South Park x reader oneshot

By timerlor

274K 3.7K 3K

Request are opened Just some oneshots between you and characters of South Park! ~Currently on hold~ More

Request
This Isn't The End- Kyle Broflovski X Reader
This Isn't The End - Kyle Broflovski X reader 2
Satisfied - Stan Marsh × One Sided Reader
Jealous Much? - Craig Tucker × reader
Unlikely Couple - Tweek Tweak
Closer - Token × Male! Reader
A Guy That I'd Kinda Be Into - Kenny Mccormick
Cutie - Butters × Dom! Male! Reader
Not Like Any Other Girl - Clyde Donovan
My R - Pete Thelman × Suicidal ! Reader
The Silent Type - Douchebag × Male! Reader
Prince of Hell - Damien (Soulmate AU)
Je pense que je t'aime - Christophe × Deaf!Male!Reader
Love you too - Drunk! Kyle Broflovski
[Soulmate AU ] Coffee date - Tweek Tweak
Friends ? - Eric Cartman × Shy ! Reader
[Hogwarts Au] Anything - Craig Tucker
We married as a job -Token Black
[Mafia Au ] This is new - Stan Marsh
[Hogwarts Au ] I'm his what now ? - Kenny Mccormick
[Flower Shop Au ] Bunny - Butter Scotch
[Omegaverse Au] Heat - Alpha! Douchebag × Omega!Reader
Who said confessing had to be on Valentine's ?- Tweek Tweak
[Mermaid Au ] Well , I would fuck me too - Eric Cartman × Male!Mermaid!Reader
[Imperial AU ] A handful - Emperor! Kyle Broflovski
In the future - Kitsune! Craig Tucker × Child ! Reader
[Howarts Au ] I'm his what now ? - Kenny McCormick Pt 2
[Hogwarts Au] Easy as pie - Clyde Donovan
[Reincarnation + Hogwarts Au] Bullshit - Damien Thorn
Kawaii - Chibi!Neko!Douchebag
[Mermaid Au ] Love you too - Eric Cartman × Male!Mermaid!Reader pt 2
[Hanahaki Au ] Same here - Pete Thelman× Neko!Reader
[College Au ] Kicked out - Kenny McCormick × Male ! Reader
[Mafia Au] Little Song Bird - Kyle Broflovisk
[College Au ] Kicked out - Kenny McCormick Pt 2
[Soulmate Au ] That red string - Child ! Butter scotch × Child ! Reader
This isn't right - Stan Marsh
[Slavery Au] Mine - Clyde Donovan × Slave ! Reader
Letter from your childhood sweetheart - Craig Tucker
I'm not the only one - Kenny McCormick
Stayed a while longer - Eric Cartman
I'll be waiting - Craig Tucker Pt.2
[The Boy Au ] Comfort - Pip Pirrip
[Cannibalism Au] Fear - Token Black
Different - Kyle Broflovisk
[Hogwarts Au] Date - Tweek Tweak
[Hogwarts Au] Amortentia - Kyle Broflovisk
A/n
[Fantasy Au] Demon baby - Damien
[Gods Au] Drunken habit - Stan Marsh
Character look alike - Douchebag
[Mafia Au ] Interest - Token Black
Possiblity - Christophe × Cheerleader! Reader
Kitsune!Craig Tucker × Child!Reader Pt 2
Family-Dad!Craig Tucker × Mom!Reader
[Hogwarts Au] I'm his what now ? - Kenny McCormick pt 3
[Royalty Au] Everyone has secrets - Slight Yandere!Pip Pirrip
[Vampire Au ] Wisdom teeth -Vampire!Craig × Reader
[Fantasy Au] Plot Twist - Half demon!Douchebag × Sorceress!Reader
[Mafia Au] This is new - Stan Marsh Pt 2

Gay or European ? - Christophe × Male ! Reader

2.3K 37 21
By timerlor


Note : I can't believe I'm actually doing this ... oh well , what's done is done . Hope you guys like this trash I made and hopefully you guys can excuse any mistakes I made ,oh and , is Christophe even European ?

