dempeo/merder oneshots

you have to believe

"That girl, huh?" Bailey says. "That same.. little girl, that's following her handsome attending all around the hospital.. breaking all the rules.. having sex in cars.. no one and nobody else matters.. it doesn't matter that he's your boss.. not that he's already married!" She says.

"No! Enough.. enough now!" I say. She looks at me. I feel nicks eyes on me too. "You don't get to talk about derek.. this isn't about derek.. you have no right to talk about him" I say.

"Well, it's the same.. isn't it? Pulling the same mistakes all over again, years later" she says.

"You think that was a mistake? You think giving derek a chance was a mistake? If I hadn't have dated him I- I wouldn't be who I am today.. I probably wouldn't be alive right now if it wasn't for him" I say.

She scoffs. "This is not the same as me and derek.. I'm moving to minnesota for my job! I want to save people's lives.. the way those doctors didn't do for my husband" I say.

"If derek were here right now he'd be fully supportive of me.. I'm not doing this for a relationship, and you know that.. you know I wouldn't do that after derek" I say.

"I'm doing this because it's what I want to do.. its my decision.. and keep mine and Derek's relationship out of your mouth.. we- he treated you like family.. we named our damn kid after you and you can't even support me on this one thing" I say, walking away.

I run to an on-call room. I put my hand on my chest as tears run down my cheeks. I slide down the door, onto the floor. I put my head in my hands, trying to calm myself down.

"Are you okay?" He asks. I look up. "Go away" tears run down my cheeks. "Stupid question.. you don't look okay" he walks over to me, sitting next to me.

"Why can I see you? I thought, leaving the beach would- am I dying?" I ask. He laughs. "No" he says. "Don't laugh at me" I can't help but grin, nudging him. I gasp. "I can feel you" I put my hand on his arm.

"Spooky" he teases. I glare at him. "That means we can do dirty things together and you'll be able to feel everything" he smirks, moving closet to me. I roll my eyes.

"You'd tell me if I was hurt though, right?" I ask seriously. "Of course I would.. you know I'd never do that to the kids" he says.

"I can't believe you shouted at bailey" he says. "She was talking about you" I say. "You're hot when you're defending me" he smirks.

"Stop flirting with me" I giggle. "Why? You're new boyfriend might get jealous?" He rolls his eyes. "Looks like someone else is jealous" I grin. "I can be however jealous I want" he says. I giggle.

"And he's not my boyfriend.. we've not even slept together" I mumble. "I know" he says. "How do you- do you watch in.. when I'm- if I-" I ask.

"No.. I can only appear if we're thinking about eachother at the same time" he says. "Oh.. OH!" I realise, looking at him.

"You should really not be thinking about your dead husband when you're sleeping with someone else" he grins. I put my head in my hand embarrassed. He chuckles.

"Meredith?" Nick knocks on the door. I get up. "Don't say anything" I whisper. He glares at me. My eyes go wide. "Right" I chuckle softly.

Nick walks in. "Are you okay?" He puts his hand on my waist. "Ahh!" Derek points at his hand. "I'm okay" I whisper.

"You sure?" He asks. I nod. He leans in to kiss me. I look at derek. "I um-" I pull away. Derek let's out a breath, not going unnoticed by me.

"I'm watching you" Derek glares at nick. "It just brought up a lot of stuff.. with derek, you know?" I say. He nods.

"I- I can.. I can see him" I say quietly. "What?" He asks. "Derek.. I can see him.. now.. he's- like, I can talk to him.. and he'll talk back" I say nervously. He looks at me curiosity.

"I know.. its weird.. but-" I say. "No, its not weird.. you're probably still mourning him.. he was important to you.. you talk to your dead family all the time.. it must be nice to hear something back once in a while" he says.

"No, nick.. I can see him.. he's here.. I can touch him and talk to him and.. smell him" I say. "You like my new conditioner?" Derek asks. I Ignore him. "Meredith.. its fine, he's your husband" he says.

"But.. I still love him" I say. "I love you too baby!" Derek says as he lays on the bed, bouncing a ball from his hand to the ceiling. I try my best to ignore him. "That makes sense" nick says.

"You- you don't mind? It's not.. weird to you?" I ask. "Its a little weird" he chuckles softly. "But-" I say. "But its probably more common than you think" he says. I nod, not believing him.

"I wanna keep seeing him" I say. "Well that-" he says. "No.. I wanna keep.. seeing him.." I say. "Okay" he says. "That's okay?" I ask. "As long as you see me too" he grins. I chuckle softly, nodding.

"Is he here right now?" He asks. "..yeah" I say. "So I can't kiss you?" He asks. "No.. my husbands a very jealous man" I grin.  He chuckles, shaking his head. He leaves.

"He thinks I'm craz-" I turn around to face him. He's right infront of me. He looks into my eyes. I put my hands on his cheeks, kissing him passionately. He pushes me up against the door.

I pull away from him slowly. My eyes feel teary. "I can feel your lips against mine" I gently brush my thumb over his lips.

"Mine are the only lips that should be touching yours" he kisses my thumb. I giggle against it as my thumb blocks our lips from touching.

I move my hand, kissing him again. I wrap my arms around his neck as our tongues fight. "I missed you so much" I say against his lips. He picks me up, carrying me to the bed.

----- (SORRY SORRY SORRY)

We're laid next to eachother naked. I rest my head on his chest, making patterns on his chest with my finger. He wraps his arm around me.

"That was incredible" I whisper. "It was" he whispers. "I still feel like I'm missing you" I say. "I'm right here" he says. "Nobody else can see you.. how do I know you're really here?" I say.

"You just have to believe" he whispers. I look at him. "I love you, derek shepherd" I whisper. "I love you so much more" he smiles. "Liar" I whisper. I kiss him deeply.

1159 words