Unaccepted

Chapter 29: Triggers

TW: Ch. 17 reprise, very short and minor panic attack

Virgil's POV:

    So it's the day after the "Fitting In" video was uploaded and I'm feeling more at home. I'm still doing my daily cutting and starving but made the starving less noticeable. I'm still keeping my old clothes, but I'll use them if mine are dirty or I'll rarely use them as pajamas. I then heard a knock at my door.
"Yeah?"
"It's Roman"
"Ok"

I walked over to my door and opened it, seeing a glowing Princey. He looks even better with purple hair and his hotter outfit... Um, ahem...
"Hey Roman. What's up?" I asked casually, still sounding like my monotone dark self.
"Logan's helping Patton with some shit in his room, so it's just me and you and I'm bored. Wanna watch a movie?" He asked, smiling at the end, as if he already had a movie idea.
"Uhhh sure."
"What about Aladdin?"

    I wish to refuse to because of Once Upon a Time, but I don't want to be rude. But that was the question. What about Aladdin?
That thought repeated in my head over and over, replaying scenes of the nightmare.
"Hey, hey, hey, are you okay?" He asked, instantly looking worried as if he did something wrong... for once. I didn't know why he had asked until I realized I was shaking a little and my eyes were closed with clenched fists.
"S-sorry R-Roman" I choked out, breathing heavily.

In for 4, hold for 7, out for 8. Hahahaha. Damn it it's not working!–

    He put his hands on my shoulders making me open my eyes. He looked me right in the eyes. His eyes were filled with worry and guilt. But otherwise they shined so beautifully. Um...
"Virgil, what's wrong...?" He asked, keeping his hands on my shoulders.
"I-I... you... R-roman... Patton..." I stuttered out. I clenched my eyes shut and started breathing faster, feeling the panic getting stronger, drowning me.
"Shhh, it's ok honey, don't worry" He said, right hand rubbing my back and the other still on my shoulder. Wait did he just call me "honey"? Oh shoot. Crush alert, bitch.

    I started panicking more since my own crush, Prince fucking Roman, just called me HONEY. I took a deep breath, and held it. I finally said it.
"Did you just... call me... 'honey'?" I asked, nervously biting my bottom lip, looking up at him.
"No, I said buddy."
"Oh........ ok" I said. Haha, karma's a bitch, right? I looked away.

   "Can I come in?" Roman asks, breaking the awkward silence. I look up at him.
"Oh, uh – yeah sure." I said, moving out of the doorway. He walked in and sat down on my bed. Rude, he could've sat in the chair. It really doesn't matter. Haha, you sure? Uh, yeah. No. No you're fucking not.

    I cleared my throat nervously, "Dude, you could've sat on my chair, y'know..." I said. Fuck I didn't want to say that. Too bad, hehe... I sat down next to him.
"Well, I wanted to ask why you were... panicking," he said, looking away.

"So do you wanna talk about it..?" He asked nervous-sounding, giving me a nervous look. I gulped. "Uhh, y-yeah sure..." I managed.

    I cleared my throat. Why the hell does he want to listen? You know he's only listening to be nice, right? No he's not. Sure, you'll find out. Karma's a bitch, y'know. Shut the fuck up.

    I looked up at Princey. I realized Princey was looking at me nervously and looking away frequently because I was just staring off into space, zoned out.
"Oh... sorry, I spaced out" I said, looking away.  I cleared my throat (again).
"Remember when I explained my disturbing nightmare..?" All of them are usually disturbing, so nevermind... "I mean, not the one about Patton and Logan being..." I trailed off.
"Dead..." Roman said, sounding like he was going to puke if he had to think about that scene in my dream. The fuck are your visuals??