I'm in love with my best friend...
In the chaos of Renmin's crushing marriage their son needs to do everything possible and impossible to never ever let his best friend find out it has been him only - the muse behind every song, the substance of eac...
Xiaojun pulled back from his favorite embrace turning to Jae who had a tired smile while watching them.
"Yangyang take good cafe of him, ok?"
"I will," Yangyang nodded when Jae passed them walking down the long hospital corridor.
"Let's go to your father," whispered Yangyang when Xiaojun shook his head.
"It's my fault that Ti died, I had shouted on her."
"So tomorrow we will find someone who is selling a similar cat and we will buy Renjun a present," Yangyang's eyes became livelier.
"It might be too early for him."
"Too early or not he needs something positive," Yangyang pointed at the divorce papers. "Is Jaemin really leaving him?"
"Looks like that."
"No offense Xiaojun but I never liked him much."
"Me neither," Xiaojun even managed to smile through the tears, what could his favorite person do to him.
"What about your dinner?"
"Have left in the middle," Yangyang became red.
"Why? Sura might be mad."
"I don't care you needed me. Girls can come and go but you are my family," Yangyang suddenly hugged him again changing the horror of the night into glittering stars.
Taeyong was sleeping with his head on the mattress when Renjun opened his eyes to discover he's in a hospital bed. Yet his Daddy Tae was here holding his hand, when the whole world has fallen apart he was here. Not only him, there was a shape of a fragile boy curled up on the couch, his head resting on Yangyang's lap while Yangyang was playing with his hair. Renjun even chuckled in a faint way. Xiaojun never liked people or touching, even as a child wouldn't accept a hug from him or Jaemin. Never allowed anyone closer until Yangyang came. Renjun just wished at least these two will work out, as it was obvious there was no one else Xiaojun would ever accept. Were Yangyang's feelings only friendship like, he seemed so affectionate while playing with Xiaojun's hair, their eyes suddenly met, Ynagyang made a move as if he wanted to get up but Renjun just put his finger to his lips giving him a sign to stay calm, Taeyong and Xiaojun definitely needed a rest after this scary day. Why wasn't Jaemin here thought Renjun an insane pain waking up. Has no one told him or was he really so heartless to not to care. Or has he stopped to love?
Jae came in the early morning to stay with Renjun when Taeyong took them to the castle. MeiNei was there, she seemed cried out and sad.
"Is it true?" she asked. "Will they really divorce?"
Xiaojun just shrugged.
It was a long morning as they had buried Ti in the garden and it was really a heavy goodbye. Xiaojun was happy Renjun hasn't been here it would have been twice as difficult for him.
"Let's go to this address," whispered Yangyang when Taeyong has left them in the area of his dorm while he was going back to the hospital to stay with Renjun.
"What's there?"
"I found out they're selling a kitten that looks exactly like Ti."
"Ok," Xiaojun wasn't fully convinced to the idea but it was better than just sitting around and worrying so he followed Yangyang to the subway.
They crossed the city then found the cat owner's small shop. There were a lot of kittens in cages, all really cute but one looked exactly like Ti.
"Ey, she's perfect," Yangyang put his fingers through the bars to caress her paw.
"Looks like Ti but isn't Ti," Xiaojun lowered his head.
"Hey, no cat will ever be Ti but this one here will make Renjun happy, you'll see how he will brighten up after seeing her."
The doors behind them opened and the owner came in.
"Please sir this way I have only two kids looking at the cats."
Xiaojun turned around feeling he might faint when his gaze meet Jaemin's. His father stopped abruptly watching him in shock.
"Good morning sir," Yangyang bowed a little.
"So you had the same idea," asked Jaemin.
"Do you know them?" the owner glanced form them to him.
"It's my son and his best friends."
"So let's take Baby Ti and go to Renjun," said Yangyang. "Unless you have something to tell to your father," he gave Xiaojun a sign to speak.
"No I... there's nothing to say," whispered Xiaojun lowering his head.
"Ok boys take the kitten I'll pay for it," Jaemin took out his wallet when Yangynag's face became red.
"Xiaojun! Can you freaking start telling people how you feel! Can you tell them what you want to tell!" shouted Yangyang causing Xiaojun to open his mouth and close it again.
"I have nothing to say..." he whispered when Yangyang turned form him storming to the counter in the other room.
"I'll pay," he said taking a big bundle of banknotes out.
Xiaojun was watching in horror how he gave it to the owner who looked at Jaemin questioningly.
"Yangyang hide these, I'll pay, you're so far from home you'll need the pocket money," said Jaemin calmly.
"I will pay," muttered Yangyang with that stubborn furious face.
"Ok, let it be," Jaemin sighed hiding his wallet, he looked Xiaojun's way before leaving the building.
A moment later the owner counted the money.
"I'll give you the cat."
"Give it to that coward there it's his anyway," hissed Yangyang storming off slamming the front door shut.
An awkward silences fell, Xiaojun was standing there unsure what to do when the owner walked to the cage then took the kitten out bringing it to him.
"Take care of her boy," he said awkwardly when Xiaojun took the kitten in his arms, it was trembling hard, probably as much as him.
What would he like to tell, to freaking run behind Jaemin and yell - don't leave Renjun and your family, we need you to be here for us.
What couldn't he tell, not only to Jaemin, because starting to speak would mean telling them all would mean spilling his biggest secret. How has Yangyang pictured it, him coming as a bundle of ruins whispering - I want to be more than friends, freaking way more then friends, as I had a hopeless crush on you since day one and now after four years it's way not a crush anymore, I know you are my best friend and I'm risking it all telling you this but I love you.
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Thank you so much for your support. It was a very hard choice I made with Ti, it's really heartbreaking for me as the author as much as it's for you. So what do you think about Yangyang's idea? What about the boys meeting Jaemin and Yangyang's words? What will Xiaojun do?
Also my new Nomin book 'For Ellie' is out so I will really appreciate your feedback on it.
