Awwww man are we ready for this?
Wattpad almost lost 3/4th of the chapter but thank god I was able to restore it omg I had a heart attack
But we're here! And the chapter is complete! So hiii!
I'm so excited for you to read this! Thank you sooo much for all your comments and votes. I'm so glad you're still loving the story as well! ♥️
Let's get into it! Some wholesome stuff in here, so I hope you'll enjoy! Excited for everything that's to come ♥️
Here it is! The new chapter. Enjoy!
Word count: 5656
~~
Josh and Tyler didn't get up right away; they talked, for almost an hour, before they did. And while they talked, Tyler didn't let go of Josh, and neither did Josh let go of Tyler. They cuddled throughout it all, and Josh had tried to hold on to that domestic, careless and stress-less feeling that he felt during that time. No worries about school, about his life, about college, about his family, his friends, or his future. No bad thoughts, no anxiety, no pain; just that moment of him and Tyler cuddling under the morning's sun rays, and Josh had wished he could've stayed in that moment forever.
When Josh and Tyler's tummies started rumbling too much, they finally got up. They went downstairs, noticing that Steve and Lucas weren't up yet, and Josh sat at the peninsula while Tyler grabbed some bread, added ham, cheese and cream cheese to it, closed them and he grilled them in a pan with some butter. "I hope you like my grilled cheese sandwiches", he smiled at Josh, who was very excited to try them as he sipped his coffee before he got into the food.
After they finished their food, Tyler opened the doors to the rooftop terrace and he shivered, since he still wasn't wearing a shirt, but went outside and sat down anyways, together with Josh. He wrapped the blanket that he'd grabbed on their way outside around them both, shuffling close so they could share the warmth and the blanket, and Tyler lit a cigarette. Josh's feet were on the seat, and Tyler's arm was wrapped around one of Josh's legs, gently caressing his thumb against the boy as they talked, and Josh still couldn't believe exactly how affectionate Tyler was. He wouldn't change it for the world, though. Tyler made him feel extremely happy, and giddy, and he was fucking with Josh in every damn way possible. Josh embraced all of it.
"Good beautiful morning, cuddle bugs", a familiar voice then spoke, and they looked up to see Steve, and then also Lucas, approach them with smiles. "Hi baby", Tyler smiled, kissing Steve's lips as he bent over to kiss Tyler's, and for the first time, Josh felt kind of... jealous, in a way. When he realized that he did, he panicked, shoving the feeling out of the door as quickly as he could - he'd address that later, when he was alone. Not now. This was not the time.
"Hey Joshie", Steve said as he pressed a kiss atop of his hair, and Josh smiled. "Hi Steve", he said, his panicking replaced by how dang sweet Steve was to him. "How did you two sleep?" Lucas asked as they greeted him, and Steve lit a cigarette as well as they both sat down. "We slept well. Really well, actually", Tyler smiled. "Because you cuddled?" Steve asked with a soft smirk, and Tyler chuckled. "Yeah. Lots of cuddling", he hummed, making Josh blush.
"We cuddled too!" Lucas said happily, and Tyler let out a laugh. "You better not made out without me there", Tyler said. "Oh no, never", Steve chuckled as he took a drag from his cigarette. "We cuddled plenty, though. It was nice", he said and Lucas nodded. "I don't know why I get so happy about you guys cuddling", Tyler laughed. "I guess it just... makes me happy to know that you truly don't mind me cuddling with my friends or with Lucas either", Tyler smiled at Steve. "I really don't, for me it's all good", Steve assured him with a smile.
"Have you been awake for a while already?" Lucas asked. "Yeah, we've had breakfast and we've been awake for a few hours now", Tyler said. "Oh man, we slept in huh", Lucas chuckled. "Yesterday was a long day. We all got up super early and went to bed late, so I don't blame you guys", Tyler said.
"I just didn't wanna waste my time sleeping while I could be spending it with Josh."
