22 Feb 2015
Court tomorrow.
Don't even know what I'm wearing.
Too lazy to even care.
I think everyone thinks about it too much, all the lawyers and big fancy words.
It's easy, walk in there and answer what they ask.
Yet a strain of anticipation washes over me; adrenaline, shaking, tears and fear.
The tears fall without permission and I don't even know they do until they begin to soak through my shirt and blur the brightness of the harsh light above me.
How I wish it was a different like.
I'm scared she will come up the hallway and have a go at me.
I can't do this.
I've gone on too long and I want to stop.
I don't want to "give up"
Please understand every moment is worse than the last.
It's like being trapped in a cage at the bottom of the ocean with the key just out of reach.
I'm slowly but surely running out of air.
Pulling at the bars.
Not being able to breathe and not knowing how to get out.
You can't scream because it only lessens the time you have.
YOU ARE READING
The recollection of my misunderstood thoughts.
PoetryLife's a struggle and it's hard. There's nothing you can do. Just get trough it. I hate my life. There's nothing new. But when the sun is out and the sky is void of clouds you can't help but feel a smile is overdue
