Living In My Head (Drarry)

Chapter 46: End of Chimes

A.N.

Chapter song: Dream a Little Dream of Me by The Moon Loungers

(in the style of The Mamas and the Papas)

Narcissa is already home by the time I descend the stairs, meeting me in the foyer on my way to the kitchen. I give her a brief and polite smile before retreating to the table. The talk from earlier still bothered me and I had to make sure not to bring it up again, under any circumstance. The dinner goes by fairly smooth, Dobby and Narcissa talk pleasantly about the weather while I eat as fast as I can without looking too rushed. I excuse myself when I finish and return to the small library. I have to read to get my mind off what Narcissa told me, otherwise her words will echo in my mind until Draco returns.

There is no disappointment in comfort.

God, the phrase shouldn't bother me so much, but it does. Draco and I are pretty comfortable right now, does that mean that we'll eventually settle for convenience? That is, if I haven't scared him off, my mind supplies. Regardless, though, I don't want to be with him out of the feeling of obligation. I want us to wake up spooning and all the gooey stuff that comes with a stable relationship, I don't want fear of rejection and uncertainty. That's too much to ask for, isn't it?

I don't light the candle again, but I choose the book Frankenstein and try to immerse myself before getting too lost in my thoughts. It works fairly well. By the time I get tired, it's pitch black outside. I take notice of the page and leave the book on the table, the grandfather clock on the ground floor chiming the time. I count them, my eyes watching the shoreline through the window.

One...

Two...

Three...

Four...

Five...

Six...

Seven...

Eight...

Nine...

Ten...

Eleven.

The chimes stop.

I move into a sitting position and rub my eyes, slouched forward. I hope the other 5 days won't be like this. I stand, shower, and brush my teeth before getting into bed. I don't visit Castiel to say goodnight, because if I do... I'll see Zorro. Then I definitely won't be able to sleep. I do sleep, though, and a familiar dream reappears. Albeit, a little different than before.

In my dream, the same as before, I was standing in a field with the Whomping Willow in the distance, the empty land flourishing with lush grass up to my waist. The wind still blew through the grass and my hands running atop the soft grass. I stood, unlike the previous dream, Draco standing against the wind. He was still wearing his uniform, his tie was absent and his shirt unbuttoned, his eyes closed with a complacent smile. I could hear his humming this time, he was humming Dream a Little Dream of Me. I reached out my hand and caressed his cheek, finding myself smiling at the song, it seemed just like him to like such a song. He smiled, laughing as he placed his hand over mine, continuing to hum and whispering the lyrics under his breath. He runs a hand through my hair and goes to whisper in my ear but the dream ends.

...

~Monday: Day 14~

I wake up with a sour taste in my mouth, I must've been snoring in my sleep. I don't panic like the day before, there's no particular reason to. Opening my bag, I notice the notes from Draco I shoved in the bottom and sigh, picking up my socks from beside them. I pad down the stairs, Narcissa seemingly already gone to work. That's fine with me. I'll just grab some food, maybe have a chat with Dobby, and go back to reading Frankenstein.

I am met with the sight Dobby kneeling in front of the open windows of the kitchen, clutching a rosary that seems to be made of amber in his hands. I don't disrupt him, watching in silence as his face is calm, thumb absently stroking the cross at the end, mouthing to himself. It seems almost unreal to me. The light shining in on all sides of his face, an expression of bliss. I grew up in the house of the Dursleys, a family that went to church but never seemed to grasp what they were being taught. I was never allowed to go, with the "chores to do" and all. So seeing Dobby so lifted gave me a feeling of jealousy. How it must feel to believe in something so wholeheartedly. I could never trust something so blindly.

I exhale a shallow sigh and Dobby's eyes flash open, a complacent smile on his face. "Excuse me just a moment longer, I'm almost finished."

"Don't worry about it." I smile, moving to sit beside him. I don't pray with him, I never have so I wouldn't exactly know how. No doubt I would end up sounding like I'm ordering off a menu if I did so.

I stifle an inner laugh as I imagine myself praying as if reading off of a menu. Yeah, uh, I'll have the eternal soul... uhm, the large order of sin redemption... oh, and a side of pigeon wings with the righteous sauce. I look over and Dobby is still praying, unaffected by my presence.

I take this moment to get a good look at Dobby, I had never given him more than a sparing glance before, but now his features seemed clearer to me in his calmness. His nose is rather birdlike, with thin lips and a yellow tint to his skin. Lines of age were deepest on his forehead and around his eyes. He was clean-shaven, his hair more grey than the dark brown it used to be, small places reminding of a time when the hair had been dark. His jaw was sharp, and his chin almost pointed.

His left eye opened, a faded shade of blue, his expression gaining a hint of amusement, "If you wish to take a picture, Master Harry, I assure you it will last longer."

He rises, crossing himself, and I bat him on the arm.

"You sure are a dreadful old man, aren't you, Dobby?"

"I do my best," he responds, "Would you like me to warm up some breakfast?"

"Yes, if you wouldn't mind. I want to read again, today."

"Which one now?"

"Frankenstein."

"Very good story. Harry, why don't you read downstairs? I promise I will do my best to not bother you."

"Would you mind?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I did."

"Okay, then," I smile, "I'll bring down the book."

A.N.

Previous version of the dream was in "Chapter 29: O' Departed Joys"! :)

ALSO:

I am a semi-practicing Wiccan, that being said:

I will NOT diss any religions and I expect none of you will in the reviews, either.

Any mention of religion in this story is not my personal opinion of the religion itself;

but of the characters and how they treat their religious practice reflects their personality.

I do not want any reviews mentioning your religion (that's your own business) or saying it's better than anyone else's.

I know this goes without saying, it being common courtesy and all, but I'm saying it anyway.

If you wish to tell me in private something about how I've portrayed something, feel free.

But I will delete any review or PM involving religion-bashing.

Thanks,

~deathbyinsomnia

Also, if you want an idea how I picture human!Dobby, he's basically Peter Capaldi from Doctor Who. xD