Josh blushed as Tyler spoke the words, resting his head on Tyler's shoulder as he did so. He saw Steve's smile, knowing that everything they did was alright. He didn't mind.
"Well, I think I'm gonna go take a shower", Steve said as he stretched his arms out, taking a last drag from his cigarette before he extinguished it. "Me too. Will you use the upstairs bathroom so I can use the downstairs one?" Lucas asked. "Yeah, I will", Steve nodded. "Alright, then I'm gonna shower now so we can eat after and then get ready for the boys", he said as he got up and he went inside.
"The boys?" Tyler asked. "Yeah. Did you forget that Jordan, Mark and Michael are coming over?" Steve asked. "Oh shoot", Tyler said. "Yeah I totally forgot about that." "Should I... leave early?" Josh asked softly. "No! No, don't leave early!" Steve said. "You better not leave early. I already dread the moment you have to leave. I am not gonna let you leave early", Tyler told Josh, and somehow it wasn't... jokingly. He was serious, and it sounded like he was... stern, in a way. It made Josh's heart beat in his throat. "O-okay", he replied as he nodded softly.
"They're just coming over to look at some of the footage of the concert with us together", Steve said. "Mark has worked through some of it and we planned a watch party since Lucas is leaving tonight as well. We wanted him to be here, and now we want you to be here too", Steve said. Josh smiled softly. "I'll stay, then", he smiled. "Good", Steve returned it. "I'm gonna go shower now", he said.
Tyler and Josh stayed for one more cigarette, before he lead Josh upstairs to get ready, since they were still wearing the clothes they'd slept in. Tyler opened the closet doors and took his sweatpants off - no warning, no nothing, making Josh totally freak out inside as he saw Tyler only in his boxers. Tyler put on jeans and a button down, when he turned around and he saw that Josh hadn't changed yet. "Oh, uh, sorry", Tyler said. "I'll give you some privacy, yeah?" He asked as he buttoned the buttons, much to Josh's dismay, as he saw the tattoos disappear behind the fabric. "Y-yeah, okay", Josh blushed. Tyler smiled, then left the room and closed the door behind him.
Josh buried his face in the pillow, slightly yelling at himself - not too loudly, since Steve was in the bathroom next door. He could feel how red his face was, how much he was blushing and freaking out and his heart was beating a million times per minute at everything that had happened and was still happening, and he felt light headed. He took a few moments to breathe deeply in and out, before he rummaged through his suitcase and he changed into different clothes. He then went back downstairs and joined Tyler on the couch while Lucas started breakfast for him and Steve, who came downstairs moments later - sexy as ever, with his hair wet and no shirt on as he hadn't been sure if Josh was still in the bedroom and he didn't just want to walk in on him. He figured he'd eat breakfast first, before going upstairs to get dressed fully.
Tyler gave Josh one of the pro controllers of his Switch. "We're gonna play It Takes Two", he told Josh. "Oh I- I'm- I'm not good at games", he said. "I don't really... play games." "You're missing out, Joshie", Tyler said. "You'll get the hang of it. It's not a hard game, it just takes some getting used to. I'm not taking no for an answer", Tyler said. Josh rolled his eyes shyly. "I'll try", he said.
They didn't stop playing the game until the bell rang, and the boys arrived. "Hello handsome bunch!" Michael's voice sounded loudly, when he gasped. "JOSH!" he exclaimed as he saw Josh on the couch, and Josh blushed as he waved at him. "Hi", he smiled. "What are you doing here?!" he exclaimed as he ran over to Josh, lifting him off the couch as he hugged him, making Josh's eyes widened as he quickly grabbed on to Michael, so he wouldn't fall.
"He stayed the night", Tyler chuckled. "What?!" he gasped as he put Josh back down. "He was supposed to fly back home yesterday, but... he missed his flight, basically", Tyler said. "So he stayed with us", he smiled.
"I cannot believe you had a sleep over with Josh without me", Michael said. "Sorry bub, next time we'll invite you", Tyler chuckled as he got up. "Hey baby, did you say we had some snacks for the watch party too?" Tyler asked as he wrapped his arms around Steve's waist, then kissed his lips.
