.
I remember staying at my mums friends house when my parents first started the property settlement.
I slept on a fold out couch in the same room as my mum and my sister.
If I rolled onto my left side, the couch would tip me off.
I was forced to lay on my right side.
You kept messaging me.
My mum's friends internet didn't quite reach so I had to go sit in the corner of the cold room to message you back.
Only the light of my phone and the street lights outside.
I remembered walking to the park with you when my parents yelled at each other in front of you.
You held my hand really tight and said it would be okay.
That night sitting alone in the corner I didn't really want to talk to you.
I was upset and disoriented.
Not sleeping in my own bed or showering in my own shower.
Everything was weird and nothing felt normal.
Not school.
Defiantly not my family.
Even talking to you felt uncomfortable.
You said it would be okay.
But where were you when I was laying alone in the middle of a netball court, with nobody to talk to in the middle of the day.
You were right though.
I would eventually be okay;
just not with you in the way.
~~~
YOU ARE READING
The recollection of my misunderstood thoughts.
PoetryLife's a struggle and it's hard. There's nothing you can do. Just get trough it. I hate my life. There's nothing new. But when the sun is out and the sky is void of clouds you can't help but feel a smile is overdue