No one's pov .

Bebe eyes suspiciously at Christophe who was sitting across from her while she ate her lunch . Clyde , curious to what his girlfriend was looking at , he asked her what was on her mind .

"Well , hasn't it come to you that Christophe might be ... gay ? "

Wendy and Red who were sitting beside her choked on their drink while Clyde and Stan stiffed a laugh . Wendy stared at Bebe in shock , "What would make you think that Christophe , of all people , is gay ? " Bebe rolled her eyes at Wendy , "You really want me to tell you the reason ? "

As Wendy nodded her head , Bebe immediately pointed out the obivious .

" There ! Right there ! Look at that tan well tintied skin , look at that killer shape his in ! Look at that slightly , stubly chin . Oh please his gay , totally gay !

" I'm not about to celebrate , every trait could indicate the totally straight expotriate . This guy's not gay , I say not gay ! "

Bebe glared at Clyde as he protested against her belief , I mean who would ?

That is the elephant in the room , well , is it relevant to assume
That a man who wears perfume is automatically radically fey ?

"But look at his quoft and crispy locks , look at his silk translucent socks . "

"There's the eternal paradox , look what we're seeing . "

"What are we seeing ? "

"Is he gay  ? "

"Of course his gay ! "

"Or European ! "

Bebe took a thought to process before agreeing , Red and Stan were starting to agree but Wendy was still on the edge .

" Ohhhhh .... "

They all look towards where Christophe was sitting at as they tired to find some sort of evidence that he was either gay or straight or maybe even being European .

Gay or European ? It's hard to guarantee ,is he gay or European ?

"Wait guys , does he even have a boyfriend if he is gay ? " Once they heard what Stan said , they immediately look at him as if he had the answer . Sadly , he didn't and he put his hands up in his defence .

"Well hey don't look me ! "

"You see , they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports , they play peculiar sports ! "

In shiny shirts and tiny shorts ! Gay or foreign fella ? The answer could take weeks !

" What does this have to do with European ? Yeah sure they both say things like "ciao bella" , while they kiss you on both cheeks ."

"Oh please ! " Bebe rolled her eyes at Wendy's explanantion .

Gay or European ? So many shades of grey  .

" Wendy , girl , your forgetting that depending on the time of day , the french go either way ."

Red told her , in which , Wendy could only groan but deep inside , she was also curious in whether Christophe was gay or European .

Is he gay or European ? Or ...

"There,  right there ! "

It seems that Wendy had enough of their stupid converstaion taht she was apart of and whispered loudly while she pointed at Christophe .

"Look at that condenscending smirk , seen it on every guy at school ! That is a metro-hetro jerk , that guy's not gay,  I say , no way ! "

That is the elephant in the room , well ,is it relevant to presume that a hottie in that costume .

"But look at what his wearing , isn't obivious that what his wearing is automatically , radically , ironically , cronically , scurnity, certainly , genetically , medically  , Gay ! Offically gay ! Offically gay , gay , gay , gay - "

Wendy cut her off as she was getting sort of annoying by repeatedly saying 'gay' over and over again ,

Damn it !
Gay or European ?

"But I must admit , he does look so stylish and relaxed . "

Bebe , upon hearing that , made a victory noise and fisting her fist up and down like a mad woman .

Is he Gay or European ?
I think his chest is waxed .

"But don't they bring their boys up different there ,it's culturally diverse . "

It's not a fashion curse ! If he wears a kilt or bears a purse .

"So is he gay or just exotic ? I still can't crack the code ! "

Stan asked in confusion as it was taking a toll on his brain now and because he really just want to enjoy his lunch period .

Yeah his accent is hypnotic , but his shoes are pointy toed .
Huh .

