𝔸 𝕃𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥 𝕚𝕟 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕜𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕤 ➁

65. A Christmas Dinner To Remember

It's been another week and Christmas is here. We're doing dinner at the Travers house but I didn't think it would be a wise idea if I went because I'm such shit at hiding my emotions. I knew the moment I saw Rae what had transpired between us would probably be all over my face. But then I assumed it would look even worse if I didn't show up.

Rae and I had made love not just once, but several more times before she left. She had laid in my arms and nothing had ever felt so right in my life. She belonged in my arms, not another mans, but she'd eventually had to leave and watching her go had made my heart hurt. But the feeling of hurt inside my chest wasn't unfamiliar when it came to Rae.

I'd spoken to Rae on the phone much later that night after she'd left my bed. Her voice had made my heart swell and also pained me, it was the most masochistic of sensations. It hurt but hearing her voice made me feel like I was falling in love with her all over again.

She'd told me she didn't tell Liam, that she wasn't going to tell him. When I hadn't responded she'd told me that she was going to but didn't want to tell Liam right before the holiday. Which I then understood, especially because she didn't want to ruin Jamie's first Christmas in Boston. That I definitely didn't want either.

That led to a week of only texting her, no other communication. I'd wanted to hold her, have her in my arms after being with her intimately again. She'd felt so good, just like I'd remembered. She's my person, the one that can make me feel things no one else can regardless of all the bullshit that's gone on between us.

So, tonight I'd pulled up to the house feeling the absolute dread flow through me. I knew having to watch Liam be husband to the woman I'd had cradled in my arms just a few days ago would just about fucking kill me. Yeah, Merry fucking Christmas to me.

Once I'd gone inside I'd been greeted by my father. He had given me a sad smile because I knew he knew. He always knows. I'd said hello to everyone else and watched as Rae took pictures in front of the family Christmas tree with Liam and Jamie. That moment is one I'd turned my back on and headed directly over to the whiskey for some liquid relief.

Everything seemed to be going seamlessly until dinner time. I'd studiously ignored Rae for the most part and she did the same with me. We'd kept our distance from one another, me making sure I didn't let my eyes linger on her for to long or longingly.

I'd played with Jamie a bit, but not much, also keeping my distance from him as well. He was too busy with Amelia anyway and I'd honestly been grateful for that fact because I could feel Liam's irritated glare on me any time I was near him or Rae. His resentment of me was practically palpable whenever we were in close proximity.

Our careful distance and Rae's plan to wait to tell Liam until after Christmas went to shit at dinner time. We'd all been making casual conversation when out of nowhere Liam asked Mr. Travers what he did last weekend. When Darren had said that he hadn't done much because he'd been swamped with a project at work, Liam had taken that opportunity to say it must've been nice to have Rae stay with them. When Darren had scrunched his brow in confusion I looked directly at Rae, who looked directly at me. We should've looked anywhere but at each other because the next moment I looked at Liam and you could tell he knew. He knew she was with me and I'd gather he knew I'd fucked his wife.

The look on his face had been absolutely murderous. If we all weren't sitting at Christmas dinner I'm sure he would've launched himself across the table at me. I'd probably have had a steak knife plunged directly into what holds his wife's true affection; my heart.

Rhys had quickly changed the topic to hockey which I had been seriously grateful for. Christmas dinner was definitely not the time nor the place to accuse a man of fucking your wife but you could tell Liam wanted to. Although he may have wanted to, he didn't. No, he stayed quiet for the rest of dinner, not saying a single word to anyone.