Hi friends ♥️ a new chapter is here!! This one's about both Joshie and Ty! Again some time skips happening & I hope you enjoy it! I've been feeling under the weather so I've been able to write more, makes me really happy! I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. Thank you for being here, appreciate you all so so much!
Please don't forget to leave a like & I'd love to hear your thoughts too. If I get enough likes I might be able to upload an extra chapter tomorrow! So Thursday and Friday both!
Enjoy ♥️
Word count: 3965
~~
"Did he hurt you here?" Fred asked as he gently touched Josh's neck. "Yeah, he... bit me", Josh softly said. It gave him shivers; it disgusted him.
"Let me get you something to cool that with", Fred said as he pressed a kiss on Josh's forehead. Josh nodded and Fred left their dorm, then came back soon after with a cold pack. He wrapped it in a towel and held it to Josh's neck. "Here you go, boyfriend', he said. Josh smiled softly. "Thank you, boyfriend", he replied. He could get used to saying that to Fred.
"You have to let me know all of your shifts where you have to lock up without Colin or Gracie", Fred said. "If it's just you, or you and Elisabeth, I will come get you. Not gonna let you do that alone, not anymore. I can't risk your safety", he said.
"I love you", Josh said. "Sorry, I know we just became a thing like... seven minutes ago", he said. Fred let out a soft laugh as he sat down next to him. "That's okay. We've already said that to each other like a month ago, at Bonnaroo", he smiled. "I love you too, Joshie", he spoke.
"I'm never gonna get tired of hearing that", Josh softly said. Fred let out a soft laugh and he kissed Josh again. "Me neither. I hope you'll tell me that many times a day", he said. "Oh you be careful what you wish for 'cause I will tell you ever minute of the day", Josh said. "Yes please", Fred smiled. "As I said, I'm pretty obsessed with you, so..." he trailed. "That makes two of us", Josh shrugged. "'Cause I'm really fucking obsessed with you", he giggled. "I love you", Fred laughed gently as he hugged Josh tightly.
"How are you feeling now baby?" He asked. "Much better", Josh said. "He made me feel like absolute shit and I felt so fucking weak... but you made me feel so much better by asking me to be your boyfriend", Josh blushed. "That made me really happy. Thank you for that", he said. "Don't thank me for that, I'm not doing that just for you. I'm doing it because I so badly want that too", Fred said. "Which means you don't ever have to thank me for being with you. It's not a charity case, it's just my unconditional love for you", he said.
Somehow, that really meant a lot to Josh, hearing that. He guessed that had been an underlying fear; Fred being with him because he felt sorry. He didn't want that. He reminded himself of the fact that Fred had been crushing on him for so long already; he genuinely loved him. That helped.
"I can't believe he tried to get to you again", Fred then muttered softly as he looked at Josh's neck, before he covered it back up with the ice pack. "I- I told him to leave me alone so- so maybe he'll understand I-I'm serious this time", Josh muttered. "I hope so. I wanna punch him in the face so bad", Fred said. "Don't, I can't lose you", Josh said softly. Fred looked at him, and he nodded. "Okay", he said. "I won't, only if there's no other choice. If the only choice I got is to punch him when he tries to get to you again or hurt you, I will", he said.
Josh rolled his eyes with a soft smile. "Deal", he said. He rested his head on Fred's shoulder. "I'm really happy I got you", he softly said. "In every way. But especially even more now", he said. "I'm sorry that I... I didn't bring it up sooner. I... I know I was the one who said I wanted to slow down when we got back... but this month's been killing me. I... we talked, I told you things, we talked about the trauma and all but... I didn't tell you I've felt miserable because I couldn't have you", Josh said. "Should've brought that up sooner..."
"I had no idea you were hurting that much", Fred said with a worried frown. "'Cause when we would cuddle that was all I needed in that moment most of the time. I didn't... didn't need the talking or the discussing of emotions and all that. I just... needed to feel you and be held", Josh said. "But as soon as you got out of bed in the morning... then I did need that", Josh said. "I wanted the talking and the discussing of emotions and where we were at and all that", he said. "Holding hands and forehead kisses and that stuff. Made me feel... well, I guess pretty miserable, when it felt like we were a secret we somehow swore to never talk about", Josh said.
"But I'm really glad I now know that's not what it was like at all", he said. "Not at all", Fred assured him. "Never meant for you to feel that way. I was trying to respect you more than anything", he said.
