Chapter 46

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"Wow." Austin chuckled to my remark.

"I didn't mean it like that-"

"You sure about that?" He said harshly while crossing his arms.

"Can you just stop being a dick for one minute." A partially shouted.

He sat down in the recliner across from me "Then what did you mean.."

"I wish I never met you because your life would be so much better. You think it doesn't hurt me to see you like...." I picked up the empty beer can and crushed them in my hand, "Like this?! Well, in case you didn't know, it does! A lot!"

He nodded his head slow with sudden sadness in his eyes.

"But, even if I wouldn't have set up meeting you, I think our paths would've crossed and we still would've ended up together."

"Set up meeting me?"

I thought back. I've never told Austin my arrangements I made when he moved here.

"Yeah. Uh. When I heard you were moving here, I wanted to make a new friend that no one could twist their mind into thinking I'm a bad person..that seat where you sit in front of me eighth hour..is actually Kayla's seat..."

He smiled a half smile that was genuine, "So pretty much you loved me before you knew me?"

"Yeah I guess you could say that..like I said. I think either way we go about it, our paths would've

crossed one way or another."

He got up in weak manner. You could tell he was still sore.

He walked over and leaned down to lightly hugged me, "I'm sorry, Jen."

I hugged back, "I love you, Austin."

I felt him breathe in hard. I let go to look at him.

Austin had tears rolling down his cheek. He was lightly crying.

He sat down beside me never breaking our stare.

I wiped the tears away and kissed him so gently.

He reached up and ran his fingers through my hair, kissing me again.

I trembled a little. He smiled at my weakness and smashed another kiss on me.

I felt myself get hot and my face get red.

He slid his tongue into my mouth and I pulled away, "Stop. Stop."

"What's wrong?"

"Just stop...you know...we.."

"What??"

"We shouldn't be doing any of this.."

"Well we can't do it if either of our moms are home.."

"Austin."

He raised a brow.

"Just no. We know better."

"Do we?" He said sensually and ran his hand up the back of my shirt and kissed me passionately yet sloppily.

"Austin! Is that the beer talking?" I said with mean manner.

He stared at me. You could tell he was annoyed with me.

I got up and grabbed my purse, "Text me when you're sober."

He rolled his eyes and waved me out the door.

***

I laid down on my bed and listened to music.

I couldn't believe it.

Austin was acting like such an idiot. He was drinking for crying out loud!

I cranked my music up trying to block my own thoughts.

But it was like the louder my music got, the louder my thoughts got.

I need to clear my mind.

I got up and began to clean my room. And dust. And vacuum. And make my bed.

But the thoughts still stuck around.

My mom barged into my room, "Jennifer! Turn it down!" She was screaming over my music.

"I'm sorry.."

"I've been yelling at you for 15 minutes!!"

"I'm sorry.."

She nodded her head and walked out closing the door behind her.

I plopped onto my freshly made bed and turned my attention to the outside of my window.

A tear trickled down my face.

Why can't Austin and I just get along?!

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