Night Air

Chapter 68

*Alyssa's POV*

I woke up and it was Friday. It didn't feel like it was my last Friday on the tour, but it was. It was my last day for a lot of things, I just didn't realize it at the time. It didn't even hit me as I stepped out of the shower that morning for the last time or as I pulled out my last outfit from my bag. It didn't feel real, but it was. It was the last day of the tour, and I didn't have a God damn clue where I was going with my life after I got on that plane that night.

The taxi ride to the Eiffel Tower felt odd. I admired the city, knowing in my gut it would be my last day there, but not believing it in my brain. It had yet to hit me, even though I kept telling myself over and over again that the tour was going to be over in a matter of hours. It was like I couldn't even convince myself anymore. There was so much more I wanted to do, but at the same time, nothing at all. I had been in Paris for a month and on the tour for three and had done everything I wanted to do and more, but something still felt incomplete. Maybe it was because I felt like I was forgetting about something, or maybe it was because I wanted to be talking to someone and figuring out some unexplained information. For example, was I going to be able to keep in touch with Niall after this or was he going to up and leave to return to his normal life like I was just some fling?

I couldn't even make myself believe that, to be honest. Nothing felt real anymore. I wanted to go home, but I wanted the modeling tour to never end all at the same time. I also wanted Ryan and my dad and Stan to go home- only without me. Maybe what I wanted was to just go back to the way it was between me and Niall at the beginning of the tour- only at home. No more rules, no more hotel rooms, no more sneaking around, and no more hiding things. I wanted a real "us".

Eventually, the cab stopped in front of the beautiful tower and I quickly rushed into the tents, catching Niall out of the corner of my eye with one of the other girls on set. I ignored it and plopped down in front of a smiling Lou, curling wand already in hand. "Hey, there!" She chirped.

I smiled at her reflection. "Hey, Lou." She smiled wider back at me and got started on parting, combing, and then curling my hair. She didn't say much, but that's usually how it went. We usually had kept conversation light and she only ever brought up Niall a few times. When she did, it was usually a quick conversation. Lou wasn't dumb. She knew (just like everyone else probably did) that there was something between us. No one besides Niall, myself, and Steph knew anymore than that, but that was okay. It wasn't their business and ignorance was bliss for both their sake and my sake. Everyone just kind of turned a blind eye to us since they didn't exactly have any evidence of us breaking rules.

I sighed at my reflection in the mirror that showed I had half of my hair curled into tight curls. I had changed so much in the last three months and I hadn't even noticed much. I had started to become more of a rule breaker and less of a prude who thought she was above it all. Thanks to Niall and Stephany, I started to live a little bit more and find out what adventure really felt like. Three months ago, I would have scoffed at who I had become, but now, I was scoffing at my old self- the me who never did anything wrong, who was the perfect, innocent square, who just had a sad and harmful childhood. Now, I didn't know what I was. I knew I was worried about my future, but I knew it would all work out okay.

A lot had happened in three months to change me. I met Niall, I shared kisses with someone I regret meeting, I shared kisses with someone and ended up falling in love with them, I went to parties, I met my long-lost brother, I got arrested, I had a reunion with my old bully, I found out things my father did behind my back, and I lost my virginity to the first man I've ever truly felt real love for. I guess it was safe to say that this tour had been a real life changer.

Half an hour later, my makeup was complete and my hair was curled to perfection. I smiled at my reflection, once again, never disappointed with Lou's work. "Thanks, Lou."