Invisible Crown

Chapter Twenty Five

I was on my way to the airport to pick up Chris, he just called me after he landed. I kept fidgeting and biting my cheek nervously. I still didn't know how to tell Chris about what happened and how he would react when he finds out.

"You okay there Al?" Alex asked me from the driver seat.

I nodded. "Just a bit tired."

"There's some water in the fridge." He said indicating to the mini fridge in a car.

I ignored it and looked out to the window, it was slightly raining outside. Everybody's in a rush to get to their destinations, cars started to speed and people on the road ran faster while some people still walked patiently even though they didn't have umbrellas or raincoats on. As if they don't even care if they get wet or sick, they just....go like nothing stops them from getting where they wanted to be. Sometimes I wish I could be brave like that too, not give a shit about anything else and just do whatever I want, even if the consequence is bad. I'm just a girl who pretend to be strong and think that I am but in reality I'm too scared to even fight for my own happiness.

Soon enough the car came to a stop, Alex opened the door for me to get out and I saw Chris making his way to me.

He handed the suitcase to Alex and hugged me tightly. "Hi babe, I missed you."

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and smiled. "I missed you too, how's the flight?"

"You tell me, it rains every where I landed." He chuckled and kissed my forehead. "Come on, let's go home."

"Okay." We got in the car again and Chris put his arm around my shoulders, bringing me close. It seems like he did miss me, I felt bad because I didn't.

"I'm sorry I didn't call or text you much when I was away. A lot of things were going on and I couldn't find the time." He leaned his face against my head and said.

I looked up at him and kissed his shoulders. "It's okay baby, I understand."

He smiled back at me and closed his eyes to get some sleep. I sighed quietly but in my head, everything was too loud. I felt like my head was about to explode from all these thoughts, I felt sick to my stomach because I know my feelings for him are no longer there anymore, not even an ounce. Our relationship isn't always perfect, that's for sure but I still love it when we're on good terms, when he actually cares about me and be someone I've always wanted him to be. Now I don't feel anything when he does it anymore, like it was empty. I don't know when did this happen but I'm glad it did, then I won't have false hope about us.

After I thanked Alex for bringing Chris's stuff upstairs, I went into the kitchen to see dinner was already set up. I made up my mind that I would tell Chris tonight, after dinner. I wanted to finish this as soon as possible.

"I'm so fucking tired, my head is killing me." He groaned after drinking his water.

"Go change into something more comfortable babe, I'll get you some Aspirin." I patted his chest and he obliged. Bringing a cup of water and a pill for Chris, I walked into our room to see he was changing his shirt. "Here baby."

"Thanks." He muttered and took it. "I'm going to sleep now, don't call me for dinner."

"But I need to talk to you about something Chris." Fuck I don't wanna stall this conversation.

"Tomorrow is fine Al." He flopped down the bed and grumbled. Within seconds I could already hear his snores. I rolled my eyes and walked out.

I went outside and sat next to the pool, hands holding a hot chocolate milk, I blew into it and took a sip. I kept thinking about that night in Mikayla's apartment, I admit I've never thought I could lose myself so bad like that in front of someone. The only person that seen me so vulnerable like that is my sister and I only let it happened once. I was terrified when seeing I could break too easily in front of Mikayla. I know I could trust her but the feeling of their betrayal still nagging in me, makes me just wanna shut everyone out and screw all of them. People always wonder why I have trust issue but never once did they think it's all because of their lying issues. This makes me hate people sometimes, always try to act like they know me when they don't know shit. I was deep in my head that I startled when my phone buzzed off.

It was a text from Mikayla, she sent me a picture of her holding a cupcake with a box full of them next to her.

'Look!! I just found a place selling the best cupcakes ever!! Now you know how to make me feel better.'

I looked at the picture and saw how excited she was holding the cupcake. I wish you don't ever have to go through what I went through. She's too precious to be hurt.

Another text came through.

'It's really good! I wish you were here to try it.'

I breathed out and turned off the phone, holding the cup closer to me so I could feel the warmth. I wish you met someone better than me.