"...okay what's going on here", Jordan said as he narrowed his eyes. "What?" Tyler asked, then looked at Jordan and he understood what he meant. "Oh! Josh caught me and Steve kissing yesterday, before the after party, so now he knows", Tyler chuckled and Steve hummed with a nod. "Much easier to have him over for two days when he knows we're a thing", Steve chuckled and Tyler agreed with a laugh.
"Joshie?"
"Yeah Luke?"
"Oh woah woah wait, okay hold on. Hold the fuck up", Mark then said. "We missed way more than just that", he said as his jaw dropped. "He- Josh-", he said. "He knows my name, yeah", Lucas chuckled. "And that Lucas is my ex-boyfriend, and that Steve and I are together, and that Steve was addicted to drugs in the past, and that I struggled with an eating disorder, and how Lucas and I broke up, and how terribly I handled that, and how Steve and I got together and how I messed up when we were intimate, and how I'm now terrified of making that mistake again, and how my mom and I aren't in a great place right now, and how she and my dad had an awful relationship when I grew up but only started actually working well together in the last few years..." Tyler listed.
"Oh fucking Christ, he knows everything", Mark muttered. "Yeah, basically", Tyler smiled. "Oh and Steve and Lucas made out, by the way."
"WHAT!" Jordan exclaimed. "It was a dare!" Lucas laughed. "And Tyler was our hype man. He was more excited about it than any of us", Steve said. "Shut the fuck up. Oh you kinky motherfucker, I hate you", Michael told him. "I cannot believe we didn't see you for like, what, not even 48 hours. More like 36 hours. And we missed so much! What the hell!" he said.
"That's why we're catching you up now", Tyler chuckled. "Wait!! So Josh is one of us now?? He's part of the group?" Michael asked excitedly. "I mean..." Tyler trailed. "He absolutely is. He knows everything! C'mon now", Mark said, and Tyler let out a laugh. "I... guess so", he smiled, and as he looked over at Josh, who was blushing.
"Anyways, Joshie, what I wanted to ask", Lucas chuckled. "What time does your flight leave again?" He asked. "Uhm it was 9:15 ish", Josh said. "Alright, then you gotta be there around 7-7:15... We'll have time for dinner before you gotta leave then", he said. "I- I mean, if it's too early to have dinner..." he started. "No, nuh uh, I'm not letting you leave and get on that plane until you've had dinner. I'm not gonna let you do that on an empty stomach", Tyler interrupted him, and Josh smiled softly. "Okay", he said.
They got settled on the couches as Tyler and Steve grabbed snacks and drinks for everyone, while Mark hooked up his laptop to the TV. The footage was very raw and unedited still, but they loved watching it anyways - especially Josh. Steve kept telling him how great Tyler did at certain parts, with the occasional I told you so, as Tyler had been worried he'd mess it all up.
"Ohh there it is, the most special moment", Mark smirked as they saw Steve turn around and kneel in front of Tyler as he sang, and Tyler's smile widened as he saw the way they had recorded it perfectly, and it look darn good.
"This was- that was one of my favorite moments", Josh blushed as he softly admitted it to Tyler, who was - of course - sitting next to him. "It was?" Tyler smiled and Josh nodded. "It just looked so beautiful", he said. "It's like... Like Steve's handing over his power to give it to you, so you could have your moment without him taking the spotlight away from you, and there's zero regrets in his mind", he said. Tyler bit his lip, smiling as he looked at the screen, then grabbed Josh's hand and he intertwined them. "I didn't know he was gonna do that. He wasn't supposed to", Tyler told him. "Really?" Josh gasped softly. "I thought that was planned", he said. "Oh no, it wasn't", Tyler said with a soft laugh. "Took me by surprise." "That just makes it even more beautiful", Josh muttered.
