Being in love was the most intense feeling I had ever had. It felt like nothing could go wrong and just everything was right when I was with him. I never thought I would see the day that the love I had for him turned into hate. I hated what he did, what we became as a couple things tore us apart and I was left wondering if things could be fixed.
It was getting that time of the year where the air became cold and the smell of cinnamon was in the air. All I wanted was to spend Christmas with my family but I didn’t think that I was coming home this Christmas. Watching the snow fall from my room, wanting to be free once more I wanted to go home. I finally found out that I was going home the first of December and I knew I would make the best of this Christmas and just spending time with my family. “I’m glad you home” my mum said. “Glad to be home” I said with a smile. I had finally gotten better from my eating disorder and finally feeling like myself. Austin was the one that put me in rehab and something was telling me that I could never forgive him. I hated being away from the ones I loved so why would he tear me down when I was already down on myself? “Austin wants to see you” she said. “i don’t want to see him, I’m sorry but I don’t want to see him” I said. “It’s understandable” she said. “i need time” I said. She nodded her head as we got home, they had a welcome home party for me and there wasn’t anything that could keep the smile from my face. This was the reason why I was fighting so hard and I didn’t want anyone to take that from me. “Hey?” Austin said. “Hey” I said as I walked away from him. “Can we talk?” he asked. “Nothing to talk about” I said. “Why?” he said. “Austin just drops it” I said. “No not till you talk to me” he said as he grabbed my arm. “Austin what done is done just stop” I said as I pulled my arm away. “No I love you” he said. “Austin just stop” I said as I walked upstairs. Later on that night we had a dinner party and just spent time together as a family, the band was part of our family because it was who my dad was. “Talk to me?” Austin asked. “i just leave it alone Austin!” I said. “Please” he asked. I sighed and grabbed his hand taking him outside so he could talk about god know what, I loved him I did but what he did I didn’t think I could forgive him. “Talk you have 5 minutes” I said. “Why are you mad at me?” he said. “Because I am” I said. “Explain please?” he said. “You put me in that place Austin” I said. “Because you needed it” he said. “You took me away from everything and you took me from you” I said. “Baby I didn’t want you to be away from me I swear I wanted you to get better” he said. “What’s done is done” I said. “What does that mean? Drop the act, I was protecting you because you weren’t doing a very good job” he said. “Austin just stop” I said. “No you need to realize who’s in your corner helping you instead you think we are tearing you down when we are not! You’re doing it to yourself” he said. I looked down as I felt the tears build up in my eyes, I knew he was right but I didn’t know what to do. “See I didn’t want that to happen” he said as he lifted my chin wiping my eyes. “I love you and I did what was best for you even if it tore me apart” he said. “Did it?” I said. “Yes it did, you think I wanted to be away from you?” he said. “You sure seemed like you wanted me gone” I said. “Never baby I wanted you to get better” he said. I looked down as I started to feel horrible about the situation, I cut off the one person that I loved and I was wondering if we could ever get back to how we was. “Baby I love you and I want you please give me another chance?” he said. “I would like that” I said. “Come on lets get you inside before you get sick” he said as he wrapped his arms around me. We walked back inside and sat down so we could eat together, that night we spent cuddled up by the fireplace watching movies with our families