"So is he gay or European ? Cause there's starting to have so many shades of gray like 50 shades of grey ! "

But if he turns out straight , I'm free at 8 on saturday !
Is he gay or European ? Gay or European ? Gay or Euro -

"Guys ! I have an idea to shut all of you up about this gay shit ! So wait a minute and give me a chance to find out whether he is gay or European as I have an idea I'd like to try . "

"Then give it a go Wendy ! We'll be slightly behing watching . "

The floor is yours .

Wendy walked towards the table where Christophe was sitting at with some of his friends . And when she reached him , she place a hand on his shoulder and ask if she could ask a couple of question . Christophe , though not liking Wendy touching , agreed , if that was what was going to get rid of her ,

So , Mr ___  , this alledged affair with Miss ____ has been going on for  ? 
                                                                                           

                         
"So , Christophe , I heard you'd been dating with ( R / n ) -Random name- for how long now ? "

Christophe narrowed his eyes at her question but answered anyways .

" 2 years . "

"And your first name is ? "

Nicos ( is that how you spell it ? )

"Don't really have a first name . "

"And your boyfriend's name is ? "

Christophe , who had let his guard down for just that moment , answered the question that he had the actual answer to .

" (M/n) "

But the time he realized his horrifying mistake , it was all ready too late .

*gasp*

Oh well was really funny to Wendy .

"I'm sorry , I sorter misunderstood ! You said boyfriend I thought you said ... best friend ! (M/N) is my bestfriend . "

(R/N) jaws drop , you see , ( R/n) was Christophe's fake girlfriend to squash out the rumors that said that he was gay back in middle school . She did this , well , because she was happy for him and (M/n) to be in a relationshio and plus , she would have a set of gay friends to hang out with !

"You bastard ! You lying bastard ! That's it , I'm not covering for you nor (M/n) anymore . Wendy take a sit and (M/n) here will explain the whole shit for you , while I'll go get some more food , "

Peoples !  I have a big announcement !

Wendy looked at (M/n) with interet while she waitied for an explanation . Seeing as she won't leave if she got her explanation , he decided to just tell her.

"Well , yeah , I guess . I'm Chris's here boyfriend . Don't really know how you found out about him being gay till now ."

"So is he gay or European ? "

"Well , I guess this man is gay AND European !

"Woah ! This is a surprise , so how long you guys been dating ? Doesn't your lover here feel any disgrace about being found out ?"

And neither is disgrace ,

"I don't think so ? Well at least that's what I think , "

Oh !
You gotta stop your being a completely closet case
D'oh !

Wendy hummed in response , this was really getting interesting , so the whole Christophe dating (R/n) was a fake to remove all the rumors of him being gay back in middle school .

"So let me get the straight , it's not (R/n) that his seeing ? "

" Yup , it's me not her his seeing , no matter what he say . I swear he never ever ever swing the other way . "

"How would you know , for all you know , I might be straight but felt sorry for you when you confessed to me . "

(M/n) felt something 'pop' within him as he gave Christophe a 'death' glare . "You don't need to lie to me Chris I know that deep inside you , you have accepted the fact that you are gay no matter the facts . You big gay parfait . " he muttered the last part .

You are so gay , you big parfait , you flaming boy in cabaret .

"But I'm straight ! " Christophe protested .

(M/n) leaned towards him as he whispered something to him that made his cheeks heat up . "But you were not yesterday . "

So if I may , I'm proud to say , his gay !
And European !

"So he's gay ."

"And European Wendy , don't forget about that ."

He's gay
And European
And gay !

" Fine okay , I'm gay . Happy ? "

(M/n) nodded his head as he leaned against him with relaxation . This left Wendy pleased with her result and thanked them for their time . When she sat back at her table , she was filled with questions from the guys but she didn't bother telling them the answer since deep inside , she was rooting for them as well and hope for their relationship to soar .

Horay !

_____________________________________

*breathes in heaVily *

WhAt HaVe I wRittEn ???

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