After they looked at tons of footage, they decided to call it quits and Tyler and Steve wanted to have another cigarette. They went outside, but Tyler insisted that Josh would join them, 'cause he honestly didn't wanna lose sight of Josh even once until he'd get on that plane.
Jordan, Mark and Michael hung around for a while, before they said goodbye 'cause they were driving back to Columbus that day. They'd be back in Detroit after several days, as Tyler was about to go into the studio with the band again, but Tyler insisted on them taking a few days off because of everything they did for the show the week prior. They said goodbye, all three of them hugging Josh and Lucas tightly as they wouldn't be seeing them when they'd get back to Detroit, and then they left.
"We don't usually have take out as often as we're doing these past few days", Tyler chuckled as they ordered Greek food. "But I don't wanna waste my time cooking when I can spend it with you."
The men sat outside as they had dinner, the fire turned on again. Tyler was next to Josh, his legs over one of Josh's legs with his feet tucked underneath the other leg, staying as close to him as he possibly could. Why Tyler wanted to be so close to him was something he'd think about later; for now, he just knew that Josh was special to him.
"How are you feeling?" Tyler asked after he put his takeout box down, draping his arm around Josh's neck. "Eh, fifty-fifty", Josh said. "I'm... happy", he smiled softly. "But sad that I have to leave soon." "Yeah, me too", Tyler sighed softly. "You and Luke are both leaving today, so I gotta miss you both at the same time", he said. "Oh right, I forgot that Lucas is going back today too", he said.
"I'll only been two to three hours away, though", Lucas said. "Wish you were closer to us too." "Me too", Josh said, a soft smile, but it was quite a sad one. "Whenever we'll get to LA, we should definitely meet up though", Steve said. "Or when you're near us too!" Lucas said, and Josh blushed. "I- I'd like that", he said. "So would we", Lucas smiled. "Right Ty?" He asked. "Yeah, yeah of course", Tyler smiled.
"If we didn't have to get in the studio tomorrow, I might've gotten on the plane with you", Tyler joked, and Josh let out a soft laugh. "I wish", he chuckled. "I wouldn't have a nice apartment like this for you to stay at, though. Not even a guest room because I have three other siblings", he chuckled.
"I'll gladly sleep on a mattress on the floor in your bedroom", Tyler shrugged. "Oh no no, I mean, I have a bed", Josh chuckled. "Yeah but I wouldn't want to take your bed and have you sleep on the floor", Tyler replied. "It's a double bed", Josh laughed softly. "...that changes things and I don't know why I assumed it was a single bed", he said, and they all laughed. "Maybe you should just stay in a hotel though. My house is so crowded", Josh said. "Nah, I can handle that. I'd choose a homemade breakfast over hotel breakfast for sure", Tyler said. Josh let out a soft laugh. "I can't imagine you sitting at the breakfast table with my parents and siblings", he giggled. "I think I'd have a great time!" Tyler said, which just made Josh laugh more.
"I could probably use some domestic family time right now, regardless of whose family it is", he added. Josh could feel his heart ache a little; he knew Tyler wasn't on great terms with his mom right now. "Do you think you'll see your family again soon?" Tyler asked. "I'm not sure yet", he said. "We should, though", Steve said. "Maybe we can go over for dinner soon." "...maybe", Tyler said. "I'll have to introduce you and all that, ugh", Tyler whined. "Jesus Ty, don't make him feel like you don't want your family to meet him", Lucas said. "I- no I didn't mean that", Tyler said. "I know, but it sounded like it", Lucas said.
"No, no no that's not what I meant baby", Tyler said. "I just... I want my sister to know you, and I know they'll love you. I'm just... not looking forward to telling my mom because she made these comments about Luke that I'm still not over", he said.
"I know baby, I know. It's alright", Steve smiled. "I still really want to meet your family, though." "Yeah, we'll... we'll do it, I promise", Tyler said. "Just... need a few more days", he said. "That's okay love", Steve smiled.