"If that was respecting me, then please disrespect me", Josh said, which made them both laugh. "Man, didn't know I had that kinda kinky boyfriend", Fred said, which made Josh blush as he laughed. "Shush it", he giggled, which made Fred smile as he hugged Josh. "You're not my secret, I don't want us to be a secret. I want everyone to know you're mine, I promise you", Fred told him. "Tomorrow I'll show the entire world. If you'll allow me", he said.
"Please. Yes", Josh said. "I really want that."
//
The next day, Fred held Josh's hand everywhere they went. He had his arm around him, he kissed him in the hallways before class as he held both of his hands. He hugged him as they saw each other and he kissed his forehead right before he left for class. During the lunch, his friends were all over the moon to see that Fred and Josh were finally together, truly, and Josh leaned over to Colin.
"Now tell her. If she doesn't feel the same then you'll still be friends. If she does, you'll be the happiest man in the world", Josh tried to encourage Colin. "It will pay off."
And he truly wanted to tell her, even more now than before. He saw how Josh told Fred how he felt and it genuinely paid off like he said; he saw Josh's happy smile and how he couldn't let go of Fred. He wanted that too.
"I'll tell her tomorrow. We're going to a museum for a project then", he said. "That's perfect. I love you C, I know she does too", Josh said. "God I hope you're right", Colin sighed softly.
As they'd finished their food and Josh was eager to make out more with Fred, he let out a laugh. "I will say we can hug and kiss every time we're in public with friends but I won't make out each time because I don't wanna make things awkward for them", Fred said.
"But I will also say that right now I will 'cause I can't resist you", he smiled, making Josh giggle, and he let his lover kiss him deeply.
"We don't mind, love birds! You just got together!" Gracie said. "We love that for you!!"
As they pulled back and Fred wrapped Josh in his arms, Josh smiled and he glanced around until he tensed up when his eyes met Dustin's in the distance. He wanted to look away and hide, but instead, he stared back at him. Fred kissed his hair and held him tighter, nuzzling his nose in Josh's curls; Josh was pretty sure that he hadn't even noticed Dustin in the distance, which is what Josh wanted. He didn't want Fred to do something just to piss Dustin off. He wanted it to be genuine and still kind of rub it in Dustin's face just so Josh could have a little bit of payback too.
He was lovable. He was loved by Fred. The person Dustin was convinced he'd scared off and didn't want anything to do with him. No, quite the opposite; Fred told him he was obsessed with him. Obviously not in the truly weirdly creepy stalker kind of way, but in the I-don't-want-anything-else-but-to-be-with-you way. That's exactly what Josh felt like he needed.
Eventually Dustin was the one to break the eye contact and walk along - Josh saw he was slightly limping and somehow it made him feel pride in his chest, knowing he'd left his negative mark on Dustin for once, when he'd kicked him in the knee cap. And holding eye contact until Dustin broke it was another small victory that Josh would keep to himself.
"Okay! So. We've been talking..." Colin then started.
"Oh you mean about Tyler's North-American tour right? Yes! Okay yes we have been talking", she grinned. "We're all gonna see Tyler here in Detroit together", Colin said. "Since we got the tickets a while ago. You, Fred, Gracie, Michelle, Elisabeth, Kit, Joe, me. And I also know that you and Fred are gonna go see him in Indianapolis with Finn, Tom, Jona and Luca", he said.
"And I also know we can't make it to Columbus because of the exams", he added. "But I still wanted to have a best friend trip! So first I was thinking we could go visit Jenna and Jonathon and go see them in Philly with them..." he trailed and Josh tensed up. Oh no. He didn't want that. He had been avoiding them for so long now; he wasn't ready to start that whole process of making things right with them. He was so emotionally exhausted already.
"...but they sold out already so that's not an option either", Colin said. Josh felt the relief wash over him. Thank god.
"And I mentioned it a few days ago, so Gracie came up with the perfect idea", Colin said and Gracie grinned as she nodded excitedly. "Toronto!" She said.
"Toronto?!" Josh asked. "Yes! It's only, like, 40 minutes longer than going to Columbus", Colin said. "And there's tickets still!"
"Wait but I don't even have a passport", Josh said. "Then we'll get you a passport! The Canadian tour is weeks after the US tour. Plenty of time to get that done! We can drive up there and we'll get to see Tyler in another country! Wouldn't that be awesome?" Colin asked. "I- I'd love that", Josh smiled, but he bit his lip as he looked over at Fred.
"Oh don't worry, we weren't done explaining the plan yet", Gracie smiled. "We all know how much Fred has done for you and how much you needed him and he's supported you. So we were thinking... why not let Fred join you", Gracie said. "And let him take his best friend too. So it's a double best friend trip", she said.
