Living In My Head (Drarry)

Chapter 14: Only In Dreams

Chapter Song: Brighter Days by Leeland

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I wake up with a salty taste in my mouth from the tears. I let out a shaky breath and slip out of bed, heading towards the dorms, knowing for a fact that my bed is much more comfortable than the starched bedding. Slowly, I edge out towards the door and walk straight into Draco.

I let out a sharp hiss of pain and he whispers, startled, "Oh, Harry, you scared me."

I look up at him and I see his hand brush across my forehead.

I let out another hiss, "Wow, Harry, your head is bruised pretty badly."

I frown, taking his hand from my face, "I know that. Now."

He bites his lip, "Oh, sorry. What happened? I didn't see you around."

I start to correct him until I do the math, I passed out early Sunday, woke up around dinner, now it's early Monday.

Wait, why is he here on a school night?

"Why are you up so late?" I ask him, walking after him as he heads towards the dorm wing.

He shoves his hands in his pockets, frowning to himself, "No reason."

Suddenly, I laugh, "Were you worried?"

He shakes his head, "No. Definitely not."

I smile, "Thanks." He lets out a small, shy smile, "I'm glad you're okay."

Man, that's a nice smile.

It's so different.

I like it.

"You have a nice smile."

Oh, Christ, did I say that out LOUD?

"No homo." I blurt, inwardly face-palming, that phrase is the one thing that makes EVERYTHING sound gay.

He laughs, his smile growing.

Honestly, I really want to kiss him.

I don't care if that makes me gay.

I just want to be close to him.

"Thanks, Potter... I like yours too."

We share a small smile before saying our goodbyes and parting to our separate hallways. When I get to the dorm, I slink into the room and go to feed Castiel to find his food and water are full and the containers are cleaned. I notice Cas' food bag by Neville's nightstand. I make a mental note to thank him in the morning and slip into bed in the clothes from Saturday, not caring that I still have to change once the sun is up.

As I drift off to sleep, I wonder why Draco came to visit me, I wonder why the voices seem to stop when he's around, I wonder why I suddenly wanted to kiss him, and I wonder why- of all the people to feel attracted to- it had to be the one guy I can never have. When I close my eyes, I feel my face heat up as I imagine kissing him. Eventually, I manage to fall asleep.

...

~Monday- Day 7~

I wake up, much too early, to Neville shaking me awake.

"Come on, we'll be late for class!"

I realize that Draco smiling, leaning in to kiss me, was all a dream. I shoot out of bed, changing quickly, and running with Neville to class. We make it just in time and slip into our seats, Ron still at our group.

He gives me a dirty look, "Still gonna sit with me, even though I'm such an ass, Harry?"

I roll my eyes, "Go back to sleep, it's not like you pay attention anyway."

He puffs then lays his head down without comment.

Neville looks over at me worrily, waiting until Ron snores to talk.

"What happened?"

I lean back in my chair, "He was a jerk to 'Mione. She didn't deserve it."

He shook his head in dismay, "Harry, you're brave, but don't be stupid. Picking fights with the wrong person easily leads to being a bullying target."

I cross my arms, avoiding eye contact, "Is that what happened to you?"

He pauses as the teacher passes out papers, then speaks in a whisper when everyone starts on their work.

"Yes, actually, that is what happened. A friend of mine, Luna, was being picked on by Draco's brute friends and I confronted them. They called me a pussy and did a whole bunch of horrible things to me. Once they got their fill, they stopped, but I'm still on the social black list."

I wanted to apologize, but knew he didn't want me to be sorry for him.

"I understand. I'll pick my fights more wisely."

He smiles a bit, "You, me, and Hermione need to stick together. I think of you two as family, and family stands together."

I laugh a little, starting on the work, "Romance novel, much?"

He rolls his eyes, laughing, "Whatever. Anyway, you should meet Luna when she gets back from her trip. You guys would get along pretty well."

I work with him through the problems, taking a look at the clock every few minutes. If only time moved quickly in class.

Once class was over, we get up and scurry off to our next class. Snape greets me from where he's standing, outside the doorframe, and I say hello back. Neville goes off into a corner, sitting by himself, and I sit by 'Mione.

"Is that Luna's seat?" I ask curiously, gesturing towards where Neville's sitting.

"Yeah, he told you about her?"

I nod, and she smiles to herself, "He fancies her."

I furrow my eyebrows, "He what?"

She rolls her eyes, smiling at me, "He likes her, stupid."

I laugh, "Liking people makes you do stupid things, doesn't it?"

She shakes her head, "You have no idea."

Out of the corner of my eye, I glance towards Draco's empty seat as class starts.

Where is he?

His friends are gone too.

I sigh as Severus hands me my makeup work, which I was able to finish before the end of class.

Hermione places her hand on my shoulder, "Are you okay, Harry?"

I nod shakily, "I'll be fine."

I'll be alright.

Nothing is wrong.

Nothing is the matter with me.

I'm not crazy.

I'm not.

Liar.