Tyler didn't leave Josh's side, until Lucas reminded them that they were gonna have to get ready if they wanted to get Josh to the airport in time. "I don't wanna", Josh softly told Tyler. "Me neither baby", he sighed as he rested his head against Josh's. He breathed in deeply, closing his eyes as he wrapped both arms around his neck. "I'm gonna miss you so much", he said softly. "I'm gonna miss you more", Josh whispered. He felt Tyler's lips against his temple, leaving a firm kiss on his skin. "C'mon, I'll help you get your stuff", he said softly as he got up and he held his hand out for Josh to grab. He didn't let go as they made their way upstairs, only when Josh put his stuff in his suitcase and closed it. "You got everything? Not forgetting anything?" Tyler asked. "I- I don't think so", Josh replied. "Alright", Tyler nodded. Josh rose to his feet and grabbed the suitcase, but Tyler hesitated, not leaving the room yet. "I- wait", he said, gesturing for Josh to put the suitcase down, which he did.
Tyler grabbed Josh's hand as he sat down on the bed, pulling him closer so he'd sit down too. When he did so, Tyler wrapped his arms around Josh, giving him one of the biggest hugs he'd ever given him, holding him tightly and for a long time, not wanting to let go. "Oh I really wish you didn't have to go, I don't want to let go", Tyler whispered. "T-ty, stop", Josh said with a shy laugh. "You're making me cry." Tyler pulled back just a little, just to see Josh's face, as Josh wiped a tear away. "I'm making myself cry too", Tyler laughed softly as he wiped his own cheeks, then pressed a long and firm kiss on Josh's forehead. "Gosh, I'm sorry for acting so dumb", Tyler said. "No you're- you're not", Josh replied. "But leaving is getting increasingly harder", he said with a soft smile, and Tyler returned it. "You're just... really important to me", Tyler told him. "So are you, you're so so so dang important to me", Josh softly said. "I love you", Tyler sighed as he hugged Josh tightly. "I love you too Ty", he softly said.
As they heard Lucas's voice, reminding them that they really had to leave now, they pulled back and went downstairs. Josh grabbed his jacket and backpack, while Steve carried his suitcase, they went down to Steve's car and got in. This time Steve drove to the airport, with Lucas next to him, and of course Tyler was next to Josh. Their hands were intertwined.
Saying goodbye was tough, even tougher than the day before. Josh was sniffling, eyes teary, and Tyler tried not to but so were his. Steve and Lucas gave him tight hugs too, kisses on his forehead and his cheeks from all three men, and they all told him they'd miss him. 'Cause that was true; they truly all felt like they were gonna miss Josh. and Josh was absolutely going to miss them even more, too.
He'd been miserable for a long time, but this weekend made him forget about all of it. Spending so much time with Tyler had been unreal, and he couldn't believe that it all happened. But oh god, was he happy that it did. They were the best days of his life so far. They truly were.
"I love you Josh, be careful. Get home safe, let us know when you get home okay?" was the last thing Tyler told him before he pressed one more firm kiss on his face, and Josh gave him a shy kiss on his cheek as they gave each other one last tight hug. "I love you too", he told Tyler. "I will. Thank you for everything", he whispered, then they let go and Josh was walking away.
Lucas's arm found its way around Tyler as they saw him leave, and they all waved when Josh did so, a soft smile on his face before he was out of sight. Tyler felt like he was glued to the floor for a few moments after that, when he turned to his soulmates. "We can't leave yet", Tyler said. "Not until I know he's at the gate. If anything similar like yesterday happened... I need to be here", Tyler told them. "Alright baby, we will", Steve assured him. They went to the Starbucks that they'd been at the day before, sitting down as they knew they'd be there for a while. Tyler asked Josh to keep them up to date and let them know when he was at his gate, and Josh didn't reply right away as he was probably going through customs but when he did, he let him know that he would.
After almost an hour, Josh's gate was announced and he went there. When he was sure that it was the right one, he let Tyler know that he was there and everything had gone well. Only then, Tyler was okay with leaving the airport.
