Day Eighteen, Who I Wish I Was

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Dear Me,

  I wish I was more sure, less insecure. More out there, less in here. I wish I was fearless. I seem fearless, like I don't care what anyone thinks. Truth, I'm a good actress. Small things crush me, and it sucks. I'm getting better though, there's times I feel weightless, like I can do anything. Those times don't really last long, and I go back to contemplating what people are going to think. I spend too much time worrying. I wish I could just feel free. I'm really open, it's a terrible thing. Being open is just another word for vunerable really.. Everyone knows most of my backround problems. Everyone. I openly put it in peoples faces when they act like they know the reasons for how I am. Oh well. The only big problem is I have problems saying no to people. I wish I thought more clearly about decisions. I wish my vision didn't get clouded so easily. But the person I am, will soon become the one I want to be. I can feel it. I believe in myself.

    Love,

      Me

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