"You- you mean Fred and Kit?" Josh asked. "Yep!" Gracie smiled. "But- but what about all of you? What about Joe?" Josh asked. "Don't worry about me", he smiled. "We're good! I can't afford another show right now anyways. Kit can, and believe it or not, he's allowed to have fun without me", Joe said, which made the rest laugh. "I'll just stay with my ladies when you guys are gone", he smiled at the girls, who immediately voiced their support. "We know we're all best friends but we also know Colin is your best friend and Kit is Fred's", Michelle smiled.
"Is that... fair to you too?" Josh asked Kit. "Me bringing my boyfriend but you not bringing yours?"
"Joe's been nothing but encouraging me to say yes and be excited about this. So yes, I am, and I'd be thrilled to go on a best friend's trip with you guys", he smiled.
"If... if I can get that passport in time, then... let's do it", Josh smiled. "I'll make sure to work extra to make it possible", he said. Colin let out an excited squeak and he leaned over the table to kiss Josh's cheek. "Ahh I can't wait. First show of Ty out of the country! It's gonna be amazing", he sighed happily. "Thank you for helping me with this Gracie", he smiled as he hugged her. "Of course C! You know I love you all", she smiled as she hugged him back.
"Also, I think we should order pizzas and celebrate that these guys are finally a couple!" Gracie added. Josh let out a laugh as he hugged Fred, smiling as he rested his head on his shoulder. "I didn't know being with you would also get me pizza. If I'd known sooner..." Josh trailed, making Fred laugh. "Oh shush. I love you", he chuckled.
//
Tyler had been noticing his success more and more over the next months, getting radio show invitations almost every day, and he was even invited for interviews and live performances on national TV. His album and his songs were being nominated for awards, and he won several. He even attended award shows with his closest guys; Jordan, Michael, Mark, Shap, Shane and Ashley, who he'd gotten really close with too. She became part of the full-time crew, which they were all excited about.
During his tour he did signing sessions and Q&A's, wanting to connect with fans and show them that no matter what, he'd still put in the effort to meet them, even though the venues he was playing at now were too big to do casual meet and greets afterwards outside of the backstage exits.
Astronaut had hit unlike anything else he'd done, so much that the tour he had planned as a support act was being canceled because now Tyler was selling out those same venues all on his own.
And throughout all of that, Tyler had been dating the producer of the album, William.
Somehow he had convinced himself that this success wasn't just because of his own talent. It was mainly because of him, the producer, instead. Tyler had convinced himself that if it wasn't for him, he would've never gotten there. And because of that, he was tightly holding on, and he didn't want to let go. He felt like he couldn't.
When Tyler's tour reached the west coast, they stayed there to work on new music for a while. Tyler had been dating William for months now, and everything was going great. He was feeling great, he was doing perfect, and he was head-over-heels in love.
At least, that's what everyone thought, 'cause that's what Tyler told.
In reality, it was a bit different.
Instead of everything being perfect, Tyler had put on a mask to everyone - even sometimes himself - while he felt absolutely miserable inside. Tyler was working on a new album and now that he had gotten so popular and his music blew up, Tyler couldn't risk ruining that. The next album had to be perfect, everyone had to love it, and if not; Tyler would lose everything. And because his last album was such a hit, which was produced by William, he was absolutely convinced that he would fail without him. He needed William.
And while Tyler had genuine feelings for him, genuine love; he felt miserable. 'Cause the words William said, they hurt. They were damaging him every single day. Saying Tyler had to be thinner, had to be more muscular, dress differently to look hot for the ladies and definitely not share that he was gay, even though they were fucking in the studio every damn day. That was also how Tyler met him; while he was recording Astronaut with him, they ended up hooking up after hours, and he'd kept it a secret for months until he shared with Steve and Lucas that they were talking. No mention of the sex that had occurred weeks before. That's why he got so mad at Steve - and himself mostly - too; he hooked up with Steve while he was actually already sleeping with William several times, and they'd been "dating" for a while. That was why he hated that Steve spoke negatively about him. He didn't want to feel like a failure.
Shortly after Bonnaroo he and William started officially dating - as in being a couple - and their close friends and family knew but it was a huge secret to the outside world.
The fact that William hurt Tyler with his words once in a while, was fine, Tyler told himself; it was coming from a place of love. William wanted him to succeed. That's why he said those things.
But telling someone who'd recovered from an eating disorder that he had to be thinner and more muscular, was never really a good idea. Tyler was scared of going back to that, but sometimes he felt the urge to.
They spent most days in the studio as long as possible, working on the new stuff Tyler - but mostly William - had come up with, and he prayed to God that this album was gonna be as good as the rest. It wasn't really like what he'd do if it was just him, but he knew William knew best. He just had to do what he said.