Tyler: be safe, joshua.
Josh: I will <3
Tyler: love you. <3
Josh: I love you too.
//
"I can't believe you have to leave as well", Tyler whined softly as Lucas was about to go to his car to drive back home. "I'm close, baby. Not even three hours away. Whenever you guys got some time off, and you wanna see me, let me know okay? I'll come over", Lucas told them. "Yeah, I- yeah. Please do so", Tyler softly said. "Of course baby, always", Lucas assured him.
He said goodbye to Steve, sharing a tight hug. Their bond had grown massively over the weekend, just like Josh and Tyler's - it made Tyler happy. He was so glad his soulmates could get along so greatly. He'd been so scared that something wouldn't work, or that they wouldn't like each other, or that Steve would be jealous of Lucas. None of that was true, and it made Tyler so, so happy.
They went down to Lucas's car, and Tyler peppered kisses all over his face and hugged him tighter than ever before he let him get into his car. "I love you baby, so so so insanely much", Tyler told him. "I love you more than anything, Ty", Lucas smiled at him. "I'll see you soon. Keep me up to date with your crazy life, yeah baby?" he asked. Tyler smiled softly as he nodded. "Yeah, I will", he smiled.
Lucas squeezed Tyler's hand gently, before they let go and he closed the window. Tyler moved aside, towards Steve, so Lucas could pull out of the parking lot and leave the garage. They waved at Lucas until he was out of sight.
"And then it was only us", Steve said as he wrapped his arm around Tyler's neck. Tyler rested his head against his lover's shoulder. "I kinda missed time alone with you too", he said. "Me too. But I've had one of the best few days", Steve replied. "Yeah, me too", Tyler smiled.
They went upstairs, cleaned the apartment a bit - loaded the dishwasher, threw dirty towels and clothes in the laundry machine, Tyler cleaned the countertops and stove while Steve wiped the coffee table and side tables down, since some circles from their drinking glasses had been left on there.
They made their way outside, sitting down on the couch as Steve turned the fire on. They both lit a cigarette, soft music playing in the background. They didn't speak, they just held each other as they looked at the night sky.
They hollowed me out, wore me like a glove. I shook so many hands I've been dreaming of. You can use my rib cage as a pillow; it doesn't suit me. I feel flimsy when I grin, like a stretched out piece of skin.
"They really all left today", Tyler then said. "Josh left, Lucas left, Mike, Mark and Jordan left too", he said. "Oh right, I forgot that they left for home this afternoon as well", he said. Tyler nodded.
"Do we still have some weed left?" he asked. "I don't really wanna get super high, I just... wanna relax a bit. My mind is going to every place I don't want it to go to", he said. "I'll go check, hm?" Steve asked as he pressed a kiss on Tyler's forehead. "Yeah. Can we watch a movie?" He asked. "Of course, baby, but let's smoke outside first okay? Been keeping my apartment and home mainly smoke free and I kinda wanna keep it that way", Steve said. "That's alright, definitely", Tyler smiled. He kissed his lover, who got up and soon returned with some leftover from their last time smoking. "Not much, but enough to take the edge off", Steve said and Tyler nodded, opening the small ziploc bag as he fished it out of there. They lit it, taking turns taking drags, and Tyler welcomed the feeling of relaxation and a clear mind with open arms.
Once they finished, they went inside. Tyler turned on the TV and found a movie he wanted to watch, while Steve got them drinks. He joined his lover on the couch, cuddling up under a blanket together with the fireplace on, and they watched the movie.
By the end of it, the weed had worn off mostly, as they hadn't smoked much in the first place, and Tyler was cuddly. Needy, in a way. They were making out as the credits rolled, and Tyler was in his lap as he pulled back.
"Let's try it", he softly said. "I- what?" Steve asked. "Let's try it. Let's do it, let's- I wanna try it, I wanna make love to you", he told his lover. "...are you sure? I- I don't wanna do it if you're not sober enough", Steve said. "I don't want you to regret it and I don't want you to forget about it either", he said. "I won't. I swear, I'm barely feeling anything. You can't tell me you're not basically sober right now when it comes to your head", he said to Steve. "I... I don't really feel it anymore either", he said. "Then let's do it, yeah? I... I really want to. I wanna try, I... I wanna be with you. I wanna be intimate with you, I want you to make love to me, I want to share that with you 'cause I love you so much", Tyler told him softly.
Steve thought about it for just a small moment, when their lips connected. Tyler wrapped his legs tightly around Steve's waist as he was lifted in the air as he got up, carrying his lover up the stairs as they made out. Steve gently put Tyler down on the bed after he kicked the door closed, they took off each other's clothes, and this time Tyler didn't want to be on top. This time, he wanted to be underneath his lover, he wanted to give him the power, and he wanted to be made love to. He wanted to cherish the kisses and soft bites on his neck, he wanted to let his lover take over, he wanted to experience it all and he wanted it badly.
Steve did exactly that.
//
As Josh sat in his very luxurious first class airplane seat, he cuddled up with his blanket as he watched the world through the window. He tried to sleep for a while, but he couldn't. His mind was racing, and he couldn't stop thinking about everything that happened - and he couldn't stop thinking about Tyler.
He felt his chest tighten at the mere thought of him, his stomach feeling odd. He let out a shaky, nervous breath. He was thinking of Tyler so much, and how they held hands countless of times, how they cuddled, how Tyler rested his head on Josh's chest and Josh fell asleep with his head on Tyler's chest; how he held him so close, and Tyler didn't allow him to let go. How they talked about so many heavy things but there was no judgement in sight. How he felt comfortable talking to Tyler about it, feeling like Tyler understood him like no one ever had. He had felt sad last time when they had to leave Tyler, when they were in Ohio, but this time it wasn't even remotely comparable. This time, he felt like he had to let go of one of the most important people in his life.
He didn't know when he'd talk to Tyler again. He didn't know when he'd see him again. He didn't know when - or if - he'd ever get to hug Tyler again. To hear him laugh at a silly joke Josh made, or to feel his fingers open his hand as he intertwined them with Josh's. How his lips closed around the cigarettes he smoked, how he was so open with Josh to the point where he wasn't afraid to show Josh his scars, or his thin body. He didn't know if he'd ever hear Tyler tell him he loved him again, he didn't know if Tyler would truly miss him the way he said he would - the way Josh would miss him. He didn't know if he'd ever experience anything that happened, and it hurt.
He felt... heartbroken.
When he realized that, he breathed in sharply. He felt his eyes sting, his breath quiver, and guilt wash over him. He was thinking of Tyler and what he felt when he was with Tyler so much, that he barely thought of the person he should be thinking about: Jonathon. His boyfriend. Josh swallowed difficultly, trying to take deep breaths. There was no way, right?
Right?
There's no way that Josh actually had feelings for Tyler. No, he was his idol. His celebrity crush for a reason. The weekend had been an emotional roller coaster that made him feel all kinds of different, weird, new things, and he was just confused right now. He wasn't actually in love with Tyler. He was just confused. He would go home and see Jonathon again and everything would be the way it was before this trip. He didn't have actual feelings for Tyler. He was definitely not actually in love with him.
...right?
~~
RIIIGHT??
Joshie is panickingggg
What did you think? I'd looove to hear! He finally went home 😭 let's shed a collective tear. Some more time skips and a bit less detailed chapters are ahead! So we can make some more progress in the story (:
Ty's a sweetie when it comes to Josh and it makes my heart happy haha. Yesss, I know I wrote these things myself. Doesn't change anything for me haha, I loveeee them so much it hurts they're my babies 😭
Really wanted Josh to have a moment with Mikey and the others before he'd go back to LA! Thought that would be so cute 🥹 especially since they're all so excited about Tyler letting Josh in haha. Thought that would be a nice add on ♥️
Alright loves! I'll see you at the next one. Thank you for your support, I love you!