Michael had gone out to get lunch, when he came back to the studio. He walked through the building and down the hall to their studio room, then opened the door, when he froze.
What he saw, was William having sex with another guy, and it was not Tyler. He froze in place, but William did not. He just kept going.
"Looking for Tyler? He's not here, he's down the hall somewhere", he said. "Close the door when you leave, please."
Michael felt the anger in his chest. "Oh you sick fucking bastard", he growled, before he left - leaving the door wide open on purpose - making his way down the hall. "Tyler", he spoke. "Tyler!"
//
Tyler heard Michael's voice coming down the hall. "Mhm?" He hummed, lighting a cigarette. He took a deep, long drag, slowly blowing out the smoke.
"Tyler. Do you know where William is?" Michael spoke as he came into the room and he closed the door.
"Yeah, in studio 2 with Xander", he said with a monotone voice. Xander was William's personal assistant.
"They're not... working, Ty. They're... doing something else", Michael said. "I- I don't know how to say this to you Ty, but they're... they're having sex", he said. Tyler didn't reply right away, not taking his eyes off the wall he was staring at.
"I know", he said softly.
Michael's jaw dropped. "You know?! What do you mean you know?! Ty he's- he's cheating on you in there! Two doors down the hall! What do you mean you know?!" He asked.
"I mean it as in I fucking know. I know he's fucking Xander, I know he fucks other people and I know he cheats on me", Tyler said. "So you- you've known for a while? You and him have been broken up for a while already?" Michael asked.
"Nope", Tyler said softly. "...You broke up recently?" Michael then asked. "...Nope", Tyler said again.
"...Tyler please don't tell me you're still with him", Michael softly said. "Alright, I won't say it", Tyler muttered as he took a drag from his cigarette. "Tyler! Why the hell would you forgive him for cheating if he's still actively and shamelessly doing it right next to you?! Why are you still with him?! He doesn't deserve you! You're way too good for him! You don't deserve a partner who cheats on you, especially so shamelessly and so often apparently! What the hell are you doing to yourself?!" Michael asked. He was stunned, frustrated; he just couldn't believe it.
"I- I can't- I can't leave him Michael", Tyler said as he swallowed difficultly. "I can't do that, I... I need him. I need him", he muttered. "No you don't Ty, he's not worth it! You will find someone who's perfect for you but it's not a fucking cheater!" Michael said. "Michael! You don't get it! If I- if I break up with him I'll lose him! And I'll- I'll fail!" Tyler said, his voice raising. "Being single is not a failure Ty", Michael said. "I'm not talking about- about being single! I'm talking about my music! My last album was a huge success but not because of me - because of him! Because of what he made me do with these songs - the changes he added and the expertise he's got is what made my album so damn successful and if I break up with him, he won't work with me again, and my next album will fail, and I'll lose everything I've tried to build and all the fans that came with Astronaut will be so disappointed and they'll hate me for failing and I'll- I'll lose everything. I would be done with! I'd be- I'd- no one would support me anymore, no one would listen to my words, no one would wanna come to my shows, my label would hate me, they'd drop me and cut me off, I'd lose everything", he said. "I can't- I can't do it without him. Not anymore", Tyler whispered.
"Jesus Christ Tyler, what the hell have you been telling yourself, what have you been convincing yourself of?" Michael said softly. "You are what made Astronaut perfect. You! Your voice, your musicianship, your writing skills. You created Astronaut and regardless of who produced it, it would've been an incredible success! You're the genius behind your music, no one else!"
"I wish that were true", Tyler sniffled, wiping some tears away. "Just leave okay? You're not helping", Tyler said. "But Ty-" Michael tried. "Leave! I don't need you to tell me lies! You can't convince me that I could do this on my own. 'Cause I can't! You saw how stuck I was without a label. I couldn't do it alone, I had to get signed! And I didn't do this alone either. He got me here, he made Astronaut perfect. I didn't do that! Just fucking leave and take your gross takeout with you. I'm not fucking hungry", Tyler said.
Michael didn't want to leave, but he knew going against Tyler right now was just gonna piss him off more. He left the room, but he stayed nearby, he stayed in the building, and he really hoped he could get through to him.
~~
Ahhh man
Joshie's been feeling better now that he's got Fred and he can be with all of his friends but Ty's in a bad position now 🥺 poor babie is unable to care for himself the way his friends want to care for him right now
What did you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts. If I get enough votes I'd love to upload an extra chapter tomorrow, so Thursday AND Friday. So please don't forget to leave a like, I'd appreciate it so much! I'll see you soon, much love ♥️